South Park: The Cult of Cartman – Revelations

Brothers and Sisters, we are gathered here today to extol the virtues of our moral champion, Eric Cartman. I’ve come here to praise Eric, not to bury him. It wasn’t much more than 12 years ago to this very day that we first met Eric. Certainly the presentation was a bit crude, and often the teachings were less focused and incoherent. Still, it didn’t take long before we could see an underlying message in the construction paper animation. Before too long the faithful grew, and the wisdom of Eric Cartman could no longer be stopped. Stan, Kyle, even Kenny. They tried to distract us from what we knew was the important message of each episode. Somehow the light managed to shine through. We weren’t watching South Park. We were watching The Eric Cartman Show.

Paramount has delivered us from the evils of censorship. They have assembled on 2 DVD discs the best… or is that really the worst…  of Eric Cartman. You might agree or disagree on the selection. I for one can’t believe that Chicken Lover was not included, since that’s where Eric first established his Author-Ity. The thing we have to remember here is that this collection puts the emphasis where it ought to be…on Eric Cartman. I know what you’re thinking. Brother Gino, you might be saying to yourself, isn’t this another example of greedy studios double dipping on programming just to get a few extra dollars out of the fans. Of course it is. That only shows that Paramount has simply embraced Cartmanism. To be fair, there has been a 12^th season as yet unreleased episode included here. But, won’t it be on the next season set, you ask. Certainly. And you’ll gladly fork over even more dough to get it again, just like Cartman would expect you to.

So, what’s in this 2 disc package you might ask. Here’s another edition of:

The Good:

The Death Of Eric Cartman: When the boys are finally tired of Cartman they decide to ignore him. Eric thinks he’s dead. Because Butters didn’t know about the “ignore Cartman campaign” he talks to him, leaving Eric to think he’s the only one who can see and hear him. It’s The Sixth Sense and Ghost Whisperer.

Cartman Wars: Cartman wants Family Guy cancelled and will stop at nothing to get it done. This is also the famous “showing of Mohammed” episode that caused a bit of controversy over at Comedy Central.

Le Petite Tourette: Once Cartman learns that kids with Tourette Syndrome can get away with saying anything they want without getting into trouble, he fakes the disease. This is classic Cartman.

The Bad:

Ginger Kids: This may be classic Cartman, but it goes way too far to make a point.

Cartmanland: Over the top as Cartman builds an amusement park like Dollyland.

The Ugly:

EEK A Penis: This is really a Garrison episode to me. It’s another sex change for the teacher.

Scott Tenorman Must Die: Buying and selling pubic hair? Come on, guys. Gross!

Video

Each South Park episode is presented in its original television full frame format. Expect pretty much the same as previous seasons. This stuff is pretty much created in a digital environment, and it shows. Colors are bright, or at least as bright as simulated construction paper gets.

Audio

Don’t expect much from this simple Dolby Digital 2.0 track. Still, what the heck do we need fancy surrounds for on South Park? As long as I can hear Cartman, life is good. I do wish that they would avoid the bleep noises on home releases. We’re fair warned about language, so what’s the point?

Special Features

Each episode features a ten second Cartman word of wisdom. A good example is “Never give up on cheating”. There’s also a very short Cartman intro. Don’t buy it for the extras.

Final Thoughts

In daily situations you might ask yourself WWCD: What would Cartman do? It’s usually best to then do the opposite, unless you just want to get ahead by any means. Sounds like a good educational primer for the candidates here in election season. You get a cool looking case, a membership card into the Eric Cartman Society, and some other swag. In short it’s everything you need to ”have a super fun time all of the time”.