Sony Pictures

Honestly, I don’t know what the bigger tragedy is, the fact that John C. Reilly has been a funny performer for years, or the fact that it’s taken guys like Judd Apatow and Adam McKay a chance to show off his comedic talent. For those who don’t know, Reilly was in a hilarious ten-minute blooper reel in Boogie Nights which showed that he could improvise with the best of them. The guy also played Bigfoot in an episode of the Tenacious D show that aired on HBO in the mid ‘90s. But sure, put him in Chicago where he was nominated for an Oscar or in ensemble films directed by some of film’s greatest voices. His true love, that which gives him much joy and pleasure, appears to be when he’s goofing around, like he does in Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story.

Walk Hard was co-written by Judd Apatow, whom you might have heard of. Any R-rated comedy that has been released in the last 18 months to any sort of popular appeal has had some sort of involvement by the writer-producer-director. Jake Kasdan (Orange County) was the other writer and directed the film, where Reilly plays Dewey. He grew up in the shadow of his brother, who died after a tragic machete incident. Dewey grew up and had a hit early in his life, but then went through the usual period of drugs and substance abuse before his career went through a rebirth of sorts. If it sounds like the usual biopic treatment of a musical icon, that’s what it is, and what Apatow and Kasdan manage to do is stick a thumb in the collective eye of films like Ray and Walk the Line, as those films possess a slight precociousness that deserves lampooning of some sort. Reilly plays Dewey as a fifteen-year-old. The guy is over 40, OK? So yeah, that’s funny. When Dewey’s drummer Sam (Tim Meadows, Semi-Pro) shows him what drugs are like, it’s done with tongue firmly planted in cheek. Dewey’s various relationship issues are shown, starting from his first wife Edith (Kristen Wiig, Saturday Night Live) who seems to be pregnant in every scene as she puts down Dewey, to his second wife Edith (Jenna Fischer, The Office), who is a born-again Christian and hopes to get Dewey the same way. Every girl, boy, rock and stick in between is shown too.

ABC has made a killing from the bored housewife situation. It shouldn’t come as any surprise that films would attempt to put those kinds of situations into their plots. The film is billed as an erotic thriller; however it’s really two separate films. The first half works the erotic side of things. There’s plenty of nudity and sexual situations, starting with three chicks all over each other for a photo shoot. Here we meet Claire Dennison (Ford). She’s a successful businesswoman, perhaps selling porn to the Japanese. She’s married to Jonathan (MacFadyen), a psychiatrist that she appears to love. The problem is she wants to have a baby and she’s bored with their sex life. She attempts to spice things up through role playing but gets little response from her work-obsessed husband. One night while out of town in a hotel she spots her husband in a bar playing the part of “Roberto” a role she earlier encouraged him to take on. She plays along, and things get pretty hot and steamy for the couple. The rendezvous is repeated on another trip, and she seems ecstatic with the newfound passion her husband has discovered. That is until one morning she gets a call from her husband while he’s still in her bed. It turns out she’s been having an affair with his perfect double. When she discovers her huge mistake, she hustles poor “Roberto” out of bed and out of the door. Unfortunately for her “Roberto”, really Simon, isn’t planning on going away that easily.

 

Extreme sports, whether it be skateboarding, surfing or skiing have only come into popularity within the last decade or so. However, their roots often go back many more years. Take the case of extreme skiing. That kind of skiing is not usually found in the United States and forces patrons to go off to slopes like Chamonix in France. Origins of the sport suggest that we can go back almost 40 years to find a true source. The documentary Steep tells the tale of extreme skiing from the fathers of the sport and listens to the pioneers creating new and exciting challenges going forward.

Back in 1971, Bill Briggs skied Wyoming's Grand Teton and gave birth to the concept of extreme skiing. His claim, "Without risk, there is no adventure.". However, due to the United States being more partial to insurance claims and protecting themselves from being sued, the sport was forced to move to Europe and slopes like Chamonix in France during the mid 80's. Local types such as Anselme Baud or Stefano De Benedetti led the way with a great show of skill and escaping death. But the sport didn't get recognized here in the United States until Glen Planke came onto the scene. His movie, The Blizzard of AAHHH's and his foot high mohawk brought the sport into the mainstream.

There’s probably a reason why there’s a surprising and varied cast of characters in the independent film The Good Night, and that’s because a familiar last name is involved with the project. Jake Paltrow, son of Bruce and Blythe Danner, and sister of Gwyneth wrote and directed the piece which at first glance might be a pretentious and audacious film, but is a little more interesting than it seems.

Dora (Gwyneth) and her boyfriend Gary (Martin Freeman, The Office) are living in New York, and Gary is working as a musician who does work on commercials, even after he was a one-hit wonder in a band with his friend Paul (Simon Pegg, Shaun of the Dead). Gary’s relationship with Dora appears to be flailing, and he starts to dream of a mysterious woman (played by Penelope Cruz of Volver lore) that he develops an intense kinship with. He then starts to sleep longer in order to spend as much time with her as possible and seeks out a specialist (Danny DeVito, Hoffa) in order to find out how to sleep longer.

Love and marriage, love and marriage, go together like a horse and carriage, this I tell your brother; you can't have without the other... Chances are if you know this song by heart, you have watched a lot of episodes of Married with Children (or you adore Frank Sinatra ). The Bundys are back for their eighth season of marital hijinx. Once it was just a random trivia question about one of the shows that was first on the little known Fox tv channel (Tracey Ullman and Garry Shandling are two others by the way). Later, it went on to be one of the network's greatest early hits and out lasted almost everything except the Simpsons. So would another twenty six episodes of crass sarcasm and dysfunctionality dilute the product or just keep the laughs coming?

The seventh season of Married with Children had introduced us to an unpopular character known as Seven. This character was written as a way to give the Bundys a third child. However, by the eighth season the character had been written off mostly as a failed experiment. The character would later be referenced in later shows as classic wink-wink jokes to those who closely followed the series but nothing more. The eighth season was more of a return to form for Al (played by Ed O'Neil), Peggy (played by Katey Sagal), Kelly (played by Christina Applegate), and Bud (played by David Faustino) Bundy. Peggy tries to make a free-throw for cash and keeps trying to find ways to make marriage bliss with Al. Bud discovers his cool factor in an episode and suddenly becomes a love machine, at least in his own mind. Kelly is still trying to land a sports celebrity or fill up her brain with useless trivia to win a game show. Then there is Al, who spends episodes starting up clubs against women (No Ma'am) or getting his old Dodge up to the one million mile mark.

Dance movies can be interesting especially when it involves hot sweaty bodies and bodacious moves along a club floor. Did I just say bodacious? "Pauly Shore is on line one, please pick up the white courtesy phone". I'll ignore that for now. Dirty Dancing or Footloose are great examples. Some should be drag into the street and shot. I knew that Feel the Noise looked bad the minute I looked at the cover. What was that clue on the cover you might ask? Produced by Jennifer Lopez would be a very good start.

Rob Vega (played by Omarion Grandberry)is a straight up hip-hop rapper who gets shot at one night while he's trying to perform. His mother decides to send him off to Puerto Rico to live with his father Roberto (played by Giancarlo Espositio)and his family. There he meets his half brother Javi (played by Victor Rasuk) and is introduced to Reggaeton, music that blends Reggae and Hip-Hop. The two team up for a single and eventual album as Rob tries to peace back a normal life which eventually leads him back to his home in New York where he has to face his demons.

I couldn’t find her name anywhere on the credits, but I simply cannot believe that Rosie O’Donnell didn’t have anything at all to do with the film Conspiracy. The film is a thinly veiled pot shot at the current administration, or at least Dick Cheney. Gary Cole plays a guy named Rhodes, who is really intended to represent Cheney. Rhodes controls a multibillion dollar corporation that has managed to set itself up in Iraq making millions from the war thanks to corrupt government officials. His company, Halicorp, is obviously intended to be Haliburton. Rhodes has also taken control of a small Arizona border town. Here his vigilante friends patrol the border, turning back, and even killing, Mexicans attempting to enter the United States. He justifies his deeds in the name of counterterrorism, but the truth his he holds the entire town in fear. Enter MacPherson (Val Kilmer) who recently lost his leg in the Marines in Iraq. When he returns home he comes to Rhodes’s town looking for a Mexican comrade in arms. He finds that there’s no trace of his friend, and his questions have drawn all the wrong kind of attention. After some rather silly plot developments, MacPherson becomes a one man army to challenge Rhodes’s control. Apparently someone has watched Clint Eastwood’s Pale Rider one too many times here. Now Kilmer has grown old and rather obese in recent years, so the film needs to take that into account with his fighting style. After all, no one’s going to believe he’s got any real fight in that couch potato body. He wins his fights mostly by being able to duck really well. And returning a bowl of chili he recently ate on someone’s shoes. Figuring that Eastwood scowl was already done, Kilmer appears to be half asleep during each fight. I know I was. He does pack a mean nail gun, and you should just see what he can do with some rolled up paper. When they finally do put some real fire power in his hands, the rest just gets too comical.

 

If you are a regular reader here, you know how much I love Ray Harryhausen. Over the years I’ve had the chance to spend many casual hours with him and his wife. They are both extraordinary people, and I’m always amazed at how modest Ray always acts. After over a half century, he still acts surprised that so many people continue to be affected by his work. I was lucky enough to have been invited by Ray personally when he finally received his star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame. With that said, I’m going to avoid repeating myself and spend less time here talking about Ray. You can see more details of my talks with him and just some great Ray Harryhausen information by looking at my previous reviews.

In 1973 Elton John had his best selling album to that time in the double release Goodbye Yellow Brick Road. From that album came one of the most radio-played non-singles of all time, Funeral For A Friend/Love Lies Bleeding. What does any of this have to do with the Christian Slater direct to video film? Nothing. It has about as much to do with the film as the title itself does. I think someone must have been a closet Elton fan and pulled the title out of thin air, which is about where most of this screenplay must have come from. If you’ve seen Slater’s far better True Romance, then you’ve seen this film. Substitute cocaine for cash, and the story is very much the same. Of course, Tony Scott did it much better. So why would you spend 20 bucks for a cheap knockoff? Good question.

 

The Nines truly is a film that defies description, albeit in not an entirely new and convincing manner. For instance, I could tell you that I just got done eating a chicken sandwich after consuming several mojitos and a beer, and at least with that statement, you could tell what it is that I’ve done, you know? But to be fair, The Nines decides to take on some daring filmmaking and storytelling, and does it in a way that you can’t help but want to watch it again, even a little.

Written by John August, who had been notorious for penning such films like both Charlie’s Angels films and several Tim Burton outings, August directed it in his initial effort. The film is actually three parts, all slightly tied into one another, though in no linear fashion to speak of, and the main cast inhabits roles in all three parts. Part one finds Gary (Ryan Reynolds, Smokin’ Aces), a successful television actor, engaged in a drug-soaked frenzy that leads him to crash his car and go under house arrest; Margaret (Melissa McCarthy, Gilmore Girls) is his handler designed to keep him on the straight and narrow during this time. Gary finds Sarah (Hope Davis, About Schmidt), a neighbor next door as his connection to the outside world in more ways than he can anticipate. In part two, Reynolds is Gavin, an aspiring television show creator, Davis plays Susan, a network television producer, and McCarthy plays herself as the focus of the show. And in part three, Reynolds is Gabriel, a video game producer, McCarthy plays his wife Mary, while Elle Fanning (Déjà vu) plays their daughter. What, no Davis? That’s what you think! She plays Sierra, a woman who helps Gabriel try to find help for his family on a deserted mountain road.