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First off, let me say what a great idea it was to remake this film. The original has enjoyed elevated status far too long based only on an intense 23-minute opening sequence. And as good as that opening piece of suspense is, the same exact premise punctuates Bob Clark’s earlier 1974 masterpiece Black Christmas – so even what When a Stranger Calls does well owes a debt of gratitude to an overall better film. Still, I’ll give the Devil his due – knock-off or not, that sequence stands as an effective, inte...se short film, which carries the baggage of an additional three-quarters worth of movie, poorly executed with a wandering eye from character-to-character that spoils the memories of what was done right in the first place. With that said, let me now state what a missed opportunity this remake is. It fails to an equal extent, but does so in different ways. Director Simon West decides to set his redo in one night using a plot twist, whose shock value has had nearly thirty years to dissipate. Most know simply by watching the previews on TV what the big reveal is going to be, and that advanced knowledge causes the audience to sit through half the film twiddling thumbs. The suspense scenes at the end are well-shot, but largely uninspired… there is simply nothing visceral about this polished piece of lightweight teeny-bopper horror, and the premise itself is spread too thin across the 87-minute running time.

Now I’m going to do something unprecedented. I am going to beg Sony Pictures to remake this film again, and I am even going to give them a way they can do it, make big bucks, and a suspenseful classic (which both incarnations should have been to begin with) at the same time… and I’m going to go on record out of my love for the idea with no vain hopes they’ll see fit to compensate me for the time and trouble. This is a freebie, Sony… take note! The next time you remake this film, use the structure of the original. Act one – the “Oh no, the babysitter’s screwed” moment (also, kill the children). Act two – five-to-ten years later: only this time, instead of having the film float from character-to-character like it has ADD, stick with the girl. Set up her life elsewhere. Have her be someone the killer selected for a reason. Have her as the object of his obsession. This way, it makes sense when he comes after her upon escaping years later. Her living in another location would also provide a plausible explanation for her not knowing this guy is on the loose. Then, make the rest of the act about the killer slowly working his way back into her life, and perhaps even whittling away on the people close to her. Act three – he comes after her. This is where the heroine can really be seen for her strength. Give her something to lose (as the first one did) – perhaps even children, so the killer can break out his famous line one last time. Put her through hell and high water to reach the inevitable happy ending, continue to keep the killer a mystery (NOT like the original interpretation), go for the throat with an R-rating, and release to box office records. I say all this to prove a point: there’s a good film – no, a great film – hiding in the original idea for this story. But while both versions currently out there have strong points, neither puts in the hard work to cultivate the material into something truly special. If you’re in the mood for something similar (that has more punch to it), stick with Black Christmas and the far superior sequel to the original When a Stranger Calls Back.