Paramount

What a sordid mess!

Melrose Placelingered in the dark recesses of viewers’ hearts and souls as the guiltiest of pleasures for seven seasons. Wrapping up at the end of its seventh season with a ridiculously clichéd fake death twist for two major characters, the ingredients for it all are here in the fifth season – or the first half of it.

Christopher Titus lands in stores just in time for Valentine’s Day with his most recent concert tour Love Is Evol. “Tonight could fix your relationship, or end it,” he says at the opening of the performance. “Either way, you’re welcome.”After discussing the recent developments of his life with tongue planted firmly in cheek, he backs this opening promise up with nearly an hour and a half of comedy that is equal parts storytelling, punchline, and attitude.

I was first introduced into the somewhat twisted world of Dave Barry in 1986 when I moved to Florida. The Tampa paper carried his Sunday column, and all I can remember is that it had something to do with dinosaurs on the beach and that I couldn’t stop laughing. For years afterward both my wife and I made the column regular Sunday reading. As years went on other things fill one’s life, and I only occasionally read the material until he disappeared almost completely from the Central Florida scene, keeping more to himself some 250 miles to our south. He’s since spent a lot of time playing in a writer’s band with the likes of Stephen King. So I was pretty eager when Dave’s World first came to television in 1993. To say I was disappointed wouldn’t exactly be fair. The show was pretty funny, but Harry Anderson was so ingrained in my mind from his Night Court role that I never did accept him as Dave Barry. Once I was able to separate the character from the writer, the show was a little better going for me.

Anderson supplies narration to the show in a voice much like that of his column so that we’re placed into that world. It was a nice touch. Dave (Anderson) worked from home. He had a wife (Matthews) who was a teacher. He also had two young children. Most of the show dealt with Dave’s childlike look at the world around him. He found life to border on the ridiculous, and that’s what he wrote about. His world was also populated by the typical guy friends that have become staple in shows like King Of Queens and Everybody Loves Raymond.

Who says no one likes a guy who’s negative all the time? Becker has got to be one of the most cynical, grumpy, and negative characters to grace our sit-com screens. He’s a guy you probably love to hate, and he’s also hilarious. Ted Danson spent over a decade behind the bar at Cheers and could have easily called it a career. You know, stop while you’re ahead. Instead he climbed right back into the television saddle and reemerged as Dr. Becker. This time he’s a medical doctor who hates everything and everyone around him. Refusing to display that little bit of a heart we all know he has, Becker spends most of his life complaining about everything. Never before has it been so much fun to watch a guy moan and groan for twenty minutes at a time. Fortunately for him, Becker is truly a dedicated doctor, and while he’s likely to complain about it the whole time, he’ll go to any extreme to help a patient.

The secret to Becker’s genius is characters. Like Cheers before it, Becker is populated with wonderfully distinctive characters played by actors carefully cast for the roles. To start with there’s his office nurse, Margaret, played skillfully by Hattie Winston. Margaret runs things for Becker in his doctor’s office. She’s pretty much his mother and the brains behind the outfit. She’s one of those straight talking ladies that don’t take any guff, and that means not even from Becker. The office assistant is Linda, played by Saw star Shawnee Smith. Linda’s used to getting by on her looks, which is fortunate because she’s naive and a little short on the intelligence front. How she got the job and holds it is anyone’s guess, but her blundering makes for some classic comedy. Becker spends much of his off time at a café owned by Reggie. Reggie is portrayed by Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’s resident Trill, Terry Farrell. There’s a hint of a romantic interest here. Reggie is more interested talking about her own pitiful social life than serving her customers. Jake, played by Alex Desert, is blind, and interestingly enough runs a newsstand out of Reggie’s Café. He’s pretty much Becker’s best friend and often foil. A frequent patron of the Café is sleaze Bob, played by Saverio Guerra. He’s got the hots for Reggie and just about any other woman who meets his criteria (breathing) even though he’s married to an unseen wife. Bob always refers to himself in the third person and is clearly the most entertaining support character on the show. He was a recurring character up to year three where he was finally upgraded to regular. I can’t imagine the Becker universe without him.

The second season of The Invaders saw a shift in the show’s focus. Vincent has started to get his message out there, and some of these people are organizing. There’s no doubt, that if left to continue, the show might have taken on a more resistance center much like Kenneth Johnson’s V mini-series. If you’re looking for a conclusion, you won’t really get it. Vincent’s still out there, and so are the Invaders. Unfortunately, The Invaders only lasted for two seasons, and David Vincent never did manage to warn the world. While he was able to defeat the many tasks The Invaders were plotting, all he was able to do was delay the inevitable. There was a revival mini-series in the 90’s that did include Roy Thinnes reprising his role of David Vincent, but he was not the central character. Instead it was Quantum Leap’s Scott Bakula that took on the job of trying to warn the world and stop the Invaders from completing their tasks. The mini-series was intended as a back door pilot for a new show, but whether it be ratings or lack of network interest, the new series never materialized, leaving the invaders and their plots to dissolve in the otherworldly existence of cancellation. There is some talk that the Sci-Fi Channel has considered at potential show, but again nothing has ever really come of those rumors.

Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not really out to get you. That old axiom has never been more true than for David Vincent in the Martin Quinn series The Invaders. Quinn was best known for his police procedural shows like The FBI. At the time of the The Invaders Quinn was going into the final season of one of his most popular shows, The Fugitive. While most people over the years have compared The Invaders to that Quinn production, they were really not as similar as all that. In The Fugitive the hero, Richard Kimball, played by David Janssen, had a very specific mission. He was wrongly convicted of killing his wife and was on the trail of the real killer, whom he had witnessed. The “one armed man” became an iconic figure in television history and provided Dr. Kimball with his “Holy Grail”. David Vincent’s mission was far more complicated and seldom so cut and dried. He was honestly more akin to Dr. Bennell, played by sci-fi favorite Kevin McCarthy from Invasion Of The Body Snatchers. In both cases you had one man who knew that aliens were invading and even replacing humans. As I watched this collection of Invaders episodes, I couldn’t help but be reminded of McCarthy’s famous scene running down the street trying to convince the world of the impending invasion.

It’s 1980. The Reagan Years are upon you. The country is hopeful it will soon come out of the toilet bowl it was in for the last four years, and while things may seem bleak, you’re one of the lucky ones that still have a job, a girl, and a reason to live. As April becomes May and the days grow considerably hotter a little at a time, what better way to take a break from it all than driving you and your sweetie down to the local movie house for opening night of a new horror film you really haven’t heard all that much about entitled Friday the 13th?

 

If ever there was a release whose title told you everything you need to know, this is it. Yup, the second part of season 5. There you go. Which is in no way a condemnation. Well over four hours of prime silliness is reason enough to pick this up. Unless, of course, you have picked up any of the other recent SpongeBob releases, in which case the curse of double-dipping will likely befall you. Many of these episodes have already been released on the shorter compilation discs. If you held off until now, though, this is a wonderful fix for nautical nonsense junkies.

Audio

“You wanna be where everybody knows your name”

Cheers was that kind of place that songs have been written about. Billy Joel’s Piano Man describes such a place where the patrons are, for the most part, regulars, and pretty much family. In the days before huge screen televisions and satellite networks, Cheers would likely have been considered a sports bar. In those days the sports was more the talk of the place and not merely gathering to watch 127 games at a time. The bar’s owner was Sam Malone (Danson). Sam was a washed up baseball player for the local Boston Red Sox. He was a pitcher who liked to drink a bit too much. So, what does he do? He buys a bar. Actually the character has kicked the drinking and is always seen sporting a bottle of water. At first his bartender was his old baseball coach, until Nicholas Colasanto passed away after 3 years. Coach was replaced by Woody, played by Woody Harrelson. Woody was a farm boy with naiveté and small town charm reminiscent of Radar from MASH. His innocence was often the butt of the jokes. In a strange coincidence, the show’s popular theme song, performed by Gary Portnoy, sounded a lot like Harrelson’s voice, and for years it was believed by anyone too lazy to read the credits that Harrelson sang the tune. The barmaid was Carla, played by Danny DiVito’s wife Rhea Perlman. She reminded us a lot of her husband’s Louie character from Taxi. She was abrasive, sarcastic, and more than willing to kick a guy when he was down. She had a soft spot for Sam, however, and was often protective of him. Kirstie Alley played Rebecca Howe, an on again off again romantic interest for Sam and also on again off again owner of Cheers in later years. She replaced Shelley Long, who played Sam’s romantic interest and barmaid Diane for the first half of the show’s run. The steady customers offered most of the stories for Cheers. Cliff, played by John Ratzenberger, was a postman who spent more time nursing a beer than actually delivering the mail. He often joked about how hard it was to fire a civil service employee. He was a know-it-all and too often bored his comrades with longwinded explanations for even the simplest concepts. His best friend was Norm (George Wendt). Norm was one of the more popular patrons, greeted with shouts of “NORM” whenever he entered the bar. He sat in the same stool, usually griping about his life but unwilling to move off his seat and actually do anything about it. He was married to an unseen wife who worked while he loafed at Cheers. Finally, Kelsey Grammer played psychiatrist Dr. Frasier Crane. You might recognize that character the most, because he got his own show after 9 years on Cheers which lasted another decade. Frasier was the elitist who acted superior to the others but deep down just wanted to be one of the guys.

Paramount has decided to standardize their DVD releases. This goes from everything to the DVD disc art, which is now just a two tone silver on all releases, to the cases. The new cases are a mixed deal. You get 6 discs inside of a single DVD space. That’s the good news. The bad news is that the disc holders are quite brittle and end up chipping and breaking. You save space but ultimately endanger the discs themselves. I hope someone at Paramount takes a look at the packaging and comes up with something a little better. There will also be some inconsistancy with your older sets, and because the final season was already released out of order your middle sets will look out of place. If you’re even a little OCD, you are not going to like the changes.

There was a new Cowboy in Dallas, and he wasn’t throwing touchdown passes. But Walker was almost gone before he could really get started. After just four episodes the show’s production company suffered financial collapse, and the show was rescued at the last minute by CBS Productions, who would continue to run the show for its nearly decade-long run. For nine years Norris brought us the ultimate Texas Ranger in a formula cops and robbers show. The show often became a parody of itself, but maintained a solid viewer ship throughout. Hell, Norris even sings the theme song. Truthfully, what started as a one man show (it was originally called Chuck Norris Is Walker, Texas Ranger) became a good working ensemble that probably kept the train going for so long. Walker (Norris) is a tough guy Texas Ranger. He is partnered with Sydney Cooke (Peebles) and Jimmy Trivetti (Gilyard) who’s an ex-jock with a brain. Walker had a love interest and eventual wife in the local assistant district attorney Alex Cahill (later Walker). Together they fight the evils that come to the high plains of Texas armed with their fists, six-shooters, and Stetsons. After starting with the final season, CBS is finally halfway through the series back from the beginning.

Just to look at it you would think that My 3 Sons was a Disney production. Its star Fred MacMurray had appeared in many Disney films of the 50’s and 60’s and is most likely recognizable from those appearances. Two of the three boys were also known for work with Disney. The eldest boy, Mike, was played by Tim Considine, who starred with MacMurray in Disney’s The Shaggy Dog. Middle son Robbie was played by a former Mickey Mouse Club Mouseketeer, Don Grady. The youngest son, Chip, was played by Stanley Livingston, the only non Disney alum in that group. Another reason for the confusion is the decidedly Disney-like material the series covered. Steve Douglas (MacMurray) was a widowed single parent who was trying to balance his job with that of raising his three sons. Most of the stories involved the warm and fuzzy heartwarming stuff that Disney had pretty much cornered the market on in the films. Whatever troubles arose, no problem was so bad that a heart to heart talk couldn’t fix it. The style would prosper and continue in the form of 70’s shows like The Brady Bunch. The four guys were also joined by Steve’s father-in-law, Bud, played by I Love Lucy favorite William Frawley. That was no surprise, since the show was actually produced, not by Disney, but the Desilu studios.

My 3 Sons was for some time the second longest running sit-com on television. It lasted from 1960 until 1972. The series would undergo major changes as the boys each grew older and eventually married and led their own lives. Frawley would also become very ill after 5 years and leave the show. His replacement, William Demarest as Uncle Charley, is likely better known in the show. The syndicated version of the show often ignored these early black and white versions of the series, opting for the later color ones that featured the Uncle Charley character. It’s very likely you’ve never seen these early episodes as they appeared infrequently in the syndicated markets. The theme from Frank DeVol became pretty popular in the mid 60’s and even entered the pop charts at one time. The show also originally ran on ABC, but moved to CBS in 1965, also accounting for the different syndication packages. It was during that move that many of these big changes occurred.