Recently, I've had occasion to go back and revisit the Airport franchise. The 70s disaster movie arguably came into being with the first film (though the first pure disaster film of that era is more properly The Poseidon Adventure). If the peak of that cycle of cinematic carnage was Irwin Allen's The Towering Inferno, and its spectacularly lovable nadir is Allen's The Swarm, the Airport movies fell somewhere between the two. The best are the first (Airport itself) and third (Airport '77). The other two – Airport 1975 and The Concorde: Airport '79 – approach The Swarm's level of cosmic ineptitude.

Today, let's get back to the roots with Airport. As mentioned above, it is not, strictly speaking, a disaster movie in the same sense that the rest of the franchise entries are. Sure, there's a bomber aboard the plane piloted by Dean Martin, but the threat doesn't surface until relatively late in the film, and is but one of many intertwining storylines. The sequels would move the catastrophe very much to the centre of the action.

For a third straight year, Jim Henson’s lovable Muppets attracted some of the biggest names in show business. Who would have thought that such big stars would so eagerly agree to co-star opposite a clump of felt and fur? The show was also coming off a monster second year with acts like Elton John, Bob Hope and John Cleese. How do you follow up a year like that? Easy. You get more big names like: Roy Clark, Jean Stapleton, Liberace, Alice Cooper, Cheryl Ladd, Raquel Welch, Danny Kaye, Harry Belafonte, Sylvester Stallone, and even Roy Rogers and Dale Evans. Add to the tremendous star power more adventures of Pigs In Space, Veterinarian’s Hospital, and The Swedish Chef, and you have a decade of entertainment in one season set of The Muppets.

 

We’re in the US Marines, boys and who could have guessed that it would be so much fun? I often wondered how the real life members of The Corp think about Gomer Pyle. It would have made a great extra. I remember one of the F Troop sets offered a look at members of the real unit. With only another season to go I hope Paramount looks over the idea.

 

I’m going to admit right from the start, I hate cell phones. They’re evil, and I didn’t need a horror film to tell me about it. The world would be a safer and certainly a more courteous place without them. Just last week I was run of the highway by a Werner semi because the idiot driver was on his cell phone. So it didn’t come as any surprise that someone was bound to include them as part of a horror film. One Missed Call is simply the latest Asian Invasion film to be retooled for American audiences. What started with The Ring, which was a truly original and suspenseful film, has also given us losers like The Grudge. Unfortunately this film falls into the latter category. Believe me, I wanted so much to love this film. I was the annoying guy cheering the trailer at the local cineplex.

 

Many attempts have been made over a decade or so to imitate South Park in an attempt to cash in on the money train. So far no one has been even remotely close. The industry consensus appears to be that it’s all about crudeness and pushing the standards envelope. That couldn’t be further from the truth, and Drawn Together is proof of that. Drawn Together is wickedly foul and raunchy. The problem is that’s all there is. It started out with a clever enough idea. Let’s take several cartoon archetypes and put them in the same house, Big Brother style. The first few episodes had some genuine humor to them while poking fun at reality television and pretty much anything else that gets in the way. Before long the show just began to be how much gross-out will the public take? Like South Park, the characters in Drawn Together are potty-mouthed and antisocial, but they lack any of the charm that Parker and Stone were able to infuse into their characters. Also, like South Park, the show drops a ton of pop culture references. The difference is that in South Park there is usually context that makes the references funny, but in Drawn Together they appear to be dropped from out of the blue and serve no purpose. When one of the characters kills another, the dead guy’s mom shows up and delivers Mrs. Kitner’s line from Jaws about knowing there were sharks in the water but letting folks swim anyway. Where the heck did that come from? If this had been South Park the line would absolutely have tied in to something that actually happened to the dead guy. The writing is incoherent, and usually the show is a series of nonsequiturs. Gross for gross sake isn’t funny.

Adult Gaming, WiiWare, & The Death Knight class unveiled - Welcome to the column that discovered it was an adult one day back in 1996 and has not been heard from since known as Dare to Play the Game.

Welcome to another edition of Dare to Play the Game. 42&22. I unfortunately did not get to play my dwarf priest, except past a couple of quick quests and leveling some of my cooking & fishing. I honestly expected a slowdown with my Troll Rogue in WoW once I hit 40. Quite the opposite I guess. The game seems to get more interesting once you pass the magic mount level. My mining and blacksmithing are well over 200 (228 and 208 respectively) and my skills make me a major DPS force to any party. I even played as the main DPS for a group in Scarlet Monastery over the weekend and we did quite well. My only weak point as I consider it is my lockpicking. I'm currently at 166. I just started picking level 40 mobs that drop junkboxes that require 175. So needless to say, I need to be about 10 points higher. This weekend coming up, my focus will be on lockpicking (up to said level) and cooking. Cooking is at 223 and I hear Gadgetzan calling my name. You want Giant Eggs, Zesty Clam Meat and Alterac Swiss? Me got 'em mon!

Just in time for the release of one of the most eagerly awaited films in years comes a new box set of the Indiana Jones Adventures. The problem is that these transfers are not upgrades so, aside from squeezing out a few extra bucks, what’s the point? I’m sure that The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull will add hundreds of millions to the Paramount coffers, so this just looks like greed to me.

 

12 Angry Men is one of those rare films that appears to defy all the Hollywood constants and yet become one of the best films of its kind ever made. The setting is entirely too claustrophobic. With the exception of two bookend scenes the entire film takes place in the tight quarters of a jury deliberation room. The story had only a couple of years earlier been the subject of a live television drama, so the story was far from a fresh idea. The director was a complete unknown who had not at that point directed a major picture. Enter Henry Fonda, the only member of the cast who was a strong A list name. He was also the driving force behind getting the film made. He produced the film and was involved with most of the major decisions. With all of these elements going against it, you would expect the film to fail miserably, and that’s exactly what it did. During its premier run the film only lasted a week and was a complete financial failure. It happens all the time, and we would expect the story to end there, but it didn’t.

 

Jim Phelps (Graves) led his team in a fourth season of Mission Impossible starting in 1969. The show continued its trademark traditions. Jim would receive a mission from the “self destructing” tape and would gather his IMF (Impossible Mission Force) team. The team was necessarily eclectic in nature, and it changed significantly in the fourth season. Gone were Martin Landau in his signature role of Rollin Hand and Barbara Bain as Cinnamon Carter, model and the team’s chief seductress  Still in the team we had Barney Collier, the gadget man, played by Greg Morris. The muscle was still supplied by Willy Armitage, played by brute Peter Lupus. Leonard Nimoy joined the team in season four as Paris, who also had a skill for disguise. He was a magician, so his sleight of hand skills came in … well, handy. Together they took on missions that the government could not be officially a part of. They were always admonished that should they be caught “the secretary would disavow any knowledge” of them.  Usually they were sent somewhere to put some evil mastermind out of business. Their tactics ranged from scams to outright theft. Sometimes they were a rescue team, while other times they would infiltrate a group of bad guys. There were certainly cold war elements to the whole thing. Each week the team concocted some convoluted con to play on their mark, walking away at the end of each episode often without getting any credit or congratulations.

 

I'm very late to the party here, but I've never been shy about jumping on a bandwagon (if I might so mix my metaphors), especially one as spectacularly kitted out as this one, so allow me to add my voice to the legion who are chanting the praises of Inside (French title: A l'intérieur). Directed by Julien Maury and Alexandre Bustillo, this brutally effective piece is yet further evidence that the creative vanguard of the horror film has shifted from Asia to French-speaking Europe.

In the wake of such merciless pieces as High Tension and the Belgian Calvaire comes this even more unforgiving film. Alysson Paradis has just lost her husband in a car accident that miraculously spared her unborn child. It's Christmas Eve, the Paris suburbs are ablaze with riots, and Paradis is going to be induced the following day. She returns home from her doctor's appointment, and is just settling down when the doorbell rings. A strange woman (Betty Blue's Béatrice Dalle) asks to come in to use the phone. When Paradis, justifiably nervous, turns her down, Dalle calls her by name and demands to be let in. And so the siege begins. Before long, Dalle has made her way into the house. Her goal: to slice open Paradis' belly and steal the child.