Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on April 12th, 2007
After watching a bloated Tom Sizemore run around tunnels being chased by a man in a rubber suit while making bad jokes, it’s hard to believe that he used to be in good movies like Heat, Saving Private Ryan, and Black Hawk Down. And that’s probably the biggest impression I got from Bottom Feeder, just another example of the latest “anyone can make a direct-to-video horror movie” trend. My, how far Sizemore has fallen.
The plot is minimal, which is par for the course in most horror films... A burn-scarred millionaire seeks a serum that will regenerate his flesh, so naturally, he tests the serum on the scientist to make sure it works. However, the serum only works properly if it's taken with another anecdote. If not, it will turn you into a monster. And just think, I hate it when medicine makes you groggy. Don't you hate when that happens?
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on February 13th, 2007
A group of former college friends (now apparently weathered by life, though they look as if they are CURRENT college friends) gather at beach cottage for a reunion. Stresses and resentments within the various marriages and couplings quickly put a damper on the weekend, and a desultory evening’s conversation leads to a few members of the group playing the party game that consists in reciting “Dead Mary” in front of a mirror. Inevitably, the evil spirit is summoned, and people start being killed off. Victims have the unfortunate habit of reanimating, however, which leads to mounting paranoia, as no one knows who can be trusted to still be human.
So the rather odd cross-fertilization that we have here is Friday the 13th with John Carpenter’s version of The Thing. Miraculously, an abrupt ending with several loose ends aside, the mix works, thanks in no small part to a strong cast and sharp dialogue that make our group far more believable (and thus sympathetic) than one has come to expect in films of this kind. It ain’t perfect, but it sure ain’t bad, either.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on January 9th, 2007
Victor (Greg Bryk) is one piece of work: a millionaire playboy with a taste for torture and absolutely no regard for anyone but himself. Who wouldn’t want this guy dead? His wife Elizabeth (Kristy Swanson, emerging from the where-are-they-now file) and his lawyer Roman (Josh Peace) are having an affair and plan to knock him off. They poison him, but it turns out the drug only creates a death-like stasis. He is still fully conscious, even as he’s about to be dissected. Understandably, when he regains mobility, his disposition has in no way been improved.
The film is at its strongest during Victor’s pseudo-death, as it gives free reign to black humour, and the initially ho-hum lovers-kill-evil-husband plot ventures into fresher territory. The dialogue becomes quite witty at this stage as well. The first and third acts are rather more conventional DTV fare, though the gore level is surprisingly, and pleasingly, high. When all is said and done, this flick isn’t going to rock anybody’s world, but it is brisk, efficient and bloody enough that one won’t complain about the lost 85 minutes either. Call it rental fodder that actually delivers what it promises.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 7th, 2006
A secret military research base (consisting of boring green-lit corridors and boasting a total staff and solider complement of about eight plus Michael Madsen) is working on a serum that boosts aggression and creates super-soldiers. Used on war heroes, it turns them into raging psychotics, so the decision is made to test it on losers, with the idea that they won’t be boosted quite as much. (Don’t look at me like that. I didn’t write the script.) A group of misfits is hauled in, but they don’t like what they’re being subjected to, and are soon running around corridors, looking for a way out. One of the previous subjects is accidentally freed, and he stalks the hallways as a very economical monster.
The introduction to our losers is actually quite funny, raising hopes that this might turn out to be some kind of torqued satire. No such luck. Just another DTV exercise in hallway horror. Depressingly familiar and tedious.
