Posts by Gino Sassani

Something strange happened to me this week. I had two particular films arrive that I was to review. Stardust and Underdog. I expected to love one of them and basically tolerate the other. If you’ve read my recent Stardust review, you already know which was which. I expected to love Stardust and ended up hating it. I expected just a lot of silly nonsense from Underdog, and that’s what I got, except I had a great time watching it. The film is far more entertaining even to adults than I ever could have imagined.

The defendant is charged with impersonating a classic movie, Felony murder of 81 minutes of human life, grand larceny (after review of the film’s sales figures this charge has been reduced to petty larceny), and aggravated assault to my intelligence. The court will show that director Victor Garcia did willfully and with malice and forethought create a sequel to an inferior remake of a classic motion picture. The evidence will clearly show that the film lacks any tangible resemblance to the original film and therefore has fraudulently engaged in a plot to lure the original film’s fans to the video store with false promises of quality and entertainment.

The United States is a young nation compared to most places on the Earth. Our history only recently broke the 200 year mark. Sure, there’s plenty of colonial history you can include, but taken all together you still can’t get more than about 500 years out of the deal. That means Indiana Jones or Laura Croft won’t be spending a lot of their time working their way through New Jersey any time soon. So leave it to the likes of director Jon Turteltaub, producer Jerry Bruckheimer, and star Nicholas Cage to bring us a romp through historical places, and yes, American tombs, in search of the ultimate treasure.

In 1959 Rod Serling changed the face of television. This unimposing thin man stepped in front of a camera and told us we were entering a world of shadow… the Twilight Zone. The anthology series ran for 5 years and included some of the best genre tales ever told. We all have our favorites, and my list is too long to go into here. Even years after when Serling himself had passed it never truly died.

Long before Clint Eastwood was making our day as Dirty Harry or even roaming the badlands without a name for Sergio Leone, he was working the cattle drive on Rawhide. Rawhide was created to take advantage of the huge Western film and television wave that Hollywood had been riding for nearly a decade. With huge ratings for Gunsmoke and Bonanza among others, Rawhide was a bit of an unlikely success. Here the show explored the West on an endless cattle drive to get a few thousand steer to market.

Gomer Pyle began life as a one of the down home residents of Mayberry, where Andy Griffith held court as the sheriff and Don Knotts blundered his way to fame and fortune. It’s no small task indeed to find a way to shine as a minor character who wasn’t even there from the beginning; he replaced Floyd after the second year. But shine he did. Much of the character’s charm and success has to be given to Jim Nabors. The shy naive Gomer worked as an auto mechanic in Mayberry, but for his own series he appeared in one of the most unlikeliest of places, the U.S. Marine Corp.

Frasier was another one of those unlikely hits. Frasier started as an intended one-off character on the hugely popular Cheers. Kelsey Grammer made the most out of it, and before long he was one of the regular barflies inhabiting a stool at Sam’s. In Cheers the wit worked because Frasier was so unlike his fellow characters. He was a sophisticated, almost snobbish psychiatrist with a taste for fine art and high class entertainment. Instead of a ballgame, Frasier was more at home at the opera or an art opening.

When Lost began its third season last fall I was beginning to feel a lot like the castaways must have felt; namely I was getting pretty lost watching Lost. There’s been a lot of mostly fair criticism about how ABC has handled the show last year. The first mistake was to air a small portion of episodes in the first couple of months and finish the season after the New Year. While this broken season plan works well for some cable shows like Monk, it does a serious disservice to Lost.

Dr. Mark Sloan first appeared in The It Never Entered My Mind episode of Jake And The Fat Man. In that episode Sloan was accused of a murder, and it was up to Jake and Jason to prove his innocence. The character had a certain charm that appeared to carry with audiences, and two years later Sloan had his own show, Diagnosis Murder. Dick Van Dyke did for doctors what his good friend Andy Griffith did for lawyers as Matlock. Both traded on their earlier careers in trademark comedies to reimagine dramatic roles in their twilight years.

Avast ye mates, Jack’s back, and did ye ever doubt the return of Cap’n Jack Sparrow? Johnny Depp once again transforms himself like no other actor in Hollywood can. It doesn’t hurt that he wears the persona of Jack Sparrow with the ease of a well worn favorite hat. In this case it be the unmistakable chapeau of Disney’s favorite pirate. At World’s End is the third and final entry in the Pirates Of The Caribbean trilogy. If and when we’ll ever see Sparrow again is anybody’s guess, but I’d lean toward the likelihood that he will return, albeit not that soon and with an almost completely new supporting cast.