Genre

Mascara

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 4th, 2003

Synopsis

Lumi Cavazos had great hopes for her marriage, but now it has gone spectacularly on therocks. Amanda de Cadnet, rather more cynical, is still trying to deal with her husband’s infedility,and one of her responses is to seduce a young student. Ione Skye, meanwhile, is involved withphotographer Steve Jones, whose relationship with his daughter is just a wee bit creepy.

Audio

The sound is 2.0, and barely qualifies as stereo. It is, but only just. T…
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The Valley of Gwangi

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on December 3rd, 2003

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Willis O’Brien, the f/x magician behind King Kong and The Lost World, had always wanted to do a cowboys and dinosaurs film. It is no surprise that his prodigy Ray Harryhausen would accomplish the task. Using some of O’Brien’s design ideas, Harryhausen credibly put these two film icons together with mixed results. The script is certainly not the best Harryhausen had to work with. More Bronco Billy than Jurassic Park, this is more an entertaining film than anything to be taken seriously. James Franciscus does a fine job of playing to the f/x.

Scheme, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 2nd, 2003

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Synopsis

Three losers want to get on easy street. After being kicked out of a blood bank for trying tosell their blood too often, they steal a mail carrier’s load, hoping to score some cash in the letters.Instead, they discover that the daughter of a bible-thumping politician is apparently strugglingwith her sexual longing. They decide to deflower her, secretly film the deed, and sell the tapeto a tabloid publisher. Everything starts to go wrong, not the least of which is the d…
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Chicago Joe and the Showgirl

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 1st, 2003

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Synopsis

London, 1944. Emily Lloyd thinks she’s a showgirl. She dreams of being a big star, orpossibly a gangster’s moll. Serviceman Kiefer Sutherland claims to be a gangster known asChicago Joe, heading up Al Capone’s outfit in London. Yeah, right. When these two meet, theyfeed each other’s fantasies. In order to live up to Lloyd’s image of a gangster, Sutherland letshimself be talked into ever more violent crimes, culminating in murder. Director Bernard Rosekeeps the movie …
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Schlock! The Secret History of American Movies

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 1st, 2003

Synopsis

Ray Greene wrote, directed and edited this documentary. He also narrates, and a fine guidehe is to the world of the exploitation film. He acknowledges such 30s classics as ReeferMadness, but his interest is primarily the 50s and 60s, tracing the post-WWII world of theindependent film, and ending with the 70s, as the major studios moved in on the market and theexploitationers became victims of their own success at challenging censorship laws. The filmis smart, …
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Delta of Venus

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 30th, 2003

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Synopsis

Audie England plays Elena Martin (i.e. Anais Nin), an American living in Paris at theoutbreak of World War II. She has a passionate affair with Costas Mandylor (the poor man’sAidan Quinn), but when he is unfaithful, she leaves him. Desperate for money, she undertakes acommission to write erotic stories for an anonymous collector. So begins her sexual and literaryblossoming.

This is all very high-end stuff, with sumptuous cinematography and jazzy editing. King…
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All the Queen’s Men

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 29th, 2003

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Synopsis

OSS major Matt LeBlanc has a track record of ALMOST successfully completing no end ofmissions. His current assignment: infiltrate an all-female factory in Berlin and steal an Enigmacode machine. His team: a pencil pusher, a geek, and a transvestite. This last, played by EddieIzzard (Chaplin in The Cat’s Meow) coaches the rest of the crew in the finer arts ofpretending to be women. The mission goes wrong immediately when the factory turns out not tobe where it …
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Glory Boys, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 29th, 2003

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Synopsis

Rod Steiger is an Israeli nuclear scientist on a speaking tour of England. He is targeted forassassination by a group of Palestinian terrorists. While the French police manage to kill twoof the assassins, the third makes it to England, where he hooks up with an IRA fixer (who justhappens to be the spitting image of Conan O’Brien). The British Security Service calls inAnthony Perkins to head up the protection detail around Steiger. What follows is a Day ofthe Jacka…
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How To Deal

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 28th, 2003

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Synopsis

Mandy Moore plays Halley, a teen having a rough year. Her parents have just gottendivorced, and her DJ father (Peter Gallagher) is about to marry a weather bimbo. Her best friendhas suddenly fallen in love, her sister is getting married, and she feels very alone. Enter theexaggeratedly cute Trent Ford, who slowly will turn Halley’s cynical heart around. Though everyconceivable teen trauma is bundled into the plot, solid performances, a more mature look at teensexuali…
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Allen Iverson – The Answer

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 28th, 2003

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Most fans of the NBA have strong feelings about Allen Iverson. While some feel that he his the most dominant player in the game today, others feel that he is selfish, a player who is more concerned with his own numbers than the welfare of his team. Iverson is usually embroiled in some sort of controversy, and I suspect that he likes it that way. While it is true that his rough image is probably not what the NBA has in mind as a league player, his talent simply cannot be denied.

This hour-long documentary ha…
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Shield, The – The Complete Second Season

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 27th, 2003

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This is not your father’s cop show. Even if you’re father watches NYPD Blue.

The Shield may just be the show that puts F/X on the map, if it can stay on the air long enough to do so. This is a series that pushes all the boundaries. It features a level of adult language that is comparable only to South Park, fleeting nudity that rivals that of the previously mentioned NYPD Blue, and violence levels never before seen on a network television series. The weekly plots also push the li…
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Once Upon a Crime

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 27th, 2003

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Synopsis

Sean Young and Richard Lewis, two penniless Americans in Rome, meet when they bothhappen upon a dachshund for whom a large reward is posted. They make their way to MonteCarlo to return the dog and collect the reward, but arrive to discover the dog’s owner murdered.They become prime suspects. So do James Belushi, Cybil Shepherd, John Candy and GeorgeHamilton as the various characters cross paths with each other in hotels and casinos. There’s a lotof energy being expen…
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League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Widescreen Edition)

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 26th, 2003

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The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (LXG) might best be described as a Movie of Bizarre Moments. Attempting to blend Gothic Batman imagery with an Indiana Jones cast, director Stephen Norrington shows his relative newness to directing. The film is at times awkward and unbalanced, but overall entertaining and visually impressive enough to justify watching.

The Plot: The story of LXG is an interesting one. A band of miscellaneous folk hero’s and mythological urban characters are brought together to f…
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Willard

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 26th, 2003

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Synopsis

The pathologically shy Willard Stiles (Crispin Glover) lives a life from Hell. His mother isa domineering invalid. (Played by Jackie Burroughs as the most horrific mother since AnneRamsey in Throw Mama from the Train, she resembles nothing so much as NormanBates’ stuffed mother come to life.) His boss (R. Lee Ermey) is an abusive bully. But thenWillard befriends the white rat Socrates, and things begin to look up. Socrates brings more andmore friends into the …
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Mr. St. Nick

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

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It takes a lot to become a true Christmas classic. Mr. St. Nick just doesn’t have any of it. The story of a reluctant Santa Claus was done with much funnier results in the Tim Allen The Santa Clause films. Kelsey Grammer can be a very fine comedic actor as his stints in Cheers and Frasier have more than proven. The problem here is the material is old and tired and Grammer never seems to be able to decide on a tone for the film. I’m a fan of just simple fun, but this film never really takes me on a good ride.
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Law & Order Criminal Intent – The First Year

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

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Law and Order was never really driven by the actors and their roles. The “ripped from the headlines” stories, along with a decision to avoid the relationship clutter of most cop shows, was the defining edge. Note that not one actor or character from the original series’ first season remains. Criminal Intent is vastly different. Dick Wolf readily admits that the third Law and Order series was intended as a modern day Sherlock Holmes. Vincent D’Onofrio was enticed away from a successful film career by the opportunity to create a unique character.
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West Wing – The Complete First Season

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

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Ben Franklin once said that two things one should never see being made are sausages and laws. So far there haven’t been any pilots occurring in a meat factory. Politics aside, Aaron Sorkin has created a first-rate TV show. The real success here is the casting. I’ve always preached to whoever would listen that its character chemistry that makes for good drama. Star Trek was successful not because of the f/x. The character triumvirate of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy was everything. Sorkin appears to know that lesson.
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Cat Chaser

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 25th, 2003

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Synopsis

Ex-Lance Corporal Goerge Moran (Peter Weller) has a fairly comfortable life, if you leaveaside his disturbing dreams of his part in the military intervention in the Dominican Republic in1965. He has a slightly run-down beachfront hotel, and he takes it easy. His past won’t leave himalone, however. Not only does he make a return trip to the Dominican Republic, he renews hisrelationship with Kelly McGillis, wife of a former Dominian strongman. This brutal character isa…
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Santa Clause 2 – The Mrs. Clause

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

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Tim Allan is back as Santa Clause, and this time he is on a mission… to find a wife. The Santa Clause 2 is a good family Christmas tale, and though it is not as effective as its predecessor, it still has Christmas charm and a number of cute scenes. The story is a little flawed, and many scenes rely on childish antics to survive, but those elements add to the family-friendly nature of the film.

Lara Croft Tomb Raider – The Cradle of Life

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

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The Tomb Raider film franchise was based on the popular adventure video game. This second Tomb Raider film, however, owes more to Indiana Jones and James Bond than anything else. Cradle of Life does an excellent job of moving along an adventure story. With exotic locations in Africa and China, Lara Croft has plenty of opportunities to show case her Bond-like bag of gadgets. Critics didn’t like this film much, but then again most film critics don’t seem to appreciate a film as a thrill ride.
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Firefly – The Complete Series

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2003

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So, it’s like a… Space Western?

Having never seen this show, this was the question posed to me by my wife halfway through the pilot episode. Honestly, I wasn’t sure myself. It certainly appeared to be a space western, but the characters were randomly speaking in Chinese. It was drama, yet it was dark humor. This was a truly odd program indeed.

By the third episode, however, we were both hooked. The genius of this show is that it was a typical sci-fi show with one major twist; sitcom-quality…
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Bad Bizness

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 23rd, 2003

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Synopsis

In a lush Hawaiian resort, someone is killing off strippers and nude models. Security officerTraci Bingham investigates. You don’t really care about the plot, do you? Because no oneinvolved with this film did. The lackluster investigation fills in time between numbingly dullsoftcore couplings. Bad Bizness even has the nerve to recycle at least one sex scene fromFinal Examination, never mind that it has nothing to do with anything. Fred Olen Raydirected …
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Kiss Daddy Goodnight

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 23rd, 2003

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Synopsis

Uma Thurman plays Laura, a young woman who picks older men, drugs them, and robsthem. Her little schemes go awry, however, when she starts being stalked. There is more,involving a relationship with a loser played by Paul (brother of Matt) Dillon, but none of it isinteresting. Deeply, deeply dull.

Audio

The sound is, apparently, 2.0 stereo, but it certainly isn’t surround. What it sounds like isextremely muzzy mono. The music is muddy and unex…
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Crimson Skies: High Road to Revenge (Xbox)

Posted in Game Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2003

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Crimson Skies had a previous incarnation as a cult favorite PC game of the same name and was in development for a port to the X-Box that was being rushed for release 1 year ago. Thank goodness that they waited because you know what they say…”Good things come to those who wait.” And man, was this game worth the wait! The original version was a toned down, arcade style shooter that would have no lasting appeal. This final version is anything but toned down.

Graphics

Crimson Skies is simply st…
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Dust

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 22nd, 2003

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Synopsis

In contemporary New York City, a young man named Edge breaks into an old woman’sapartment. Far from helpless, she wallops him and, at gunpoint, forces him to listen to her tale.She wants him to bury her where she was born. Her story is of two brothers at the start of the 20thCentury: the violent Luke (David Wenham) and the religious Elijah (Joseph Fiennes). A fightover a woman leads Luke to leave the States, and he winds up in Macedonia, a member of aviolent gang of …
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