Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 8th, 2008
Why god must you do this? Why does Hollywood in all its limited wisdom try to remake any and everything with the hopes that it will be good, when it just winds up becoming another EPIC FAIL? They’ve done it with The Grudge, they’ve done it with The Eye, and now I hear they might be remaking Oldboy and The Host. We’re coming up on sacred cow territory here, and quite frankly, I don’t know why these films have to be “Americanized” to appeal to the unwashed masses; I thought the whole point of them was to be appreciated on their own merits. But sure enough, the horror film genre is guilty of cannibalizing product like anyone else. See what I did there?
Moving on, The Eye is based on the 2002 Hong Kong film Gin gwai, but Tom Cruise’s CW Production studio bought the American rights, and Sebastian Gutierrez (Snakes on a Plane) adapted the screenplay for American audiences, in a film that David Moreau and Xavier Palud (Them) directed. Sydney Wells (Jessica Alba, The Love Guru) is a classically trained violinist who has been blind most of her life. Upon receiving a corneal transplant (the eyes people, work with me here), she starts to see visions that shock and terrify her. Her sister Helen (Parker Posey, Best In Show) doesn’t know what to do for her, and her doctor (Alessandro Nivola, Grace is Gone) thinks she’s crazy, even though she walks around with strange markings on her hands and arms. So she tries to find out where her donor eyes came from, and the person who had them before saw unimaginable horror, and those visions are transferred to Sydney.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 8th, 2008
"Space...The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 8th, 2008
For as much as I might viscerally disagree with the creation of a film or its sequel, I lay much of the blame at you, the viewer and movie-going public. You created the furor around the Step Up series of films. You all went in droves to the first film when it was released in August 2006, when movies were winding down in the blockbuster season and thus helped it make $65 million domestically and more than $110 worldwide. It’s your fault that another film was inevitable, so in the down-turn of this past February, we got a second one. That one made about the same domestically, but made $30 million or so more and almost brought in $150 million worldwide. Count on the fact that another 90-minute film about teens dancing will be made and that the Step Up trilogy (I threw up in my mouth a little when writing that) will be complete.
Step Up 2 was written by Toni Ann Johnson (Mean Father) and Karen Barna, which begs the overall question of why TWO people needed to write a movie about dancing, but I digress. John Chu (When The Kids Are Away) directed. Andie is played by Briana Evigan, and if the name is familiar to you, she’s the daughter of Greg Evigan of BJ and the Bear fame. Briana does not look like a chimp, for the record. She decides to become friends with Chase (Robert Hoffman, She’s the Man) at a school the two go to in Maryland. They try to join an exclusive dance crew named the 410 and are rejected, so they start their own dance crew to go against the 410 in a dance competition. That’s the story, but the main focus is on the film and the dancing. The dancing carries the film from beginning to end and is peppered excessively throughout, and that’s what people cared for and what people saw.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 8th, 2008
Family Ties is likely remembered most as the series that launched the career of Michael J. Fox. There’s no question that he owes a great debt to Alex Keaton. It’s almost a bit awkward now to watch him as this young, extremely conservative teenager after Fox has spent so much of his life as a liberal poster boy in the last couple of elections. Politics aside, it’s hard not to credit his performances in Family Ties and the Back To The Future films for launching him into a well deserved lucrative career. The Michael J. Fox issue, however, might hide some of the other assets the show had going for it in its time. For one of the first times parents were portrayed as humanly flawed, and families were not the perfectly functional institutions most of these shows described. Up until Family Ties, these households were either perfect little examples of American ideal or they were so dysfunctional that they could hardly be considered families at all. This show obviously went for a bit of realism.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 1st, 2008
The first huge mistake this new film on The Boston Strangler makes is in the casting. If I were to mention to you The Boston Strangler and Bundy in the same sentence, who would you think about for the latter reference? I’d bet most of you would be thinking about Ted, the infamous serial killer finally electrocuted here in sunny Florida a few years back. Unfortunately that’s not who I’m talking about here. It’s none other than Bud Bundy, that hapless young pervert from Married With Children. That’s right, folks. David Faustino plays Albert De Salvo, the suspected killer. He comes across as a completely clueless idiot for the entire film. Of course, the rest of the cast is equally bad. The police department is represented by Timothy Oman as Captain Parker and John Marsden as the lead detective. If these guys are indicative of the way the investigation was handled, it’s no wonder the crime was never solved. They completely sleepwalk through the parts with about as much passion as if they were eating a cheese sandwich. Could they have found two more disinterested actors? The only spark to the film at all is a somewhat dim one in Frank Asarian, the potential “real” killer in the film, played by Kostas Sommer. He’s incredibly stiff and also lacks any life, but he provides some of the film’s miniscule tension moments. Finally, the entire cast suffered from what can only be an intentional exaggeration of the
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 1st, 2008
In the business of reviewing films you will definitely have your ups and downs. This week has absolutely been a downer. It seems that I can’t get a break. There are just too many bad movies out there. When I settled down to view Mama’s Boy there was a little hope. Looking at the cast you see some pretty solid names. Two veteran Godfather film actors in Diane Keaton and Eli Wallach make for a pretty good start. Jeff Daniels might not be the best out there, but he certainly has range playing plenty of fair to good comedic roles and also delivering a stellar performance as Col. Chamberlain in the Civil War hits
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 1st, 2008
“Can you take the dump of death”, or What’s the fastest way to get drunk”. These are the types of questions and answers that make up the Spike TV series Manswers. The idea is that the show answers those pressing questions that you guys out there might have been to afraid to ask. On first look you might get the mistaken idea that this is a copy of A&E’s far superior Mythbusters. On the surface the premise appears the same. Both shows appear to tackle the oddball question and attempt to find the truth behind the BS. Both shows also appear to be targeted to the male members of the audience. Mythbusters uses cool tools and gadetry to prove or debunk the common myths. The guy appeal is obvious, and there’s always a good chance something’s getting blown up. Guys are naturally curious, and we love to see things blow up. Manswers takes the far more pedestrian view of a guy’s interests. Instead of blowing things apart Manswers tries to draw you in with body parts; female body parts, that is. Just about every other segment has something to do with the female breast: “What does shape tell you about how easy she is”, “Can a breast crush a beer can”, “Which float better real or fake”. You get the idea. Now most guys don’t have a lot of trouble with all of this close examination of female anatomy, but the Manswer I want answered is: “Can you go too far?” Turns out the answer is, who could have known, yes.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on August 1st, 2008
John Leguizamo needs his own kind of wing in some Movie Hall of Fame. I would not say it is a typical wing, but a varied and interesting one nevertheless. He’s done mainstream movies like Ice Age, Moulin Rouge, & the Happening. John has also found himself in roles you just don’t see everyday. He’s been a Clown (Spawn), a Drag Queen (To Wong Foo), and even a Mario Brother (You really think I would fail to mention that John was Luigi in Super Mario Bros?). In The Take, he has a different character to portray. It’s a serious role and requires him to make quite the transformation and bring home an award winning performance.
John plays Felix De La Pena. Felix is an armored car driver, has a wife named Marina (played by Rosie Perez) and has two kids named Rosey & Javy (played by Jessica Steinbaum & Taylor Gray). First detail of logic: Would it not be easier if Rosie’s character was called Rosey & Jessica could have been Marina? Then again, if it was up to me I would have called Rosie the Hispanic Betty Boop. Anyhow, Felix goes to work and while one of his buddies gets out of the car to grab lunch, Adell Baldwin (played by Tyrese Gibson) gets in the cab of the armored car and points a gun into Felix’s face.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 31st, 2008
Cult Epics continues its erotic archival work with these two collections of short films. Volume 1 consists of pieces from the 1940s (with at least one from 1938 thrown in), while Volume 2 deals with the 50s. The former has such amusing “documentary” shorts as “They Wear No Clothes” (*gasp*) and various comedy routines. The latter has the inevitable Irving Klaw shorts. None of these films are by any definition “good,” but they are fascinating records of the state of American sexuality at that time. Watching all of these at one sitting would be quite the chore, but then, when was the last time you read an encyclopaedia straight through? There is a similar documentary value here.
Audio
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on July 30th, 2008
Campy blood & horror movies have always been a sore spot for me. I’m not talking about funny horror films with character like Shaun of the Dead. I’m talking about those movies that have a high amount of gore and little story to back it up. A movie that is played up for lack of acting and focuses more on how gruesome they make the average murder. Troma films immediately come to mind. However, there are times films that from their campy behavior create a story and scenes that are bearable to watch and a good ride on the couch. Perhaps we have found such a film in Botched a 2007 film directed by Kit Ryan. Just as long as it doesn’t turn into another Tripper, I think we will be alright.
Poor ol’ Ritchie Donovan (played by Stephen Dorff). This thieving gig he has is bringing him so much bad luck. After a diamond robbery goes awry, he is sent to Moscow to steal a rare antique cross locked away in an office building. He is given two companions: Yuri (played by Russell Smith) & Peter (played by Jamie Foreman) who are brothers but appear to be heavily in experienced in the ways of crime. They get to the penthouse as planned and make the heist. However, in the process Yuri goes off script and things start to go horribly wrong. A murder ends up at his feet as they head to the elevator to escape the scene of the crime. Once inside the elevator, things only become worse.
