ThinkFilm / Velocity

Protocols of Zion

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on July 4th, 2006

I admit, when I received this film in the mail for review, I was extremely suspicious of it. I am not a conspiracy theorist, and though I am interested in the facts surrounding the 9-11 tragedy, I am not one that buys into all the theories surrounding the day. The cover of this disc, and the fact that it came to me by itself in a plain brown envelope, made me believe that I was in for another crackpot theory.

When I started to watch the film, however, I realized that this was going to be a film that was much …
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When Stand Up Stood Out

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on June 28th, 2006

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Hosted by Boston comic Fran Solomita, When Stand Up Stood Out is a detailed retrospective of the historic comedy boom that took the city by storm from the late 70’s to the early 80’s. You get the impression it was a fun crowd to be with most of the time. From the famous Ding Ho to the Comedy Connection, some of the nation’s biggest names worked out their routines to the local audiences.

The documentary tells its story very simply. With the use of extensive narrative, vintage clips, and countless interviews, you get a rather complete history of the phenomenon.
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Guardian of the Realm

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on June 11th, 2006

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Synopsis

A group of occultists horsing around with more than they know accidentally open up an evil portal and unleash a terrible force upon the world. Fortunately, there’s an organization of Demon Hunters on the job, determined to send this evil and all if its minions back where they came from.

We’re in sub-sub-sub-Buffy territory here. Like that series, the film has a fair amount of self-deprecating humour. Numerous jokes fall completely flat, but there are still a few that raise a chuckl…
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Andre the Butcher

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on May 30th, 2006

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Synopsis

On their way to a regional competition, a group of cheerleaders have a car accident, and wander into the rural landscape to look for help. They come across an apparently abandoned house. Two escaped convicts also find that house, and take two of the girls hostage, but soon everybody has a bigger problem in the shape of a hulking killer, Andre the Butcher, who has all sorts of supernatural powers as well as plenty of sharp blades.

Any movie that casts Ron Jeremy as a mad slasher has…
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The Big Question

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on April 29th, 2006

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When The Passion of the Christ was released on DVD several years ago, I didn’t buy it, opting instead to wait for the strongly-rumored special edition release to come. Here we are almost three years later, and no such release is being discussed. The funny thing is, The Big Question is essentially an extra for that non-existent DVD package. This documentary, which discusses questions of faith, was shot on the set of The Passion of the Christ, amongst the actors and artisans that were gathered from all parts of the planet for the production. This is a wonderful idea, and it makes for a great documentary featurette to support the film, but I just don’t feel that there is enough here for a stand-alone release.
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I Love Your Work

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on April 19th, 2006

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The only thing worse than films about filmmaking are artsy films about filmmaking. These are hazardous affairs at best. Don’t get me wrong; I thrive on a steady diet of behind the scenes features and film trade magazines. But a film in that vein can’t help but become pretentious. Enter I Love Your Work. It’s very hard to tell when Adam Goldberg is trying to be serious and when he’s aiming for satire. I hope it was mostly the latter.

Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not really out to g…
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Lie With Me

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on March 31st, 2006

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Synopsis

Lie With Me is proclaimed in its trailer to be a film in the tradition of Y Tu Mama Tambien and Sex, Lies and Videotape. But at its core, it’s more along the lines of another one of director Clement Virgo’s film influences, Bertolucci’s Last Tango in Paris. The characters in Lie With Me experience each other rather provocatively at the start of their relationship, and work their way outwards.

Based on a book by Tamara Berger, the film tells a story of Le…
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Choke, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 24th, 2006

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Synopsis

A fractious rock band known as the Choke, on the verge of breaking up (did all its members but know it) is supposed to play a gig at a local nightclub. But a killer has other plans, and (after a very long preamble) the members of the band find themselves trapped in the locked warehouse/nightclub, being picked off one by one. Suspicion falls first on one character, then another.

Creative young people trapped in a locked building with a killer. It’s been done well, but as Stagefri…
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Aristocrats, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on February 1st, 2006

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Synopsis

I never thought that a 90 minute documentary surrounding one joke could be so entertaining. And for all the praise that critics have heaped onto The Aristocrats, I was curious to see what the hype was. The film’s creators, comedians Paul Provenza and Penn Jillette (of Penn and Teller) spend the time interviewing many different comedians, and all of them share their thoughts about the joke. But it does a little more than that. Along with various versions of the joke, there is a deconstruction…
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Murderball

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on January 1st, 2006

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One of the few positive side-effects of the popular era of reality TV that we live in today is that the desire for the real has also crossed over to film. This has provided an excellent opportunity for documentary filmmakers to get their product seen by a large audience that just a few short years ago would never have taken the time to watch a documentary film. In fact, documentaries have become so mainstream that Murderball is produced in association with MTV Films. While a wheelchair rugby documentary sounds…
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Slaughterhouse of the Rising Sun

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 3rd, 2005

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Synopsis

Jennifer (Cheryl Dent) has just been released from a mental institution where she was incarcerated after a psychotic episode during which she clawed out the eyes of her co-star during the shooting of a porn flick. After being waylaid in the desert by a couple of thugs, she is rescued by a group of flower children, who soon turn out to be more dangerous yet. They head to house with a bad reputation, and then the murderous hippies start being killed off one by one. By Jennifer, or by something…
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Overnight

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on June 20th, 2005

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Synopsis

Troy Duffy, bartender, writes a script and suddenly is given a lucrative deal by Miramax to make this film, and his band is promised a recording contract. The script is for The Boondock Saints, that stunning little word-of-mouth success that has found quite a life of its own on DVD. But this is what happened before the film became a cult hit, as filmed by two of Duffy’s then-friends who were hired to do a making-of documentary. What we see is a man whose talent, though (on the basis o…
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Epoch: Evolution

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 22nd, 2004

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Synopsis

Ten years after the events of Epoch 2000 (didn’t see it? then be prepared to beconfused), scientist David Keith and his son (apparently the result of an immaculate conceptionthanks to alien intervention) are on the run from the Genesis Coalition (a well-funded group ofnutcases devoted to expunging all things alien from the world). Alien rock formations, called“toruses” (they look like frozen tornadoes) rise from the ground, and good guys and bad guysdescend on them to discov…
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Dragon Storm

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 21st, 2004

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Synopsis

Meteors plunge to Earth in the 12th Century, unleashing a horde of dragons from outer space(!). They destroy the castle of nasty king John Rhys-Davies. He and a few followers take refugein the castle of a good and wise king, plotting to overthrow him when opportunity arises.Meanwhile, a lone-wolf hunter is conscripted into hunting down the dragons, with the help ofa disparate band (including a martial arts expert — don’t ask).

This is another pic that follows the standard …
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Lost Innocence

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 14th, 2004

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Synopsis

Janie inherits a strip club from her uncle, and is determined to put the club back in the black,notably by getting all her college friends to strut their stuff on the stage. But not everyone wantsher to succeed, notably one conniving stripper who wants to get her hands on the treasuresecreted somewhere on the premises.

Why am I even bothering provided a synopsis for this poor man’s cross betweenShowgirls and Degrassi High? The plot gets us from one silicone-en…
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Eyes of Fire

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 8th, 2004

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Synopsis

A minor fire (not the big scorch that case implies) breaks out in the forest, and is quickly extinguished. Nonetheless, there are clear signs of arson, and four teens are involved. The Ranger in charge of the area locks the teens in his station and proceeds to work on ferreting out the truth of what happened. And this fractious group has secrets they would rather not reveal. The film turns into a tale of relationships and coming of age.

But I found it very difficult to care. The fo…
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King of the Ants

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 4th, 2004

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Synopsis

Chris L. McKenna plays Sean, who seems, at first, to be a typical slacker, working nothingjobs. He is hired by Daniel Baldwin (doing a very fine dissolute turn) first to watch atroublesome city hall accountant (whose wife — Kari Wuhrer — McKenna falls for), then to killhim. McKenna agrees with surprisingly little reluctance. He has a falling out with Baldwin andhis associates (including a brutal George Wendt), and they beat him to within an inch of the life,the idea being to indu…
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19 Months

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 2nd, 2004

Rob (Benjamin Ratner) and Melanie (Angela Vint) are a couple that think they’ve found the key to solving all relationship problems – simply break up after 19 months. By then, all the romance, lust, and excitement of a relationship has worn off and both people involved are ready to test the dating waters. So, they agree to do just that, only they’ll remain friends with benefits until they each find someone else. To prove that their theory is correct, Rob and Melanie even allow a film crew to follow them around and ma…
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Kung Phooey!

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on November 23rd, 2004

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Synopsis

Many years ago, a mystical peach holding the secret of eternal life was stolen. Now, aftertraining since childhood at the Shur-Li Temple (get it?) under the tutelage of Master Card and thelike, a hero arises to recover the peach: Art Chew. He arrives in Vancouver (played by SanFrancisco, in one of the film’s cleverer conceits), and is joined on his quest by such friends asRoy Lee, who has seen a great many kung-fu movies, but is completely incompetenthimself.

This is an g…
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Dark Heaven

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on October 25th, 2004

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Synopsis

Officer Gabriel Goodman (and yes, the name is supposed to be allegorical) comes to on thefloor of his precinct. He is alone, and his watch is running backwards. Strange enough, but thenhe stumbles outside to discover that the city is deserted. He follows a hooded figure, andencounters a priest who is locked out of his own church, and has apparently gone mad. Moreshadowy figures lure Goodman into a school, and he is soon locked in conflict with the priest,mysterious beings, …
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Nightmare Boulevard

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on October 15th, 2004

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Synopsis

A serial killer (whose methods, though gruesome, resemble in no way the atmospheric casefor this disc) is carving up women. Ron Perlman slowly investigates, but the main plot concernsignored housewife Claudia Christian. When her husband hares off again on another trip, she hasa torrid one-nighter with a pick-up at her tennis club. This is a bad move, since the toyboy is akiller, and he begins to stalk Christian Fatal Attraction-style, while the police begin tosuspect her hus…
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In Praise of Older Women

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on October 6th, 2004

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Synopsis

Tom Berenger plays Andras Vayda, a young man growing up in post-war Hungary. He isboth precociously sexual and completely at sea with girls his own age, and at 16 becomes thelover of Karen Black. He then has a succession of older mistresses, including Susan Strasberg asa revolutionary in the heady days of the unsuccessful Hungarian uprising against the Communistsin the late 50s. He then moves to Canada, where his adventures continue.

The tale of sexual adventures pl…
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Aileen Wuornos: The Selling of a Serial Killer

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on October 6th, 2004

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Synopsis

Nick Broomfield’s first documentary about Aileen Wuornos is a mixture of media clips andinterviews Broomfield conducted with Wuornos and the major figures in her trial, notably heradoptive mother and her unbelievably sleazy and incompetent lawyer (his “Dr. Legal” ad markshim as the legal equivalent of Dr. Nick Riviera). Then there’s the issue of police corruption. Allin all, essential viewing, especially in conjunction with the later film (which shows that, at thevery least said la…
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One Eyed King

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on October 6th, 2004

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Synopsis

William Baldwin is the leader of a group of friends in New York’s Hell’s Kitchen area. Theyare all on the periphery of the crime world, and the local kingpin is Armand Assante (with a mostsinister scar on his cheek). Two of the five become involved in a scheme that has them passingincompetently counterfeited hundred-dollar bills, and Assante demands their lives. Baldwininvestigates the death of one of them, and gradually realizes the depth of the betrayal.

The plot is rathe…
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Whacked!

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on September 23rd, 2004

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Synopsis

This is a tale of two adopted brothers. One (Paul Sampson) stayed home in Jersey, becominga hit man for the Mob. The other (Patrick Muldoon) tried to escape that life, and became anassassin for the CIA. When computer nerd Judge Reinhold discovers a crooked deal arrangedby a rogue CIA officer, a contract is taken out on his life, and Sampson gets the job. Reinholdruns to Muldoon for help, thus reuniting the brothers, who realize the Agency goon has beenmanipulating them. Now they fi…
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