Disc Reviews

“Yo, if y'all watchin' this tape right now, that means I didn't make it. Either I'm a prisoner, or, worse, dead. But, either way it goes, I'mma tell y'all the rules to survive this situation. Rule number one: you gotta be quick. Rule number two: don't fall down. And rule number three: whatever you do, never look back. Y'all wish me luck.” 

The film that started it all. The Wayans’ family masterpiece. There are a lot of things I can say about this parody film that served as the blueprint for all the parodies that would come. I think it goes without saying that Scary Movie is the definitive blueprint for the modern cinematic spoof, a crude yet undeniably sharp demolition of late-1990s pop culture. Directed by Keenan Ivory Wayans, the film took the self-aware DNA of Wes Craven's Scream and infused it with a relentless barrage of slapstick gags and served as a breakout film for Regina Hall and Ana Farris as well as the cinematic careers for Shawn and Marlon Wayans.

"Go and pretend to be someone you're not. Lie to everyone. Risk your life on a daily basis. Then come home. Just f'in deal. No glamour. No money. No exploding watch. A nation needs protecting, it builds an organization, the CIA. This department, it seeks us out, targets us individuals who need something, something they can't get anywhere else. It nurtures us. Weans us. Feeds us and sends us out into the world to behave in entirely unhealthy, devious, deviant, and dangerous ways. And when we come back it asks us how we feel. And all the while it's hoping we don't suddenly flip and can no longer do the job."

From the opening credits of the pilot, The Agency lets you know exactly what kind of a show it intends to be. It prepares us in a quick instant for what we should expect. How does it do that so fast? It's the opening notes of the U2 song Love Is Blindness, performed by Jack White. The song and the graphics of those credits look and sound like an iconic James Bond film credits sequence. It doesn't hurt that there was a time that Michael Fassbender was under serious consideration for the role of James Bond. I don't know how serious it was. I don't know how close he might have actually gotten. What I do know is that The Agency gives him the chance to live out a very Bond-like fantasy.

"We have lost our center as a family, and I have to be honest that we have lived a fairly blessed life to this point, so the contrast. Mine is not a family designed to withstand tragedy. In fact, it's quite the opposite."

From Madison Avenue in Manhattan to the Madison River in Montana there is somewhat of a wide gulf of culture and standards of living. That's exactly the kind of setup that is perfect for a guy like Taylor Sheridan. His entire life has been about thriving within that contrast. He's created a new genre that one could call the modern western series. The man himself is cut from both worlds, so he understands the territory. He planned to be finished a bit ago, but he fell in love with a $300 million ranch, and to pay for it he's cut a deal with Paramount+ to be doing this for quite a while longer. That means fans of shows like Tulsa King and Landman can rest easy, because they're going to be around for a while yet. It also means that his television universe is also likely to continue to grow. The latest example of that growth is The Madison, starring Michelle Pfeiffer and Kurt Russell. Give the man his props; he knows how to attract big talent to the small screen. It's mostly because they know the part will fit like a glove on anybody's hands but O.J. Simpson's.

"Camp is tough: there's the lack of sleep, endless games, mystery meat, twelve thousand questions middle schoolers somehow ask before breakfast, and camp songs that get stuck in your head forever."

One thing I can say about Bad Counselors is that there were a lot of recognizable faces in it. Chris Klein returned to his comedy roots in this film that could potentially be a distant, more wholesome cousin to America Pie. Richard T. Jones of The Rookie fame, along with Stargirl’s Brec Bassinger and Missi Pyle, all star in this faith-based comedy that was surprisingly more entertaining that I initially expected it to be. I’d anticipated a vapid B-movie that would be more cliché than substance, but as it turned out, the film actually had more than one moment of substance. Despite the premise of the frat-boy antics, the story focused more on character identity and growth. The film avoids being overly "cheesy" by leaning into intentional, self-aware comedy, mostly against cringy evangelical tropes. And while the Christian elements are primarily used for narrative quips rather than deep theological teaching, the underlying themes of repentance, second chances, and authentic human connection are very much showcased.

Aussie horror I feel is  a bit underappreciated. There’s typically a charm with a bit of grime when it comes to their villains. Wolf Creek and its lead antagonist Mick is a perfect example. He’s an evil character, but he still manages to be likeable. Another example of this is in last year’s serial-killer-shark film, Dangerous Animals, the villain was once again despicable but still was fun to watch. Another thing I’ve noticed when it comes to Aussie horror: it tends to have a dirty look to it that reminds me of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, where you can almost feel the heat and the dust coming through the screen, and the films also tend to have their characters very isolated from civilization. Penny Lane Is Dead checks off many of the boxes that I like in Aussie horror, and what I find frustrating with it is how close it comes to being great. It’s time to stroll down the  dark and desolate road in the outback and do a post mortem on Penny Lane is Dead.

"Now look, the DA's office just put out a press release saying that boosting from department stores and high-end fashion outlets will be receiving more aggressive attention from their office."

This almost sounds like a soundbite from an evening news broadcast. There has been a national debate about how the law should treat these kinds of thefts. Some cities have taken the approach that they aren't really going to prosecute these kinds of crimes, and that's led to retail outlets fleeing places like that. But that's not really what Boots Riley's latest film is about. It's somewhat based on a song from the writer/director's rock band, but I'm not familiar with the track. The problem is that's about all I really know about the film ... even after I've finished watching it, and that's a problem for me. Some of you will approach this more like an art film, and others will pretend to understand it because they think it makes them look stupid if they don't. And that's exactly what Boots Riley is hoping will happen.

“The oil and gas industry makes $3 billion a day in pure profit, generates over $4.3 trillion a year in revenue. It’s the fourth largest industry in the world, ranked ahead of food production, automobile production, and at $1.4 trillion the pharmaceutical industry doesn’t even crash the top 10. The industries ranked ahead of oil production are all completely dependent on oil and gas. The more they grow, the more we grow. That’s the scale. That’s the size of this thing, and it’s only getting bigger …” 

If Taylor Sheridan does not own a big chunk of stock at Paramount+, then he should be a major shareholder, because he’s bringing in more bucks than everything else combined except for Star Trek. I’ve enjoyed every one of his shows to date, some more than others. I think that Landman has to be the best of them yet. Yellowstone has been the great amber-captured jewel of the kingdom for over five years, but his split with Costner brings all of that to an early end, with the exception of spin-offs. I think I’ve found the new champ, and it’s Landman. Landman is absolutely as good as television gets or has ever gotten.

"I'm Bane. I could kill you, but death would only end your agony and silence your shame. Instead, I will simply break you." 

If there is one arena that I would give DC Comics supremacy over Marvel, it would be with their animated movies. I don’t know why, but when it comes to their cinematic endeavors, DC has not yet broken the mold in the way Marvel has. However, when it comes to their animated endeavors, particularly when it comes to the Batman franchise, DC can’t be touched. And Batman Knightfall Part 1 is no different. As this franchise takes one of the most popular storylines of the series, it perfectly sets the stage for the next installment. However, disappointingly, we won’t get that until late this year, and I predict we will then be craving the final installment, which won’t be expected until 2027. The important thing about the Knightfall storyline is that it introduces two significant characters, Bane (the man who broke the bat) and Jean-Paul Valley, also known as Azrael. This marks the first appearance of Jean-Paul Valley in the DC animated movies. Anson Mount returned to voice Batman for the second time, along with returning Jack Griffo (Tim Drake) and David Dastmalchian (who previously voiced Calendar Man and now voiced the Riddler) and also joined by first-timers Michael Mando (Bane) and Pablo Schreiber (Jean-Paul Valley).

"It's always the same in any orchard. You plant your trees. The trees grow tall. Then sooner or later they begin to get mangled, and before you know it the apples start to rot. And that, Harry, my son, is pruning time."

There's nothing like a good mob drama on television/streaming. Sometimes there ends up being some drama that wasn't quite scripted but gets plenty of a show's attention. That's exactly what has happened with Guy Ritchie's attempt at the long form of television/streaming. This one has to do with the cast. It's a pretty big deal ... unless it isn't. Mobland has had some of the best streaming numbers in the history of Paramount +,  but that's not what brought it to the attention of the news cycle. There has always been talk that Tom Hardy is a difficult actor to deal with. The talk was intense after Mad Max Fury Road when Charlize Theron made some accusations and will reportedly be unwilling to work with him again. No one really gave it much mind, because feuds happen in this business all of the time. But when word came out that Hardy was being fired for the upcoming third season of Mobland, it was noticed.

"Space ... the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Its 5-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before!"

Star Trek: The Original Series finally makes it to high definition. If you’re anything like me, you’ve been waiting for this day for what seems like centuries. They’re here. One of the best features about this set is the multi-angle option. Remember how we were promised all of this control way back when DVD’s first hit the market? We got the same promises when Blu-ray arrived, but we weren’t going to hold our breath. Hey, I still have a red, yellow, blue, and green button on my Blu-ray remote. What are they ever going to be good for? Anyway, we finally have a use for the angle button. You can use it to toggle between the new digital f/x Paramount recently created for the show, or you can watch the original f/x if you’d rather. With that button you now have the ability to toggle between the two. Through the use of branching technology you can go between them as often as you like and never stop the show.