Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 23rd, 2005
Synopsis
Angie Dickinson is a single mother of two teenage girls (whom the film very explicitly characterizes as “ripe” – boy howdy, they don’t make movies like this anymore). Money is tight during the Depression, and after a fiasco of an interrupted wedding, mother and brood hit the road to seek their fortune, and before you know it, they’re robbing banks.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 22nd, 2005
Synopsis
In the year 2000, the United States (and much of the rest of the world, it seems) is under the dictatorial rule of Mr. President, and the masses are kept passive with the Transcontinental road race, where the competitors must not only race from the remains of New York to the remains of LA in record time, but kill as many pedestrians as possible. Chief rivals are fan favourite Frankenstein (David Carradine) and the villainous Machine Gun Joe Viterbo (Sylvester Stallone).
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 21st, 2005
The kick in the nuts that was Fame the television series is now the kick in the nuts that is Fame - The Complete First Season on DVD. And let me tell you, it hasn't become any better over the course of time. Based off a film of the same name, this mess of a TV show follows the lives of students at New York's High School for the Arts. Most of the dialogue and situations are beyond predictable, and the cheesy early eighties soundtrack is as green and moldy as a block of Colby left out in the sun too long. As far as the students themselves are concerned, there's Danny the comedian; Julie the cellist; Bruno the composer; Coco the singer; and Leroy the dancer... and all lack the talent these shoddy scripts want you to believe they have.
The teachers fare no better. Led by Debbie Allen, who also handles choreography for the series, these educational gurus mostly seem like they're doing their best Mr. Chips impersonation after watching that far superior film a couple of times in preparation for the roles. In all fairness, neither students nor teachers have much to work with. The scripts are as inspired as a high school kid sacking groceries at the local supermarket. Given the time period in which it was created and the poor results of a limited budget, I kept hoping Fame would turn into a slasher movie somewhere along the way. It certainly has the characterization of one. But instead of seeing these obnoxious actors knocked off one-by-one in gory and satisfying fashion, their runaway personalities just go on and on and on for nearly sixteen hours, making for one of the worst shows in the history of television.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 17th, 2005
In the light of today's world - all the changes that are going on in Iraq, and with hostilities toward America for our involvement being the naturally derivative baggage - I fully expected a piece of anti-American propaganda with Zaman: The Man from the Reeds. However, I was pleasantly surprised upon the discovery that director Amer Alwan, regardless of his political feelings, has instead told a simple, sweet story of love and sacrifice.
Spirituality does play a part of Zaman's character, but keep in mind before any rushes to judgment that Zaman's family is very poor. He and his wife and their adopted son live in a floating village of huts deep in the marshlands of Iraq. All they have is each other, whatever the land supplies them to live on, and their beliefs. The film implies in its presentation of Zaman's family how important one's faith is, especially when it's the only source of hope. But the film does remain blissfully ambiguous in endorsing any one belief system, and opts instead for telling a general tale of faith and love that can appeal to all audiences, who consider themselves spiritual people. While it lacks depth and complexity, its simple nature is refreshing and recommends at least one viewing.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 11th, 2005
Synopsis
G.W. McLintock (John Wayne, True Grit, Rooster Cogburn) made most of his money by being a cattle baron. He made so much money in fact, the film’s fictional town was named after him. How cool is that? But all is not milk and honey in McLintock’s life. He has an estranged wife who does not live with him (Quiet Man co star Maureen O’Hara), and now wants a divorce.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 11th, 2005
Stargate is something of a cult phenomenon among sci-fi buffs. It is so popular, in fact, that it produced not one, but three spin-off TV shows. It is amazing that the big business of the Stargate franchise started with a quirky little film. Now there are some big fans of this movie that will surely have strong words of disagreement for me, but this is really not a very good film. The premise alone is enough to make most moviegoers roll their eyes. An Egyptian historian cracks an ancient code on a strange artifact, and discovers a method by which to travel to the other side of the universe. Accompanied by token military-types, the whole crew jets off to a strange and distant land, where they find an alien slave camp run by an Egyptian god and... oh, what's the point. This is all really just the stuff of a 16-year-old geek writing stories in his parents' basement. The real story here is that, for some completely unexplainable reason, the movie actually kind-of works in an odd action adventure sort of way. If viewers can suspend belief and go into this with low expectations, you might find an exciting flick to fill an afternoon.
For those that wish the story in this action thrill ride made more sense, this disc includes the extended cut of the film, though unfortunately this cut extends the film by only five additional minutes. Still, with a film like this one, every little bit helps.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 9th, 2005
Synopsis
We all know the story, even if we haven’t seen the film. Risk-taking (and potentially criminally irresponsible) documentary maker Carl Denham (Robert Armstrong) charters a ship and sets off for an uncharted island. On board are first mate Jack Driscoll (Bruce Cabot) and Ann Darrow (Fay Wray), the woman Denham has tapped for the lead in his film. They arrive at Skull Island, and before long, Ann is kidnapped and offered as a sacrifice to Kong. The giant ape falls for Ann, and a romantic trian...le of truly mythic proportions ensues as Jack and Kong struggle with each other (and other monsters) for possession of the woman.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 7th, 2005
Synopsis
Three of E.T.A. Hoffmann’s fantastic tales were made into an opera by Jacques Offenbach, and that opera was in turn transformed into this 1951 film by Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger. Robert Rounseville takes the lead as a fictional version of Hoffmann himself. While pining after a ballerina, whose love is being stolen from him by an evil aristocrat, he spins three tales of unrequited and doomed love, where in he falls in love first with an automaton, then a soul-stealing (literally) c...urtesan, and then with a consumptive singer. Light as the music often is, and explosively colourful as the fantastic sets are, there is still a lot of darkness in the film, as befits the subject matter (the automaton story, for instance, is based on “The Sandman,” possibly Hoffmann’s creepiest tale). An entirely sung film won’t find favour with every audience, but this is a very effective transposition to cinema (it isn’t stagy at all), and is a visually unique work of art.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 5th, 2005
Missouri Breaks starring Marlon Brando and Jack Nicholson is an overlooked, under-appreciated western, which succeeds where most films fail -- as first a character study, and last an action piece. Set in Montana, Missouri Breaks tells the story of a fun-loving outlaw (Nicholson) and his comrades (including a much younger Randy Quaid and good old Harry Dean Stanton), who set out on a crime spree as a means of payback against an evil land baron responsible for the death of one of their friends.
eadly revenge is not their first intention, but the stakes are raised when the land baron hires "regulator" Lee Clayton (another reveling work in villainy by Marlon Brando) to teach the boys a lesson. Though Brando does have a tendency to steal every scene he's in, I found it a huge joy watching Nicholson remind me he is capable of more than just O.C.D. eccentricity. His role in the film fits with the snugness and perfection of a glove, to the point that I wish his resume included more westerns than it does.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 5th, 2005
Yes, I dreaded this one like the plague. Call it a pure hatred for reality television. But honestly, after starting these episodes, I found myself lending a begrudging respect to it all. If you're unfamiliar with this enormously popular program, here's a brief education. Home interior designers Ty Pennington, Michael Moloney, Constance Ramos, Paul DiMeo, Tracy Hutson, Preston Sharp, and a slew of others, who have made appearances here and there, get together and help some needy family realize their dream home in just seven days. As if the simple act of building a house in seven days isn't enough to get you watching, they usually pick some family that's been pushed to the limits of what ordinary people can take.
This season of thirteen episodes features quite a few heart-warmers spread across its two discs. The most memorable for me was "The Cadigan-Scott Family," which involved a family of eight children, who had lost their parents tragically. The mother died of complications from heart problems; the father followed shortly thereafter with a heart attack. The family would have been dispersed to foster care if not for the selfless act of the two oldest siblings. Jennifer, 23, and Janice, 21, became legal guardians for the other six children, so the family could stay together. Not even an iron-clad heart could fail to soften at the sight of over 3,000 Livermore, California, residents lining the streets at the show's end for the big unveiling. I'll briefly declare a peace treaty between myself and reality-TV to give this show its due. It certainly knows how to hit all the right buttons.
