1.85:1 Widescreen

Ring Two, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 13th, 2005

Synopsis

After the events of the first film, Naomi Watts and her young son are starting a new life for themselves in a small town. But the curse of Samara reaches out to them, as not only are there more victims of the lethal videotape in this town (thus driving home Watts’ guilt for having copied the tape herself), but Samara strives to possess Watts’ son.

Everything is here, conceptually, for a pretty gruelling exercise in horror. Every mother’s nightmare is played on as Watts is suspected…
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Platoon

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 11th, 2005

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Synopsis

There are a good number of people who have labeled Oliver Stone as a fan of conspiracy theories, out to destroy foundations of conservative ideology, while at the same time re-visiting 60’s nostalgic icons. Despite the jokes and the stereotyping, one has to admit that, as a filmmaker, he has helped bring to screen some of the most talked about cinematic experiences of our time, including Midnight Express, Scarface, not to mention Conan the Barbarian. As a director, his works, s…
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Deal, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 7th, 2005

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What’s the dealio with The Deal? Well… Christian Slater’s in it. Selma Blair’s in it. What’s it about? The Deal is a thriller set in the world of insider trading and the oil market. Sounds like a bore? Well, the film is fairly knowledgable about its information. The screenplay has a lot of “insider” gobbledegook. The characters talk the talk, but can they walk the walk?

The Deal, on a thriller level, gets lost in its own plot. Tom Hanson (Christian Slater) slogs through a maz…
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Harry and Tonto

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 5th, 2005

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Synopsis

Art Carney is a spirited senior (the Harry of the title) who is evicted from his home (the building is going to be torn down to make way for a parking lot). He sets out with his cat Tonto on a cross-country journey that sees him bouncing off family members and strangers on their own journeys.

Some of these encounters are less believable than others (the Hooker With The Heart of Gold, for example), but the tone of the film is a gentle, wry, observational humour. Carney is excellent,…
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Hexed

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 3rd, 2005

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I can sum up this entire film in a single word; lame. There is nothing sadder than a comedy that is not funny, and this is certainly that. Bad acting, bad jokes and the feel of an 80’s comedy makes this film the very definition of lame. Imagine Blind Date without the humor. Now add blatant rip-offs from Basic Instinct and Fatal Attraction. Throw in some bad jokes and you’re ready to go.

The plot has something to do with a hotel bellhop who impersonates people for entertainment, and tells …
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With Six You Get Eggroll

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 3rd, 2005

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With Six You Get Eggroll is special for one reason. Other than the politically incorrect title, the movie features the last film appearance by Doris Day. Too bad she couldn’t go out with a bang. I will admit: I like Doris Day. The Man Who Knew Too Much is a great film. And all that “Pillow Talk” stuff. C’mon, it’s fun. But let’s get to the Eggroll, shall we?

With Six… starts off as a fairly realistic romance/comedy. Day plays Abby McClure, the owner of a construction company (…
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Out of Sight

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 27th, 2005

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Synopsis

After being the hunk of the moment on E.R., George Clooney came out of the starting blocks as a film actor in a few films, ranging the gamut from cult favorite (From Dusk ‘Til Dawn) to somewhat critically praised (The Peacemaker). He was also played the starring role in the film that put the Batman franchise on life support. One of his first smart acting choices came in Out Of Sight, directed by Steven Soderbergh, before Soderbergh became the Hollywood flavor of the mont…
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My Left Foot

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 25th, 2005

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Synopsis

This is the biopic of Irish painter and writer Christy Brown. Born with crippling cerebral palsy, he retained movement only in his left foot. His body is a cage for his mind, and at first, only his mother believes that he is an intelligent being. When, as a child, he spells “MOTHER” on the floor in chalk, this is the breakthrough moment, and we follow him through the triumphs and frustrations of his adult years.

The film is markedly different from what one would imagine would be th…
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Pom Poko

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 21st, 2005

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Synopsis

When the economic boom in Japan leads to massive deforestation, the raccoons find their habitat threatened. They band together and mount a campaign to stop the destruction of their world by humans. They learn to shape change, and wreak merry havoc with construction crews. Some of their stunts simply frighten the people off, but some of the sabotage is deadly, too.

The packaging and the “From the Creators of Howl’s Moving Castle” might be a bit misleading in this case. Studio…
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Calamari Wrestler, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 19th, 2005

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Synopsis

A championship wrestling match is disrupted when the winner is challenged by a giant squid. The squid wins by using a move that was the distinctive trademark of a vanished former champion. Could there be a connection? The girlfriend of the current champ, old flame of the former, certainly wonders. There is something about the squid that draws her… Meanwhile, the wrestling bosses want a rematch, but also want the squid to throw the match. He refuses. Can he beat the corruption in the sport …
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Momentum

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 19th, 2005

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Synopsis

A gang of thieves using telekinetic powers is on the loose. They are the result of CIA experiments decades ago, but only about-to-retire Louis Gossett, Jr. (remember when he had a theatrical release career?) takes the threat seriously. He enlists a similarly powered young physics professor to infiltrate the gang. Meanwhile, FBI agent Teri Hatcher is also on the case. The poor prof is soon in over his head.

Nothing here that hasn’t been done before and better. Take Firestarter, for instance, and that movie isn’t even that good. The production is workmanlike but ho-hum, and the telekinetic drafted to fight bad guys by means of budget-conscious special effects puts me in mind of a failed TV pilot I saw back in the 70s: The Man With The Power.

Audio

The audio is a generous 5.1 (one of the few generous things about this bare-bones disc). The placement of the sound effects is good, and the sense of an environment is quite nicely done. The dialgoue is clear and undistorted. The music sounds fine, though it isn’t exactly booming.

Video

The colours are very strong, with excellent flesh tones. The blacks are deep, the contrasts fine, and the image is sharp. In other words, a very good transfer. So even if what’s on the screen isn’t really worth watching, it looks nice.

Special Features

Nothing here but a trailer for Sin City and (surprise, surprise) Desperate Housewives. The menu is basic.

Closing Thoughts

Deeply ordinary stuff. Don’t waste your time.

Special Features List

Trailers

Kurosawa DVD Collection

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 11th, 2005

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Synopsis

Akira Kurosawa’s impact on filmmaking and storytelling will be part of Western cinema for decades to come. Despite being slightly underappreciated in his later years in his native Japan, some of the work he put to film is some of the greatest and most influential ever seen. His work, such as Rashomon, The Hidden Fortress and The Seven Samurai, to name a few, have been remade or cited as major influences in the films and/or careers of George Lucas, Clint Eastwood and James Cobur…
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Magic Sword, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on August 10th, 2005

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Synopsis

Evil wizard Basil Rathbone kidnaps a beautiful princess (Anne Helm), and the bland Gary Lockwood, who has loved her from afar, charges to the rescue with his magic horse, armour and sword. Along the way he must confront seven curses set by Rathbone (ogre, burning heat, hideous hag, dragon, and so on), not to mention the treachery of one of his party.

This is an all-ages fantasy from Bert I. Gordon, who is best known for his cheapjack back-projection SF epics the likes of The Ama…
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Warm Summer Rain

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on August 9th, 2005

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Synopsis

Kelly Lunch plays a young woman who begins the movie by attempting suicide. She is saved, and annoyed by the friends and family who visit her in the hospital, she takes off in her hospital clothes and a coat, hopping on a bus and getting off in the middle of a desert nowhere. One drunken night later, she wakes up in a house married to a stranger. Cue a whole bunch of sex scenes and psychological drama.

The film certainly aims high, with an arty tone set in the opening seconds, usin…
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Illegally Yours

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 7th, 2005

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Synopsis

Peter Bogdanovich may be the victim of having too much too soon, as he was well known for his work in the early 1970s, starting with The Last Picture Show and Paper Moon, but experienced a string of poorly received work as well. Following the 1980 murder of his girlfriend Dorothy Stratten (at the hands of her estranged husband), he stayed out of the business (and was bankrupt) for awhile, but returned in 1985 with the excellent film Mask. In Illegally Yours, he manages t…
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Target

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on August 7th, 2005

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Synopsis

Lately various studios have been releasing films with Gene Hackman onto DVD, films like Scarecrow and Twice in a Lifetime. And after a run in 1983’s Uncommon Valor, he teamed with Matt Dillon (The Flamingo Kid) in 1985’s Target, the proverbial Cold War spy thriller.

Directed by Arthur Penn (Bonnie and Clyde) Walter (Hackman) and Chris Lloyd (Dillon) are a father and son who don’t get along very well, as Walter wants Chris to do something with his …
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Cypher

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 3rd, 2005

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Synopsis

Jeremy Northam plays the rather insecure Morgan Sullivan, who applies for a job as a corporate spy for Digicorp. His first few missions under the identity of James Thursby go well, but he is tormented by headaches and strange nightmares. Then he encounters Lucy Liu, who reveals that his missions are a sham and that Digicorp is brainwashing him to believe that he really IS Thursby, and so will be the perfect double agent to spy on another company.

Then the plot gets complicated. Thi…
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Cry-Baby

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on August 1st, 2005

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Synopsis

Think of this as the John Waters version of Grease, with everything that that entails. The setting is the fifties, and kids are divided between the Squares (so clean-cut and conformist they make Ward Cleaver look like Marlon Brando) and the black-leather-clad Drapes. The leader of the Drapes is Cry-Baby Walker (Johnny Depp), and his posse includes the likes of Ricki Lake (BEFORE she became a talk-show host) and Traci Lords (AFTER… well, after). Square Amy Locane is drawn to Depp an…
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Wild Orchid 2: Blue Movie Blue

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on August 1st, 2005

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Synopsis

In the 1950s, Blue (Nina Siemaszko) travels from town to town with her itinerant jazz musician father (Tom Skerritt). When Dad is killed, Blue winds up under the thumb of brothel madam Wendy Hughes, and after some initial difficulty, assumes her new identity. But she pines for the boy (Brent Fraser) she met before her life went to hell, and she eventually fights to leave the addictive world of decadence she has entered. Escape will not be easy.

Writer/director Zalman King gave us t…
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Crow: Wicked Prayer, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 28th, 2005

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Synopsis

A small mining town is torn apart by strife between the workers at the toxic mine that is about to be closed down, and the Native Americans on whose land the mind is, and who are about to erect a casino over the closed facility (but won’t that make a for a dangerous contaminated entertainment complex?). Stirring up trouble is Satanist David Boreanaz and his cohorts (which include Tara Reid, whom we first see as a sniper, so you know the audience is in deep, deep trouble here). As part of a r…
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Because of Winn-Dixie

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 27th, 2005

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Synopsis

Anna Sophia Robb is a little girl named Opal, who has just arrived in the small town of Naomis with her single-parent father (Jeff Daniels), a preacher. Opal finds it hard to fit in and make new friends, until she adopts a rambunctious dog she finds in the Winn-Dixie supermarket. The dog’s extroverted nature helps make connections not only between Opal and the town, but between the townspeople as well.

A very kind little movie, but a completely unoriginal one, too. Between this and…
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Weekend at Bernie’s

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 22nd, 2005

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Synopsis

Well, considering that there were so many different strange film ideas in the 1980s, it was only a matter of time that someone write and produce a film about a dead guy, right? Well, you’re in luck, as two names from the period (Andrew McCarthy, St. Elmo’s Fire and Jonathan Silverman, Brighton Beach Memoirs) fulfill your wish as Weekend at Bernie’s finally comes to DVD.

McCarthy and Silverman play insurance reps with bigger aspirations in a owned by Bernie Lomax (Ter…
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Ice Princess

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 21st, 2005

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Synopsis

Michelle Trachetenberg is a gifted science student, and her mother (Joan Cusack), a committed feminist, is pushing her to forge her way through college. But her Trachtenberg’s true love is figure skating, and she manages to combine the two in a physics project, which opens the door to more skating for her. What to do when she turns out to be really good at skating? That or more academic pursuits? Her opposite number is Hayden Panettiere, the stuck-up blonde whose mother (Kim Cattrall) is a f…
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Bolero

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on July 21st, 2005

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Synopsis

In the 1920s, heiress Bo Derek (looking wildly anachronistic) seeks to learn the ways of ecstasy. (Don’t get mad at me. I didn’t make this up.) Accompanied by her best friend and faithful chauffeur George Kennedy (here making a huge career step down from such *ahem* highs as The Concorde: Airport ‘79), she hares off to Morocco, inspired by Valentino movies to give her virginity to a sheik. When he fails to come through in the clutch, she next turns her sights on a Spanish bullfighter….
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Hard Boiled

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 15th, 2005

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Synopsis

John Woo did not just direct Tom Cruise from a big rock in Mission Impossible:2, nor EVERY recent action movie with featuring either Nicolas Cage or John Travolta. He was only a name you heard about whenever the hot director of the moment (Quentin Tarantino comes to mind) talked about their film influences. Woo was recognized as a top directing talent before his move to the West, and is the one name people consistently mention when talking about the Hong Kong crime/action film genre. This fi…
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