Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 23rd, 2003
Synopsis
In a lush Hawaiian resort, someone is killing off strippers and nude models. Security officerTraci Bingham investigates. You don’t really care about the plot, do you? Because no oneinvolved with this film did. The lackluster investigation fills in time between numbingly dullsoftcore couplings. Bad Bizness even has the nerve to recycle at least one sex scene fromFinal Examination, never mind that it has nothing to do with anything. Fred Olen Raydirected ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 23rd, 2003
Synopsis
Uma Thurman plays Laura, a young woman who picks older men, drugs them, and robsthem. Her little schemes go awry, however, when she starts being stalked. There is more,involving a relationship with a loser played by Paul (brother of Matt) Dillon, but none of it isinteresting. Deeply, deeply dull.
Audio
The sound is, apparently, 2.0 stereo, but it certainly isn’t surround. What it sounds like isextremely muzzy mono. The music is muddy and unex...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2003
So, it’s like a… Space Western?
Having never seen this show, this was the question posed to me by my wife halfway through the pilot episode. Honestly, I wasn’t sure myself. It certainly appeared to be a space western, but the characters were randomly speaking in Chinese. It was drama, yet it was dark humor. This was a truly odd program indeed.
By the third episode, however, we were both hooked. The genius of this show is that it was a typical sci-fi show with one major twist; sitcom-quality...
Posted in: Game Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2003
Crimson Skies had a previous incarnation as a cult favorite PC game of the same name and was in development for a port to the X-Box that was being rushed for release 1 year ago. Thank goodness that they waited because you know what they say…”Good things come to those who wait.” And man, was this game worth the wait! The original version was a toned down, arcade style shooter that would have no lasting appeal. This final version is anything but toned down.
Graphics
Crimson Skies is simply st...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2003
Who wants to see the middle of a movie, anyway? The beginning of the movie introduces the characters and presents the conflict. The ending holds the resolution and the conclusion. But the middle? Who wants to just see the middle? Nobody comes late and leaves early at the Cineplex. Nobody sane, anyway. This is not just any film, though. This is an Epic. Literally everything about this production is huge. The original text of the story was actually so long that it had to be divided into three volumes. The companion fil...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 22nd, 2003
Synopsis
In contemporary New York City, a young man named Edge breaks into an old woman’sapartment. Far from helpless, she wallops him and, at gunpoint, forces him to listen to her tale.She wants him to bury her where she was born. Her story is of two brothers at the start of the 20thCentury: the violent Luke (David Wenham) and the religious Elijah (Joseph Fiennes). A fightover a woman leads Luke to leave the States, and he winds up in Macedonia, a member of aviolent gang of ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 21st, 2003
Roy Orbison’s career spanned 5 decades of music. Predominantly a 50’s artist, his catchy ballads became standards in the 60’s and 70’s. By the 90’s ELO master Jeff Lynne used his skills to give Orbison a tremendous comeback and a new modern sound. Orbison sadly passed away during the peak of this newfound fame and never saw the release of his last hit album.
Audio
There is a great deal of inconsistency in the audio of this DVD. Many of the clips are taken from 40 years or older source tape...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 21st, 2003
Synopsis
Ben Affleck plays the title character, a none-too-bright mob goon ordered to kidnap theautistic son of a federal prosecutor. Jennifer Lopez is the considerably brighter and lesbian mobenforcer ordered to team up with Gigli to make sure nothing goes wrong. Sound like a promisingset up for a romantic comedy? Apparently, the movie doesn’t think so either, as it doesn’t playlike a romantic comedy. In fact, the film doesn’t seem to have to the faintest idea as to what the...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 21st, 2003
Synopsis
A British agent is killed trying to get information back to England, information that mightconfirm or refute the presence of a Russian nuclear missile at a particular location in EastGermany. The British Secret Service, operating on a budget, decides to recruit a Polish civilian,offering him asylum if he will travel to East Germany to find out in person if the missile is thereor not. Much of the film is taken up by his training. Our hero is extremely cynical, and the o...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 21st, 2003
Synopsis
Pauly Shore is a lazy, terminal loser who needs to find a home while his parents are offgetting married. Summoned for jury duty, he seeks out the trial that will last the longest andinvolve sequestering. He lands the trial of “the Drive-Thru Killer.” Also on the jury are hisformer principal and lust-interest Tia Carrere. Let me put it this way: Schindler’s List isfunnier.
Audio
The soundtrack is clear enough, but limited to 2.0 (get th...
