Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 27th, 2010
I get this terrible knot in the pit of my stomach whenever I discover that I have to review a Kevin Smith film. I know there are a core of solid fans out there who appear to get the inside joke. It's long been my belief that he must have the best blackmail file in the industry to keep getting studio deals to release films. It's not like any of his films have broken any box office records. Still, he keeps getting work. So, it was with that admitted prejudice and knot with which I approached my viewing of Cop Out. My shoulder had developed this nasty twitch as the disc menu took forever to load. Like a condemned man waiting for the chair generators to come on line, I watched the Warner logo and the FBI warnings slowly resolve themselves on my monitor. Then something totally unexpected happened. It was like that proverbial last-second call from the Governor. The knot disappeared, and the twitching miraculously ceased. I actually enjoyed the movie. It's a miracle of the highest degree. Somewhere some holy dead guy just put in his final miracle on his way to sainthood, because Kevin Smith released a pretty good movie.
Detectives Jimmy Monroe (Willis) and Paul Hodges (Morgan) have been partners for a long time. Nine years, in fact, which as Paul informs us is longer than the life of your average great dane. At times it appears miraculous that the duo has managed to last that long together. They bicker more than an old married couple on their way to Divorce Court on television. To an outsider it might appear they don't like each other at all. But when the chips are down and they get suspended for causing a little havoc on their latest undercover, they have each other's backs. The suspension couldn't have come at a worse time for Jimmy. His daughter wants a $48,000 wedding, and his ex-wife's rich husband is more than willing to foot the tab so that he can rub Jimmy's face in it. So Jimmy does what any father would do to save his pride. He decides to sell a mint baseball card that his late father cherished to pay for the wedding. A good plan. That is, until a couple of punk hoods decide on just that moment to rob the sports memorabilia store. They end up with Jimmy's baseball card. Jimmy and Paul finally catch up with one of the hoods only to discover that he sold the card to a big drug kingpin for a couple of bags of drugs. So, now it's off to confront Poh Boy (Diaz) to get the card back. Poh Boy offers to return the card if Jimmy can trace a car of his that was recently stolen. The car contains some valuable evidence that he wants back, including a witness ,Gabriela (de la Reguera) who has been locked in the trunk for two days. Now Jimmy and Paul need to protect the witness and bring down Poh Boy, with no badges and two of their own detectives trying to pin some recent murders on them. This should be a lot of fun, and it is.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 27th, 2010
"This is Hell, and I'm going to give you the guided tour."
There have been a lot of great prison and prison break films over the years. Who can forget Dustin Hoffman in Papillon or Clint Eastwood in Escape From Alcatraz? Of course, more recently we had The Shawshank Redemption. Lock Up won't ever taste the rare air of those classic films. In fact, it's not really a prison break film at all. There is an attempted break, but it's not quite the focus of the film. I almost felt like I was watching the sequel to a break film. That's because Lock Up deals with the aftermath of a prison break and shows us the consequences on both the escapee and the warden who was responsible for preventing said break. And that's where I think this movie creates its own niche in the popular genre. It's a unique film that might have left its most exciting moments in a past that we never got a chance to see.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 26th, 2010
USA Network has certainly found a little niche for themselves, milking their "characters wanted" run of television shows. It all started with Monk and has progressed through several successful reincarnations of the quirky character-driven shows. In some cases the quirky nature of the characters gets pretty out of control, and while I liked Monk a ton, his OCD was significantly over the top at times. This tends to draw too much attention and minimize whatever might be happening in the episode itself. That's not the case with White Collar. This series has a ton of potential to be the next big breakaway hit for the cable network. There's just enough style to the main character to make him incredibly interesting, but not so much that the exceptional stories don't get your full attention. I don't get to watch that many television shows these days. I'm too busy keeping you guys from making bad DVD or Blu-ray choices. It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it. I'm not complaining, really. It just stands to reason that I will miss the occasionally solid new show to hit the airwaves. Such is the case for me and White Collar. Fortunately for both of us, I get the chance to catch up when the shows inevitably reach the home theater market. Fortunate for me because I do eventually get to see them. Fortunate for you because I can let you know when there's something you might have missed that you need to see. This is one of those times.
Neal Caffrey (Bomer) is an elite thief and con artist. He's an expert forger and is doing four years after finally getting caught by FBI agent Peter Burke (DeKay). With just three months remaining on his 4-year stint, Neal breaks out of prison. Now, what would make a guy escape when he's almost finished doing his time? The answer, of course, is a woman. In this case it's Kate (Daddario) who broke up with Neal on her last prison visit. But, Neal is convinced there is more to the story, so he takes a powder from prison, only to be caught again by Peter. Now Neal is facing another four years behind bars. Fortunately, however, Peter is trying to catch one of his most elusive criminals. He calls him The Dutchman because he's like a ghost. Neal offers his arch-rival a deal. Peter releases him into his own custody, and Neal will help him track down the Dutchman. If the case goes well, the deal can be made permanent for the rest of Neal's prison time. So, ala 48 Hours, the duo track down the crook. Neal ends up talking his way into a multi-million-dollar mansion suite for his new digs. While he helps Peter, he is secretly trying to track down Kate, who is mixed up with a mysterious stranger. Neal only knows him by a pinky ring he's seen in a photograph. The stranger wants something he believes Neal stole and has stashed away somewhere. Neal's investigation hits several snags, not the least of which is an ankle bracelet that only allows him to traverse a 2-mile radius of his home when he's not with Peter. To help out with some of the legwork, he has Mozzie (Garson), an old friend and fellow con artist.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 26th, 2010
There was a time when racial stereotypes on television and in the movies could be very funny. Shows like All In The Family and Sanford And Son brought an entire generation to their knees with laughter. Today audiences are a little more timid when it comes to that kind of humor. This is the kind of movie you end up looking both ways before you think about letting out even the slightest giggle to make sure no one is watching, or worse, training their cell phone camera on you. I don't know about you, but I don't want to feel like my reactions to my entertainment are under a microscope. Our Family Wedding will make you feel exactly that way. It's a combination of the Sydney Poitier and Spencer Tracy classic Guess Who's Coming To Dinner (which happened to also feature Louise Jefferson herself, Isabel Sanford) and the original Peter Falk and Alan Arkin The In-Laws. Both of those films are superior to Our Family Wedding in every way imaginable.
Marcus (Gross) and Lucia (Ferrera) are a young couple who presumably met in college. In spite of their cultural difference (he's black, she's Mexican) they have decided to get married and move to Laos as volunteers. They are coming back home to L.A. to tell their parents of the impending nuptials. Before they can even make the announcement, the two fathers inadvertently meet. Lucia's father Miguel (Mencia) runs a towing company and he ends up towing the car of Boyd, Marcus's father. Of course, at that moment they are unaware that they will meet under entirely different circumstances, namely the dinner engagement announcement of their children. It doesn't take long for the clashes to begin. The families are separated by race and economic circumstances. Boyd is a divorcee who raised his son on his own, while Lucia was raised by a large extended family. The film quickly settles into all of the wedding-comedy clichés. There are the father clashes, the arguments over wedding plans, the police station scene, the dysfunctional family dynamic and, of course, the "let's call the whole thing off" moment. Finally, there is the expected disruption at the ceremony itself, in this case mostly caused by a goat on Viagra. Don't ask.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 21st, 2010
"Don't act like the hypocrite, who thinks he can conceal his wiles, while loudly quoting the Koran." - Hafez (14th Century Iranian Poet)
The Stoning Of Soraya M is based upon a book written by Freidoune Sahebjam. The book is currently banned in Iran as well as other countries. It is based on a true story. The book and now the film have caused quite a bit of controversy over the years. Director Cyrus Nowrasteh is no stranger to controversial topics. He appears to have a flair for significant historical events, and his work has shown some insight into the actual significance of his subjects. His acclaimed Path to 9/11 stood out from the rather large crowd of films on that subject. He brought many of the more subtle observations to the surface. Other films like The Day Reagan Was Shot and 10,000 Black Men Named George explore quite opposite subjects with equal intensity. So it should come as no surprise that he would tackle a subject that has been out there for 30 years when no one else was willing to touch it. It might seem somewhat opportunistic that The Stoning Of Soraya M comes when a planned actual stoning in Iran has made international headlines. And as the international community has expressed outrage to such an extent that said stoning has, for now, been cancelled. Such is not the case. This movie has been in some form of development or another with Nowrasteh and his wife since the 1990's. The film itself was released almost two years ago. The fact that this movie is coming out on home video now is not a matter of exploitation. It can best be described as: It's about time.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 21st, 2010
In Florida we have some very large bugs. There's this one particular spider that is quite a problem in my house. It's real name is a huntsman spider, and it grows to about 16 feet, not including the legs. It sports 27-inch fangs and tends to move the furniture around at night while it stalks its prey. Yes, it stalks its prey at night in my house while I'm trying to sleep. Years ago I coined my own name for these clever, ferocious killers. I call them Rambo Spiders. The name fits these long-legged freaks perfectly as they perform their recon missions throughout our home. When I find them, I terminate them with extreme prejudice. I suspect that if these arachnids happen to be movie fans, they have a name for me, as well. You guessed it: Rambo.
John Rambo was the brainchild of novelist David Morrell. In his novel you'll find a John Rambo who is very much like the one played by Sylvester Stallone, yet quite different, as well. While he retains that one-man-fighting-machine persona, in the book he is much more of a cold-blooded killer than the man we meet in the franchise's first film. In that movie, Rambo disables the police and whoever else stalks him, but he never kills one person in that film. The officer who does die does so because of his own actions, not Rambo's. He's actually a very innocent man, when we first meet him. There's a vulnerability that we see in that film's first five minutes that we never will see again over the course of four films. Credit Stallone for allowing us those fleeting moments that you won't find anywhere in Morrell's book. But it is the Rambo as portrayed by Stallone that has become the cultural icon and household word today. The term is in most modern dictionaries, usually to describe a relentless force of strength, which brings me back to those spiders. And before you animal rights people start writing me your displeasure over my spider kills, understand that it's more than a fair fight. They have those 99 inch fangs, and all I have is a rolled-up newspaper.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 20th, 2010
"Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. We're so glad you could attend. Come inside. Come inside."
The rock gods must have been smiling when Keith Emerson, Greg Lake, and Carl Palmer journeyed from their perspective corners of the music world and combined to form the band Emerson, Lake & Palmer, or merely ELP to the fans. Keith Emerson had made quite a name for himself with his manic organ riffs while working in the band The Nice. Greg Lake was busy with the band King Crimson where he worked with long-time ELP collaborator Peter Sinfield. Carl Palmer was the youngest member of the group and had played for several bands before meeting up with his eventual ELP bandmates. Together they would help to define an entire genre of music. This new progressive rock era would be recognized not by hit singles and AM radio play. Instead this music would be enjoyed for its virtuosity and complexity. In all of the years the band enjoyed success, they've released less than a handful of what the industry defines as a single. Yet, anyone who has ever seriously picked up an instrument in the last 40 years knows exactly who they are.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 19th, 2010
In an attempt to win over more of the male viewers into their audiences, filmmakers of the romantic comedy genre have tried many tactics. To date, very few of them have worked to any great extent. The problem appears to be getting the mixture just right. Too much of the guy stuff and you'll turn away your core "chick" audience. Too little and you're really not reeling in too many guys. Of course, we go anyway to please the ladies in our lives. Just between us, I once found myself at a Barry Manilow concert for a girl. Yes, I'm trying to get some help for that. We'll go. That doesn't mean we have to enjoy ourselves. Hopefully, it's just enough that we go,because no matter how much it tries to be a guy flick, The Bounty Hunter might as well have a neon sign hanging from the marquee that says "Ladies Only, Please".
Nicole (Aniston) is a reporter who is onto a big story, or at least it could be. She thinks that a recent death ruled a suicide was really a murder and that some cops are trying to cover it up. As you might expect, she's not too popular with the police department,and she's also facing a charge of assault on a police officer stemming from a "misunderstanding" between her car and a police horse. When she's ordered to appear in court for the crime,she gets a call from her informant who claims to have info that will break her suicide case, but he has to meet her now. Naturally, she blows off the court appearance to meet the snitch. Unfortunately, the snitch has been snatched by the bad guys,and now there's a warrant out for her arrest. The bail bondsman who posted her bail sends one of his best bounty hunters to pick her up;that'll be Milo (Butler),her ex-husband. For most of the film we have the two ex-spouses playing their own cat-nd-mouse game while the killer in Nicole's case is out to kill her. Then there's the mob boys that Milo owes a huge gambling debt to. Finally, to complete a hat trick of pursuers,there's Stewart (Sudeikis) who is in love with Nicole and decides to "rescue" her from her situation. As you might have guessed, Stewart is going to end up in a world of hurt.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 15th, 2010
The name says it all. With just those four words, you can pretty much figure out everything you need to know about Hot Tub Time Machine. This is very much a party film in the tradition of the Saturday Night Live alumni movies of the 70's and 80's. With the release of this movie, you no longer need to travel back in time to 1986 to watch a film that relies almost entirely on sex, drugs, and rock ‘n roll for most of its situational comedy. The rest gets filled in with your standard toilet humor. I'm not sure exactly when it happened, or who exactly I should blame, but at some point filmmakers decided that the only way to elicit laughter was to gross you out. Before long a sort of Hollywood arms race had started. Each new film had as its primary mission the objective to out-gross the ones that came before. If you wish to measure success on that axiom, Hot Tub Time Machine is a very successful movie.
Meet four guys who are in a desperate need to get a life. Adam (Cusack) has just lost his live-in girlfriend. It seems she took a lot of the good stuff, including the television, with her. Nick (Robinson) was once a promising local musician with a loving wife. Now his wife is cheating on him, and he works at a doggie spa named Sup Dawg removing crap from rich folks’ constipated dogs. Lou (Corddry) is divorced, broke, and alone. While getting carried away listening to a rock song on the car stereo, Lou almost kills himself in a closed garage with the car running. His friends, who really don't even like him that much, had long since abandoned him. Now that they think he tried to commit suicide, they get guilted into taking him out for a good time. Together with Adam's geek nephew Jacob (Duke), they decide to go back to the location of their glory years of youth, a ski camp. Of course, a lot has changed in 25 years. The place is now a ghost-town dump. On the bright side, their hotel room comes equipped with a hot tub. The four guys party hard and into the night. When they wake up, the place is packed and jumping like it was in the good old days of Winterfest 1986. There's a good reason for the change. The hot tub has transported them back to 1986 into the bodies of their younger selves. Their good times are hampered by the appearance of a cryptic hot tub repairman (Chase) who appears to know what's going on. He warns them that if they change anything, there could be dire consequences. Jacob's worried that he might not even be born.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 15th, 2010
Lionsgate has as good a collection of catalog titles as any studio out there. Many of these films have not yet been given the high definition Blu-ray treatment for one reason or another. So I'm sitting here trying to figure out how a trivial film like Ladybugs jumped the line and finds itself in a barebones release on Blu-ray this month. I'm sure that the movie has its fans. Of course, I've never met any of them, but I gotta believe that they're out there ... somewhere.
Don't get me wrong. I love Rodney Dangerfield. He's one of the few guests on Letterman who got me to be sure to schedule my DVR. I don't get to watch such things often, because I spend a large part of my entertainment time watching films for you guys. I know. It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it. Yeah, I laugh about it all the time with my friends and family who have real jobs. Usually, they don't think that one's so funny. Except sometimes this really is a tough job. And, you want to know what else isn't so funny? Ladybugs. It's a bad sign when I find myself laughing hardest at a scene where Rodney's behind a dressing room curtain with Jonathan Brandis, and he's sounding like a pedophile to a shopper who misunderstands what she sees and hears. When that's the high point of any film, you've really gotta question the value of the kinds of things you're watching.
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