Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 23rd, 2004
Synopsis
Bloodthirsty pirate Henry Morgan (Robert Stevens) is starving Jamaica by seizing almostany ship that tries to make it there. He seems impregnable in his fortress on the island of Tortuga.Privateer Captain Bart (Ken Scott) arrives to find some way to defeat Morgan. His journey to theCaribbean is complicated somewhat by the presence of stowaway Meg (Leticia Roman), aspririted...er... wench... who has dreams of being a lady.
You always thought My Fair Lady would...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 23rd, 2004
Synopsis
Andrew Howard is Jon, brutally effective hit man for The Tattooed Man (David Calder). Hehates himself, but loves father-figure Calder, and so he goes about his murderous business,seeking refuge in drug-induced oblivion after work. Then he runs into a old friend from school,is welcomed into his family, is tempted by the sheer normality that he sees there, and begins tofall in love with his old pal’s wife (Geraldine O’Rawe). Hit man and Tattooed Man are soon ona deadly collis...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 23rd, 2004
Synopsis
In 1934, Helena Bonham Carter comes to live with sister Olivia Williams and her husband,Paul Bettany. Bonham Carter is the bad girl, always rebellious, while Wiliams is very proper andsomething of a cold fish. Williams wants to fix her sister up with a man, but she clearly didn'tcount on that man being her husband. Bettany and Bonham Carter begin a furtive affair, whichtakes a sudden turn when she becomes pregnant. Flash forward to 1946. Bettany appears to havebeen killed i...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 22nd, 2004
Deadly Little Secrets has a secret. Shhhhhh. It’s a direct to DVD feature. So the only way you can see it is by renting it. Should you? I dunno. It’s a B movie with a B movie plot, but with pretty good technical components.
The plot starts off with a murder, and the brother (of course) has to get to the bottom of it. Craig Sheffer plays the brother, and he’s bland in a beefcake main character sort of way. There’s a really bad doctor (Dylan Walsh) who is injecting football players with letha...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on March 22nd, 2004
What do a string of prostitute murders, lesbian vigilantes, a sexually confused cop, a senate race, a prominent prosecutor turned law professor, and a law school dropout have in common? After watching Pendulum you will be asking the same questions. Seldom have I seen a more disjointed collection of clichés and bad acting in one film outside of an Ed Wood film festival. Rachel Hunter might have been a gorgeous supermodel but like so many before her she’s just not believable here. Many of the aforementioned sins might ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on March 22nd, 2004
The 1970’s and 80’s brought a ton of teenage angst films where coming of age simply meant having sex. Just One Of The Guys attempts to be a bit more original, but while the premise was, the film is certainly not. I know there was a bit of a cult following for the film, but it was mostly lost in the barrage of superior films of the year. It’s no wonder that Columbia saw fit to release this disc with so little care. Fellow herpers will take delight in one character who brings in a different reptile to school each day. ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 22nd, 2004
Synopsis
Though not Blake Edwards’ best films, these are the movies with which he is most stronglyidentified, and the role of Inspector Clouseau was a career-defining move for Peter Sellers. Attheir best, the movies are fine exemplars of inspired slapstick.
The Pink Panther started it all off, and no one knew what a phenomenon Clouseauwas going to turn out to be. Edwards and Sellers (the trivia track informs us) rewrote the partlate in the game to turn the character i...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 22nd, 2004
Brother Bear is the story of a boy who becomes a man by becoming a bear. Kenai (Joaquin Phoenix) is a young man set on revenge against a bear he feels is responsible for his brother’s death. Going up against the beast and winning the battle, the great Spirits who guide Kenai transform him into a bear himself. As Kenai tries to undo the spell placed on him by the spirits, he meets Koda (Jeremy Suarez) a young cub who was separated from his mother. As the story unfolds Kenai becomes more find of Koda and “adopts...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 20th, 2004
A couple of years ago, my wife and I found ourselves watching an episode of The Lizzie McGuire Show on a lazy Saturday morning, when nothing else was on. While we are certainly not the target market, we were both pleased to find that the half-hour was genuinely entertaining. Saturday mornings are a perfect time to watch this show, as it is mildly humorous, yet still benign enough that you don’t really have to get your brain working to enjoy it. It has since become a fairly-regular part of our weekend routine.< ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 20th, 2004
Synopsis
In 1973, a group of Young, Beautiful People are on the way across Texas to a rock concert.They pick up a hitch-hiker: a terrified young woman who commits suicide when she thinks she isbeing driven back to the place she just fled. Seeking help in a nearby house, our heroesunfortunately come into contact with Leatherface and his clan, and the slaughter begins.
Though there are some variations, the plot, in is broad lines, is very close to the 1973original. And therein...