How’s Your News
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 15th, 2004
Synopsis
The How’s Your News? team is a group of physically and/or mentally challenged reporterswho set off on a journey across the US, interviewing people on the street, at a cattle-call, onalligator farms, and so on. Though at first blush the premise might raise warning flags, not tomention the presence of Matt Stone and Trey Parker as exec-producers, but such worries (which Iconfess I shared) are unwarranted. This is a film that the reporters are proud of, and directorArthur Brad…
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Live Nude Girls
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 14th, 2004
Synopsis
Kim Catrall is a B-movie actress about to get hitched for the third time. Lora Zane hosts abachelorette party for her. A group of old friends gather, and all their secrets about their livescome spilling out, with a special emphasis on the sexual aspect. So Catrall has doubts, Zane istrouble by heterosexual fantasies that are undermining her relationship with Olivia D’Abo,Cynthia Stevenson is being stalked by her house painter, and sisters Dana Delany (lustful andgossipy) an…
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Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 14th, 2004
Synopsis
Life is hard for Mary (Lindsay Lohan). In the first place, she feels her name should actuallybe “Lola,” and that is how she introduces herself to all and sundry. Then her mother goes andmoves the family from exciting Manhattan to less-than-exciting New Jersey. As if things weren’trough enough, her favourite rock group is about to break up. She is determined to keep glamourin her life, however, not to mention getting to see the band’s farewell concert. Along the way,she will…
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Broken Wings
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 13th, 2004
Synopsis
Dafna is a midwife, overworked and underpaid, who lost her husband nine months ago andis only barely functional. She dumps most of the familial responsibilities on her eldest daughter,Maya, and doesn’t notice the price that Maya is paying in having to give up her hopes andaspirations. Eldest son Yair has reacted to the death of his father by adopting a despairingphilosophy and dropping out of school. Younger brother Ido is tormented by bullies and wetshis bed. And youngest …
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Barbershop 2: Back in Business
Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on July 12th, 2004
There is an interesting trend that seems to be going on in Hollywood right now. Contrary to the record of history, sequels are starting to turn out better, not worse, than their original productions. X2 was better than X-Men, Spidey 2 was better than the first, and each installment in the The Lord of the Rings trilogy built upon the previous episode to an eventual Best Picture climax. I am thrilled that this is the case, since there are more sequels being made now than ever before.
Nest, The
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 11th, 2004
Synopsis
On July 14, Bastille Day, a group of small-time hoods stage a daring warehouse robbery.Meanwhile, a brutal Albanian mafia kingpin is being transported to Strasbourg for trial. Theconvoy is ambushed by what looks like an entire battalion of heavily armed men, and thearmoured car winds up taking refuge in the warehouse. The soldiers and the thieves, massivelyoutgunned and outnumbered, band together to hold off the enormous siege.
The jacket copy calls this film “Th…
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Thunderbirds – International Rescue Edition (Thunderbirds Are Go / Thunderbird 6)
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 11th, 2004
Synopsis
If the word “Supermarionation” triggers a delicious shiver of nostaglia in you, then youobviously need read no further. The stories of the two films are properly expansive variations onthe TV show’s basic plots.
In Thunderbirds Are Go (1966), a Mars-bound spaceship, the Zero-X, is sabotaged ontake-off. International Rescue is called in to provide security for the second attempt. This time,the Zero-X makes it into space. But its sojurn on Mars and return to Ea…
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Star Trek Voyager – The Complete Third Season
Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 11th, 2004
Season three of Voyager was the most exciting so far. This is the year Q, one of Star Trek’s most beloved characters, adds Janeway to his list of captains to pester. The powerful Borg would also enter Voyager’s universe in Season three. The year would end with a cliffhanger that also introduces 7 of 9 to the cast. This was Kes’s final year. There’s no question that the show’s dynamics went from stun to kill. Episodes became a bit more standalone. The long overdone Kazon arc would be abandoned for more compelling dram…
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Windfall
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 9th, 2004
Synopsis
Casper Van Dien and Robert Englund stage a daring casino robbery on the resort island ofSandbridge. (Where does Van Dien get his helicopter from? Don’t ask.) As we move fromfull night to mid-afternoon in a matter of minutes, our affable criminals are pursued at high speedand finally caught by security chief Gregg Henry (doing his clench-jawed villainy familiar fromPayback, and lifted from Gary Busey). Casino owner Ray Wise (Leland Palmer fromTwin Peaks) gives Van Dien…
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Super Spy
Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on July 9th, 2004
This is an odd little film, indeed. The best way that I can describe it is as a cross between Bowfinger and a James Bond film. It is billed as a comedy, but the first half-hour is clearly drama. Of course, when the comedy portion does come in, it’s not funny either. The plot is surprisingly complex, but at its core, it involves a movie production that accidentally captures a crime taking place on film. Now the criminals are after the crew.
Truth be told, this might have turned out to have been a pret…
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Lost Skeleton of Cadavra
Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 9th, 2004
In the greatest tradition of 1950’s producers like William Castle comes The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. Castle fans will appreciate the “Filmed in Skeletovision” gag on the cover art. This is a wonderful send-up of the 1950’s science fiction genre. Most of the acting is deliberately over the top and the gags are often too obvious… but this is funny stuff. The music cues are dead on. Fans of Mystery Science Fiction Theatre 3000 will also find this film entertaining to the extreme. Andrew Parks steals the show wit…
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Charlie Chan Chanthology, The
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 8th, 2004
Synopsis
Though the character first appeared on film in 1926, the Charlie Chan films proper ran from1931 to 1949. Warner Oland’s interpretation of the character is the most beloved, though SidneyToller (who took over after Oland died in 1938) was still part of the series’ peak (1936-9). In1944, beginning with Charlie Chan in the Secret Service, the series moved from 20thCentury Fox to Monogram, one of the Poverty Row studios, and the decline began, though thecheapest of the f…
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Party Animalz
Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on July 7th, 2004
Sometimes, I just don’t know where to begin with these reviews. There are bad movies, there are really bad movies, and then there are movies such as this. When it comes to DVD, extremely bad comedies are the lowest of the low. Bad dramas, horror films or love stories are usually only bad because they are tired and predictable. While that doesn’t make them any less annoying, at least they are comfortable. A bad comedy, however, goes beyond those other annoyances and creates something that is truly uncomfortable. It’s …
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South Park – The Complete Fourth Season
Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 6th, 2004
South Park had peaked with Season 3. The film was a huge hit and some of the best stuff came out that year. Season 4 would become a more up and down year. It’s obvious that the Stone and Parker team decided to push the envelope a bit further. This is also the year we got wheelchair bound Timmy. I liked Timmy at first, but he just gets old fast. One of the highlights of this season is the last episode. Another Mr. Hanky Christmas episode has the boys creating a special computer Christmas card called “The Spirit of Chr…
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Kotch
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 6th, 2004
Synopsis
Walter Matthau is Joseph P. Kotcher, a doting grandfather who is rapidly wearing out hiswelcome at the home of his son and daughter-in-law. Increasingly unwanted, Matthau finallyrebels when life in a retirement home looms. He winds up hitting the road with a pregnantteenager, and once again he is needed.
Jack Lemmon made his directorial debut with this piece that simultaneous goes all-out andtakes the easy way in its determined effort to be heartwarming. Matthau, ra…
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Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 6th, 2004
Synopsis
Cody Banks (Frankie Muniz) is training at a CIA summer camp. A midnight drill that resultsin the flight of the camp leader turns out not to have been a drill at all. It turns out that the man isa villain (so why did the CIA let him run the camp at all?) and he has absconded with a mind-control device. Muniz is sent to England to track him down, where he hooks up with fellow teenspy Hannah Spearritt and adult-yet-childlike handler Anthony Anderson.
The idea of a CIA …
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G.I. Joe Season 1 Part 2
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 6th, 2004
Synopsis
G.I. Joe is the collective name of a secret assault force who are locked in combat with thenefarious terrorist organization Cobra (who certainly can afford much nicer accommodationsthan al-Qaeda). Adventures include everything from a giant mutated bacteria to the swordExcalibur. There are also four two-parter episodes.
The animation is typical 80s Saturday morning: crap. The stories move quickly enough, butit is surprising how many of the Joes sound deeply stupid. A…
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Inhabited
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 5th, 2004
Synopsis
Megan Gallagher and family move into a new house, and very soon things start to go wrong.It seems that there is a race of little creatures, the “Huldre,” living under the earth, and they playincreasingly nasty pranks. Their central target is Gallagher’s young daughter, who at first isdelighted to befriend the creatures. Malcolm McDowell, slumming for another paycheck, plays apsychiatrist who sees the child’s case as his ticket to glory.
The plotting is sloppy, the character…
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Gacy
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 5th, 2004
Synopsis
John Wayne Gacy (Mark Holton) is a typical, if rather slobbish, middle-class family man. Heis the local organizer for the Democrats. He also has a bad stench emanating from the crawlspace beneath his house, and the neighbours keep complaining. Gacy has his work cut out forhim dealing with the stench, since it is caused by the rotting bodies of the young men he hasmurdered.
The lurid qualities of Gacy’s crimes mean that this film could have been an unwatchableexercise in b…
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Teknolust
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 5th, 2004
Synopsis
Mousy scienties Rosetta Stone (Tilda Swinton) creates three Self Replecating Automatons(SRAs): the glamorous Ruby, Marinne and Olive (all played by Swinton). The SRAs need themale Y chromosome to survive, so Ruby ventures forth from their home periodically for someanonymous sex. She saves the condoms, which are subsequently used as tea bags. The SRAs pinefor independent life, and Ruby oversteps her bounds, thus risking discovery for them all.
Though some of the elements mig…
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Nine Lives
Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 3rd, 2004
What we have here is a messy British independent film that takes most of its cues from the Agatha Christy 10 Little Indians formula. The film fails to provide enough setup or character development to ensure we give a crap about any of these people or what happens to them. As the dull actors and their equally dull counterparts disappear, I found myself looking forward to losing another one. Most of these chaps are complete unknowns. Only Paris Hilton’s name rang any bells. The producers were quite aware of this dilemm…
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3-Way
Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on July 2nd, 2004
I usually meet discs that contain a movie that I have never previously heard of with a groan. I figure the chances are that if I missed it in theaters, and I have never seen a preview for it, or seen it mentioned on a chat board, there’s probably a good reason. These were my exact feelings on the day that 3-Way arrived on my doorstep. These feelings were further confirmed upon insertion of the disc, when I was greeted by trailers for such classic films as Cruel intentions 2 and 3, and Wild Thi…
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Dragon Fighter
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 2nd, 2004
Synopsis
Dean Cain arrives at a secret base in California to take over as head of security from hisRussian predecessor. (Why is the other guy Russian? Because the movie was shot in EasternEurope.) He arrives in time for a DNA cloning experiment conducted by the chief scientist/chiefweasel (whose accent sounds more like Moscow than the Chicago of which he supposedly anative). The experiment results in the Jurassic Park-style resurrection of a fire-breathingdragon.
What follo…
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Heartburn
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on June 30th, 2004
Synopsis
Meryl Streep is Nora Ephron and Jack Nicholson is Carl Bernstein. Well, the names aredifferent, but Ephron’s script is based on her novel, which in turn is based on her fractiousmarriage to the Watergate journalist. He is the inveterate womanizer, while she is one of thosefemale protagonists so beloved of romantic comedies that are supposed, I think, to be“charmingly insecure” but read instead as “high-maintenance neurotic.” They get married, andvery swiftly things begin to…
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Dawson’s Creek – The Complete Third Season
Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on June 30th, 2004
Synopsis
Season Three finds our earnest characters dealing with the usual assortment of relationshipand other problems. As the season opens, Dawson and Joey have broken up, and Dawson meets arather sexually forward young woman on a bus. By the end of the season, Joey is involved withPacey. The headline-grabber from these episodes was Jack’s gay kiss.
As I believe I mentioned when reviewing the series finale, I am at a distinct disadvantagewhen it comes to talking about this …
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