AVC MPEG4

You know you're in a lot of trouble when a movie opens up with the wedding of two dogs. Hi, I'm Baby. I'm the German Shepherd who runs security here at Upcomingdiscs. If you work for either UPS or Fed Ex, no introductions are necessary, and that spells R U N. I want to know why it is that you humans think that dogs want to look and act like people. We don't need no stinkin' sweaters. We don't want to walk on our hind legs. And we don't want to get married.

Character studies. They might be the most misunderstood movies in the business. Those who do understand them love them when they're done right. When the perfect balance of performance and direction create dynamic moments through character and to a lesser extent the story, we get pretty excited. I watched Stone recently, and I got pretty excited. But that's not the experience a lot of folks had. Perhaps because the film had a limited release in just over 100 theaters nationwide, the idea that it was an art-house or festival film might have put the mainstream folks off a bit.

Charlie Babbitt (Tom Cruise) is a self-centered dealer in exotic cars. He imports high-end sports cars into the states and sells them to the highest bidder. Within the first 10 minutes, we learn that he is not above bribing the EP for the cars to pass emissions, that he treats his girlfriend poorly, and that his father has just passed away. As he goes to the reading of the will, hoping for a big payday, his father leaves him only a car.

Westerns are typically fun movies to review because they usually don’t deviate much from a basic formula. There is usually a criminal, and there is usually a good guy out there to shoot that varmint. Technically, that is all there is to it. Furthermore, the budget (unless big stars are involved) is small, making for some creative storytelling. Today, we get to review an Australian western: Red Hill. Let’s see if it differs from the typical American one.

Vampires are real. There are millions of them out there. They might drink a little blood, but they're also quite fond of milkshakes and french fries. They don't usually haunt the local cemeteries at midnight because they often have curfews. They don't spend their days lying helpless in coffins deep in hypnotic slumber. They save those hypnotic states for uncomfortable desks. You can't scare these creatures with garlic or a crucifix. They're far more frightened of homework and detention.

"This used to be a gentleman's game."

I must confess that I had not even heard of the comic book titles created by Warren Ellis and Cully Hamner. I think that might have been one of the best things that could have happened to me as I sat down to watch the film Red. With a cast this strong, there was little doubt that they would provide a powerful stamp on these characters. No insult intended toward the graphic novels, but I can't imagine these characters any other way now.

"If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't. And contrariwise what it is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would be, you see?"

To be perfectly honest with you, I have never read either of the two Lewis Carroll books on which this film has been based. Under ordinary circumstances, that would put me at a decided disadvantage in both watching the film and certainly in providing an insightful review of the movie.

When a film is successful enough, it’s a relatively natural assumption today that a sequel will follow. In that sequel we expect more of the same and hopefully something new as well. Unfortunately, there is a disturbing sideline for the animation sequel. Because the actors aren’t really on camera at all, there is the temptation to replace them so that you can do a much cheaper, often direct-to-video sequel.

"Hello. I want to play a game."

Like the Beatles used to sing, when Jigsaw says hello, most folks are about to say goodbye. Jigsaw might very well be dead, but his legacy is alive and thriving. If you don't know who Jigsaw is by now, this might not be the best place to start. He's the Rube Goldberg of horror movies.

"He paws fiercely, rejoicing in his strength and charges into the fray. He laughs at fear, afraid of nothing. He does not shy away from the sword. The quiver rattles against his side, along with the flashing spear and lance. In frenzied excitement, he eats up the ground. He cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds."

Disney has a grand tradition of putting out a certain kind of sports film. You know the type well.