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“For those of you just joining us: What you are looking at is the work of ZFT, a terrorist organization responsible for at least a half a dozen biological attacks over the last several months. Everything we know thus far can be found in your packets (or Blu-rays), including a copy of their manifesto which elucidates their ideology and their methods. Which boils down to the following: Attempting to provoke or prepare for a war. With who? That’s the question, isn’t it? What we do know is that these bizarre acts seem to be increasing in frequency and that their targets are unpredictable and therefore unprotectable. Those of you assembled in this room now have a clear-cut goal…”

That goal is to rush out and pick up the high definition, Blu-ray release of the first season of JJ Abrams latest television enigma

“Happy 200th, everybody. Only 75 shows in the history of television have reached 200 episodes. Only 4 other shows currently on the air have produced 200 episodes, and of those only 2 feature live actors. And, it’s worth noting that both of those shows were in the top of the Nielsen ratings before CSI came along and knocked them off of that perch.”

And, after 9 years and over 200 episodes, CSI has enjoyed an almost unprecedented near decade as the number one show in the country. It’s a rare thing to go so long and keep the core of your team intact. Up until now CSI has added characters, but has not lost a major character. But things are about to change.

If someone told you there was a movie out there starring David Carradine, Bruce Dern, and Rip Torn as three retired sea captains sharing a house together, what would your expectations be? I personally would expect a raucous production with colorful characters and a whole lot of the kind of scenery-chewing that those three guys are known for. However, set it at the turn of the century, fill it with unmemorable supporting actors, and change its title from Chatham (not a great title I admit) to the far more generic The Golden Boys, and it doesn’t take a perch in the crow’s nest to see that this schooner is close-hauled and tacking into the wind. See what I did there? I cleverly used nautical terminology to illustrate the disappointing quality of a movie about sailors. Now I feel like a big-time reviewer.

When we left J.D., Turk, and the rest of the staff of Sacred Heart Hospital at the end of their seventh season, there were good reasons to believe we had seen the last of Scrubs:

1)    The show had suffered the lowest ratings in its history.

2)    It was widely considered to be the show’s least funny season, at times treading perilously close to levels of cloying sentimentality not seen since the last few seasons of M*A*S*H*.

3)    NBC had announced that they would not be renewing the show.

This is the story of three young girls who live in squaller with their strung-out, prostitute mother and a lineup of pimps, hookers, and johns parading through their home and lives. They attempt to maintain some sense of normality in their day-to-day but are ultimately seeking escape.

Scooby Doo has spanned generations and over 40 years. Since the 1960’s the name and conventions have become a part of the pop culture. The original cartoon series had a series of conventions. The Scooby Gang would drive around in their green Mystery Machine van and solve ghostly mysteries. Fans of the show quickly grew to learn that these spirits and goblins were usually just normal people using scare tactics to get revenge or make a profit. The cartoon classic spawned music albums, live action movies, and several new shows and animated features.

Already languishing in the $6.99 bin at my local Blockbuster, and with dismal reviews on its release, my hopes for The Haunting of Molly Hartley were not high. However, after viewing the DVD I can safely report that the movie falls firmly into the ‘not anywhere as awful as I thought it was going to be’ category.

To the point, Criminal Minds is very compelling television. Ever since The Silence Of The Lambs and perhaps long before, we have been fascinated by serial killers and the profilers who try to get inside their heads. To see evidence of the continuing trend, one needs only look toward the success of films like Zodiac and shows like Dexter. Of course, serial killers are not the only prey this FBI team pursues, but they are certainly the marquee item on the agenda. To be sure, there are equally disturbing subjects such as arsonists, bombers, kidnappers, and rapists to give the show a touch of variety, but let’s face it, it’s the killers that keep us tuned so attentively

Ken Olin is truly a great talent that I’ve followed back when he played the snotty detective Garibaldi on Hill Street Blues. Since then he’s done some wonderful work behind the camera, and Brothers & Sisters certainly shows his influence; however, this is not some of his best work. The show often leans on clichés and gets awfully lazy in moving forward at times. I do see the great family of characters they created here, but fail to find them interesting beyond the life breathed into them by their performers.

The residents of Wisteria Lane have become household staples in the last four years. Even after watching the show, I’m still not sure I understand what it’s about, but I’ll try and give my take on it anyway. It would appear to this reviewer that the show owes at least part of its genesis to the HBO hit Sex And The City. There is the same narrative angle, this time by a deceased member of the group. Still, that narrative contains many of the same kinds of observations as the HBO show and appears to imitate it as often as not. The show also deals with the exploits, often sexual, of a group of women. This time they are married, but that doesn’t seem to stop the flings, or at least the fantasies any.