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Mr. & Mrs. Smith

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 24th, 2005

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John and Jane Smith are a seemingly happy couple. They live a pretty normal but almost mundane existence of shared meals, kissed farewells and chats about the color of their curtains. They even go to therapy together, purportedly to iron out their differences. It turns out, however, that they have a lot more in common than they both realize. You see, they both have secret lives—they are both assassins. We’re not talking some street-punks you might hire in a bar, or leather coat wearing mafia hit-men, they are the bes…
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Event Horizon (Special Edition)

Posted in News and Opinions by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2005

Paramount Home Entertainment will release the Special Edition of the Sam Neill / Laurence Fishburne sci-fi horror Event Horizon on April 18th. This disc will feature a new anamorphic widescreen transfer along with an English Dolby Digital 5.1 audio track. Extras will include a five-part making-of documentary, deleted/extended scenes, concept art, behind-the-scenes featurettes, and more.

Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2005

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Inspired by the 1936 anti-marijuana propaganda film, Reefer Madness is a musical by Showtime. The film stars Steven Weber as Jack, Ana Gasteyer as Mae, John Kassir as Ralph, Amy Spanger as Sally, Neve Campbell as Miss Poppy, and Robert Torti as Jesus. The film was a pretty fun watch especially if you enjoy musicals.

Directed by Andy Fickman from the screenplay by Kevin Murphy & Dan Studney based on their musical stage play, the three men also serve as the film’s executive producers. Reefer Madness< ...
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Burn!

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2005

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Burn! stars Marlon Brando as a British warmonger named William Walker, who’s a master manipulator and politician, as well as an excellent military strategist. While not one of the master’s best films, his presence really elevates the material and carries the other performers. Funny thing about Brando… he could play a Brit, an Irishman, and a mafia godfather and make you believe he was the nationality he was portraying.

Through the controversies of Brando’s later career (in which he also made …
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Dark Corner, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2005

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Synopsis

Mark Stevens is a PI recently out of jail after having been framed for manslaughter by his former partner. He is trying to make a new start in a new city, and the good news is that something might be developing with his new secretary, Lucille Ball. The bad news is that he’s being followed, and it turns out his treacherous ex-partner, Kurt Kreuger, is in town and making life hell for him. Or is he? In fact, obsessive gallery owner Clifton Webb is setting Stevens up for another frame.

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AVP – Alien Vs. Predator

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2005

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Written by Clayton Self

Alien vs. Predator had mixed reviews upon its initial release in theatres. Fox studios demanded a PG-13 rating (to gain a wider audience) and two weeks before the release, cuts were made to reduce the amount of human blood onscreen, and a few moments of character moments. This new, un-rated edition restores some of those cut scenes, adding just over 8 minutes of previously unseen footage.

So, what’s new? The alternate beginning, also available on the first DVD release is included in the unrated …
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Cheaper by the Dozen

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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This remake ofCheaper by the Dozen, like the original, focuses on the Baker family. Father Tom Baker (Steve Martin) and mother Kate Baker (Bonnie Hunt) decided to have 12 children. The children range from 5 years old to 22 years old. Nora (Piper Perabo) is the oldest child and the one who lives outside the home. Tom coaches Division III football at the small Lincoln College. When Tom’s old teammate Shake Maguire (Richard Jenkins) shows up to offer Tom a big fat contract to coach Division I at Illinois Poly Uni…
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Perfect Man

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Jean Hamilton, after having a bad relationship, decides to move to New York City with her two daughters. We quickly learn that this particular mother feels the need to move after EVERY bad relationship. The whiny eldest daughter gets sick of it, so she decides to set up her mom with an imaginary guy so she can get her mother on the possible right path.

The Perfect Man is the type of film that you watch once and literally cry through. No, it’s not the type of film that you cry because it is really s…
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Womb Raider

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Cara Loft (geddit?) is enticed by Dr. Scrotus (har!) to complete her dead father’s quest, and travels through desert and jungle in the quest to reunite “the legendary womb idols of creation.” she is shadowed by Natasha, an equally hot-bodied spy who (surprise, surprise) has the hots for her.

I can’t believe a summary was necessary. Anyway, this looks like what would happen if writers of fan fiction were given a camcorder and a travel budget. Lauren Hays can pass visually for Lara Croft, and kudos for a real attempt at creating a sense of exotic locations and sets.
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Lords of Dogtown

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Synopsis

According to some reports, Fred Durst almost directed this thing, and if I ever wind up supporting anything Fred Durst does, I’ll kill myself. Having said that, Lords of Dogtown is a fond look back at the California skateboarding explosion in the late ‘70s. Since, like everything else, timing is everything, this film was largely neglected in a lot of circles, because it came out shortly after the outstanding documentary Dogtown and Z-Boys, which was written and directed by Stacy Peral…
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Catch Me If You Can

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Synopsis

One of the first scenes in Out of Sight was the main character robbing a bank using only his words. That same kind of knack for thinking quickly under pressure is employed in Catch Me If You Can, which tells the story of Frank Abagnale Jr. (Leonardo DiCaprio), who, after witnessing the end of the marriage of his parents (Christopher Walken and Nathalie Baye), decides to flee, and begins to bounce checks. Not only does he bounce over $2 million in checks, but he also impersonates a tea…
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Kiss of Death

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Synopsis

Victor Mature is an ex-con driven by financial desperation to take part in a jewel heist. The job goes wrong, and he is nabbed. He’s sent to prison, and agonizes over his family. When he’s double-crossed by his lawyer, he agrees to DA Brian Donlevy’s deal and testifies against psychotic hoodlum Richard Widmark. He gets out, and starts his life over, but then Widmark beats the wrap, and is on the prowl for revenge.

Mature is the star, and Coleen Gray is the eternally patient love in…
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Rainmaker, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 21st, 2005

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Synopsis

During the crippling drought of the 1930s, con man Burt Lancaster arrives in a small town, promising to make it rain (for, of course, a small remuneration). Present here too is Katharine Hepburn, apparently doomed to spinsterhood. She will blossom under the care of Lancaster’s charming rogue.

Though very open and energetic, the film’s stage origins are apparent in the lengthy monologues and frequently artificial construction of the scenes. But Lancaster and Hepburn attack their rol…
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Imagining Argentina

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 21st, 2005

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The year is 1976. Buenos Aires, Argentina. A ruthless dictatorship has just begun, where people who speak out against the government are “disappeared.”

One of the “disappeared” is newspaper columnist, Cecilia Rueda (Emma Thompson). Her recent column denounces the government for kidnapping some young men who were in a disagreement over a bus fare. When her husband Carlos (Antonio Banderas) returns home and can’t find her, he goes to the police only to receive little help.

In what could be the film…
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To Live and Die in L.A.

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 20th, 2005

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If your first introduction to William L. Petersen is through CSI, then you’re missing some real treats with his short-lived film career, which burned brightest about fifteen years before he ever became Gil Grissom and investigated his way onto our small screens and, subsequently, into our hearts. Both of his cinematic outings never got the respect due them until after Petersen reminded us he was still alive, still well, and still acting. His best effort was Manhunter, Michael Mann’s adaptation of the Th…
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Phone

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 19th, 2005

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Phone director Byeong-ki Ahn admits he wanted to take the premise of Ringu and incorporate cell phones as the primary transmitter of terror instead of VHS tapes. (Just when these vengeful spirits will make the jump to DVD is uncertain — and when they do, will it be Blu-Ray or… oh, I’ll save it for another time.) Anyway, he puts together an impressive-looking package with this horror tale, but unfortunately, the film itself falls flat on the wings of derivative, copycat storytelling.

Ji-Won H…
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War of the Worlds (2005)

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 19th, 2005

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Ray Ferrier (Tom Cruise) is a middle-aged divorcee with a blue-collar job and a rundown home in the New Jersey suburbs. When his ex-wife unexpectedly drops his estranged kids—ten year old Rachel (Dakota Fanning) and sixteen year old Robbie (Justin Chatwin)—off for the weekend, Ray is less than pleased. He’s always struggled with his parental duties, but now finds it increasingly difficult to communicate with his children. However, events beyond his control are about to force Ray to come to terms with his responsibili…
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Saturday Night Live – The Best of Chris Farley (UMD)

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 19th, 2005

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Dear Chris Farley, we har’ley knew ye.

What is it with SNL and untimely death? I am pretty surprised that I have never seen a “conspiracy theory” written out about this, like the Wheaties curse or the curse of the Sports Illustrated cover. Jim Belushi, Phil Hartman, Gilda Radner and even the lovable Chris Farley died way before their time.

Farley had an uncommon gift of successfully being portly, sweaty, clumsy and lovable all at the same time. The assortment of Saturday Night Live skits collected here drives this point home with ease.
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The Weather Man

Posted in News and Opinions by Archive Authors on November 18th, 2005

Paramount Home Entertainment will release the most recent recent Nicolas Cage film The Weather Man on January 31st. Available in separate anamorphic widescreen and fullscreen versions, each will feature Dolby Digital 5.1 audio, five featurettes (“Extended Outlook: The Script,” “Relative Humidity: The Characters,” “Forecast: Becoming a Weatherman,” “Trade Winds: The Collaboration” & “Atmospheric Pressure: The Style and Palette”), as well as the theatrical trailer.

House Where Evil Dwells

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 18th, 2005

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The next time you’re at the neighborhood Best Buy, find the packaging for The Grudge. Then, seek out an obscure new release of an old catalog favorite named The House Where Evil Dwells, and line up the boxes. You’ll be struck by how eerily similar the packaging is. Struck enough to turn them over and compare synopses. After doing so, you will notice not only is the packaging similar, but also the plotlines themselves.

Add to the mix the fact House is an early eighties horror film, and…
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Coach Carter

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 18th, 2005

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In the poor area of Richmond, California, Ken Carter takes charge as a basketball coach, and fights his way to transform a team of rowdy boys into a team of accomplished men. Based on a true story.

There are way too many problems with COACH CARTER to call it great, but it certainly has its heart in the right place at the right time. The very first immediate problem is the script of the film. A lot of the dialogue feels like it has been overly simplified for its audience. Almost all of the actors play stock…
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Bridge Too Far, A

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 18th, 2005

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Synopsis

Operation Market Garden is the most famous Allied defeat in the Second World War. An audacious plan scuppered by bad luck and worse decisions, it is recounted in this visually spectacular film. The goal is to seize a group of bridges across Holland, culminating in the brdge at Arnhem. Everything imaginable goes wrong. Richard Attenborough’s film stars just about every big name actor under the sun, and his re-enactment has so many extras and so much hardware that one feels he could have convi…
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Two for the Money

Posted in News and Opinions by Archive Authors on November 14th, 2005

Universal Home Entertainment will release the recent Al Pacino & Matthew McConaughey thriller Two for the Money on January 17th. This disc will be presented in a 2.35:1 anamorphic widescreen tranfer, along with English & French Dolby Digital 5.1 audio tracks. Extras will include an audio commentary (by writer Dan Gilroy and director DJ Caruso), deleted scenes (with optional commentary tracks by Gilroy and Caruso), two featurettes (“Insider Interview: The Real Brandon” & “The Freeroll: The Making of Two fo…
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Kingdom of Heaven

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 14th, 2005

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Written by Clayton Self

Kingdom of Heaven is a handsome epic by Gladiator director Ridley Scott. It is an underrated film due to a less than successful theatrical release, but at closer examination, this film is a deeply important tale of courage, faith and self-sacrifice. It focuses on a relatively lesser-known period of the crusades, when peace was trying to be made between Christian and Muslim.

Orlando Bloom stars as Balian, a blacksmith in a French village, who has just lost his wife and child. Balian was …
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Office Space

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 14th, 2005

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Written by Clayton Self

The cult classic “Office Space” from creator Mike Judge (Bevis and Butthead) found a huge following on its initial release on DVD. The movie stars Ron Livingston as Peter Gibbons, a software analyst for the computer giant Initech. Fed up with his condescending boss (Gary Cole) and the frustrations of his job in general, he visits a hypno therapist who puts him in a state of well being and relaxation. The therapist dies of a heart attack before the procedure is complete, leaving Peter permanately care free. Peter …
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