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What do a messy divorce and a clan of flesh eating cannibals have in common? Well, in both cases someone gets their heart eaten out. They also share plot points in Offspring. Lionsgate brings back their popular Ghost House Underground series from last October. The series title likely borrows a bit from the old Grind House Theater that Quentin Tarantino brought back to fashion in the last couple of years. I assume it is intended to denote a horror film that skirts the art house scene. So, how does Offspring fit into that mold?

“On the full moon of the seventh lunar month, the gates of Hell open and the spirits of the dead are freed to roam among the living” – Chinese Myth.

I wonder if there’s a roaming charge on that plan. Lionsgate brings back their popular Ghost House Underground series from last October. The series title likely borrows a bit from the old Grind House Theater that Quentin Tarantino brought back to fashion in the last couple of years. I assume it is intended to denote a horror film that skirts the art house scene and Seventh Moon certainly fits that description.

My history with romantic comedies is not a good one. Okay, I cried at the Notebook. *Looks nervously at the man card floating in his wallet*. So, what I cried at Rocky and Bloodsport too. I feel better now. But normally, I look at romantic comedies and want nothing to do with them. But every once in a while, along comes a romantic comedy with a decent cast and a somewhat different story. Even though I can see the ending coming a mile away, hopefully the journey there is interesting and thoughtful.

Of the many films based on books by prolific writer Stephen King, Misery ranks near the top. Falling somewhere between the horror and thriller genres, this film about a twisted obsession is frightening because the premise seems very real.

Directed by Rob Reiner (A Few Good Men), who first visited King territory with his 1986 film Stand By Me, Misery tells the story of romance writer Paul Sheldon (James Caan, Elf) and the fan who rescues him after a car accident.

“Magic Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?”

Years ago a news magazine, I don’t remember which, conducted a survey. They discovered that more adults knew the names of the 7 Dwarfs than could name 7 figures in the federal government, including President, Vice-President, Senate, House of Representatives, and The Supreme Court. They say our educations begin very young. Well, since 1937 our youths have been entertained

“For more than 150 million years dinosaurs roamed every corner of the planet. Only a very few left evidence of their existence, their fossilized bones. And, those bones have never ceased to fascinate us.”

The box art to the new IMAX Blu-ray release of Dinosaurs Alive is more than a little bit misleading. The package elicits an image of thundering prehistoric beasts engaged in all sorts of primeval activities. And why not? It’s the stuff of our youth’s imaginations. Has there ever been a more fascinating true story than dinosaurs? But, if you’re expecting, or worse hoping, to get a high definition experience somewhat akin to the Walking With Dinosaurs specials, you’re apt to be more than a little bit disappointed.

“In the future, a computer program called Skynet will declare war on the human race. Machines have traveled back in time taking human form to terminate John Connor, the future leader of the resistance; Sarah Connor, John’s mother, teacher, and protector; Cameron, a terminator reprogrammed to defend them at all costs; Derek Reese, John’s uncle and a commanding officer with the resistance. Together they fight to stop Skynet from ever being created. The battle for our tomorrow starts today.”

Well actually, to be perfectly honest, it started back in October of 1984 with the release of James Cameron’s blockbuster Terminator. It was the story of a future Armageddon

Wallace and Gromit is the brainchild of animator Nick Park. The British filmmaker tried for years to bring his clay creations alive, but on his own finished a mere 10 minutes in a little over 2 years. When he met up with Aardman Animations, he was teamed up with the creative talents he needed to make his dream come alive, and come alive these two characters did indeed. They’ve become an overnight sensation in the UK and now all over the world. I was introduced to the characters with the full length feature Wallace And Gromit In The Curse Of The Were-Rabbit. Sadly this “complete” collection does not include that longer film.

“I’m the best there is at what I do and what I do isn’t very nice.”

So what do you do after three successful, if not critically acclaimed, X-Men feature films that brought in over a billion dollars total when you factor in domestic and foreign box office and home video sales? It was getting a bit expensive to bring back such a large and growing in popularity cast. Even if you wanted to spend the money for such an ensemble, it gets awfully difficult to write effectively for so many characters at once. Someone’s going to get the dark end of the spotlight. Hurt feelings aside, you can’t continue to please such a wide diverse group of fans.

This was the final of Miramax 4 martial arts classics released as a collection or separately on Blu-ray. The collection featured some extraordinary action and top line star power for the most part. Zatoichi, for the most part, is the weakest of the four films. It is almost a solo effort by renowned Japanese actor Takeshi Kitano. He participated in writing the script. He is also the director, editor, and star of this rather off the wall martial arts film. The character of Zatoichi has appeared in many films and is as much a part of martial arts culture as Jackie Chan.