Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 16th, 2004
The Frightening, as the DVD cover says, is “a new class of horror”. This play on words foreshadows the premise of the movie. There’s a “new kid” at Hallows End High School. His name is Corey (Matt Twining), and he’s having a few problems “adjusting”. Corey has a “past”. But that’s not the “real” problem of this school. Okay…I’ll stop using quotation marks. The major problem at Hallows End High School, nicknamed “Halloween High” (sorry…I couldn’t stop), is that the corpses are piling up. Someone…or som... thing…or some group of things….is killing the students. Who or what is behind these murders? Why are students being killed? It’s just one spoiler note away, or you can just rent the movie.
The Frightening is direct to DVD horror cheese. It’s laughable and not to be taken seriously. The deaths aren’t realistic, as every corpse-to-be (no matter how they die) seems to spurt fake looking blood from their mouths. The acting is mediocre at best, even though Matt Twining has a natural Ryan Phillippe pouty quality. And I guess…a nice bod? This is why (I gather) there are many scenes of Twining, among other male cast members, walking around in nothing else but boxer briefs. The writer, Matthew David Walsh, pulls out elements from a lot of horror movies like The Shining to downright ripping off The Sixth Sense.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 16th, 2004
Film
Ah, Baltimore. The Inner Harbor, Camden Yards, Preakness, corrupt government officials, devastating crime rate, as well as a nasty STD epidemic to boot. You gotta love my hometown. But what Baltimore has in negative traits, it makes up for it with creativity. If you have caught HBO’s The Corner or The Wire, you see that Baltimore’s issues can make for captivating television. While Little Red isn’t on the level of these excellent shows, it does have a certain level of amateur charm ...hat makes up for what it lacks.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 16th, 2004
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 13th, 2004
Synopsis
Michael Vartan plays Tyler Briggs, a man who separates from his redneck family in order to leave the past behind him and start a new life for himself. Following the passing of his mother, his father tries to re-establish contact with him and tracks him to his new home, a secluded beach town where he spent time as a child. Accompanying his father are his law breaking brothers who continue their lawless ways after Tyler decides not to return to their ways. They assault his girlfriend and bruta...ize his town. He then has no choice but to revert to his family’s ways to defend himself and those he cares about.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 12th, 2004
Film
While walking in a junkyard, a character says, “This place has a lot of treasures.” That statement could also be used to describe one of the many powerful scenes that are treasures in this film. Not that this film is anything close to a junkyard. Nominated for a few Independent Spirit Awards in major categories, Tully is a moving film that uses several wonderfully understated performances to tell its story about a troubled family.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 11th, 2004
A miner from the Gold Rush days of ’49 comes back to life to terrorize a group of youngsters. Sound familiar? Yeah... vaguely sounds like that Scooby Doo episode with the Miner 49er. Alas... I’m not talking about Rooby Roo himself. The movie is Miner’s Massacre. And I would advise eating a whole pouch of Scooby snacks before watching this abomination.
Indeed, the movie is about an old miner that comes back to life to haunt whoever takes his “gold”. Of course, there is a gaggle of young kids re...ponsible for the theft. The corpses pile up as the miner puts his prospector’s axe to good use. It’s fairly cheesy. The long dead miner looks like a 500 year old Ewok. The young people are twenty something and fairly boring. But, as usual with these things, there are some sexual situations to pepper the pot.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 9th, 2004
Synopsis
After a museum heist goes awry, Lorenzo Lamas works off his debt to Lance Henriksen bysigning on as part of a team for an even bigger job: stealing $250 million from a 747 in mid-flight. We follow the team of expert thieves prepare for heist, and then the big event goes down.But Lamas doesn’t trust everybody he’s working with, and he is right not to.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 9th, 2004
Synopsis
An ocean floor lab is attacked by intelligent sharks. Subsequently, sleazy oceanographer con-artist Lorenzo Lamas and partner-in-crime Simmone Jade MacKinnon (she of the extremelyshaky American accent) are forcefully recruited by the man Lamas blames for the death of hisfather. They are forced to take Lamas’ private sub down to the lab. Everything goes wrong, andin the wake of another shark attack, the survivors are picked up by a US sub commanded by alunatic. The sub is the headqu...rters of the research that turned the sharks into weapons, and ourheroes must escape both the marines and the sharks.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 9th, 2004
I’ve found a new crime genre: New Orleans noir. I’ve seen a few of these in the past month. The films seem to be about the flawed people of Louisiana (the Pelican State, by the way) and center around steamy murders and love affairs. All made with a certain bayou charm. Tempted is another movie that fits this pattern. It has all the makings of a guilty pleasure.
Tempted stars, Stroker Ace himself, Burt Reynolds as a well known New Orleans business magnate who hires a young stud employee (...eter Facinelli) to sleep with his wife (Saffron Burrow) for a lot of cash. Facinelli has moral qualms, of course, but he is a struggling law student. Why the hell not. Would you do it? Would I? That’s for me to know and for you to find out. Complications arise… seductions, twists, death… you know the deal. It’s all been done before and seems vaguely familiar to Body Heat with Kathleen Turner. Tempted is B movie trash. But the good news is that the movie is not afraid to admit it. I like the honesty.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 8th, 2004
Synopsis
A rift has opened in the ocean floor beneath the Acrtic ice cap, melting the ice andthreatening to flood much of the world. (Never mind that this wouldn't happen: this is a moviewhere we see ice sink, just like in Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea.) The solution,ordered by some sort of world government cabal of the G8 at the "United Nations CommandCenter" (riiiiight) is to nuke the rift. Somehow, this will make everything all better. It turns out,however, that the rift ...as been created by giant intelligent electric eels from outer space (I kidyou not). In the undersea lab Hubris (okaaay) are tough soldier David Keith, ex-wife scientistSimmone Jade MacKinnon, and professional SOB Mark Sheppard. The SOB wants to nukeeverything, but MacKinnon works on establishing e-mail contact with the eels before everythinggets blown to hell.
