Do you believe that a numbers wizard can predict the most random of human actions with mathematical equations so accurately as to know where and when such a person will be? If so, then I suggest you put down that letter you are writing to Santa, finish eating that egg a bunny left for you, go to your pillow and pull together all of the loot you got from the tooth fairy, and plunk it down on season three of Numb3ers. No, that’s not a typo, apparently they believe that letters aren’t good enough to stand on their own so they inserted a 3 where the e should be. Aren’t they so clever? Not. In the fairy tale world of Numb3ers, all you need is an almost obsessive knowledge of math and the crooks don’t stand a chance. It’s almost unfair, isn’t it.

Shout Factory has begun to release DVD editions of Elvira’s Movie Macabre, the cult hit TV show from the 80s wherein our curvaceous goth host makes off-colour jokes and pokes fun, during the commercial breaks, of the movies she’s showing. Up on the chopping block in this set are Gamera, Super Monster and They Came From Beyond Space.

The Simpsons announcement has dropped: December 18th is the day! Coming out on Blu-ray and DVD, both single disc releases:

The DVD Release

The Simpsons announcement has dropped: December 18th is the day! Coming out on Blu-ray and DVD, both single disc releases:

The DVD Release

Next year, YouTube plans to add 30-second bumper ads to the beginning of video clips. I visit the site infrequently to watch the latest, "you gotta see this" video, or to find trailers of older films. You think I'm going to sit through 30 seconds of crap advertising to watch some idiots launch their friend with a giant slingshot? Think again.

No word on whether the ads will be on every video, or whether ads will vary in length. No matter how you cut it, this is bad news for YouTube users, and will surely mark the end of YouTube's reign as top video-sharing site. What'll be next?

If you told me about a film by the screenwriter of Forrest Gump, The Insider and Munich, and the director who brought us L.A. Confidential, I'd say bring it on. If you went on that it was set in the high stakes world of professional poker, I'd be excited. But then you'd say it's a romance starring Eric Bana (Troy) and Drew Barrymore (Never Been Kissed). I'd begin to doubt. Then I'd think back to The Insider, and tell myself a great script is the only way to make a great film.

Then I'd watch Lucky You and realize even a great screenwriter can turn out a clunker. But maybe there'd be hope for the DVD?

“Here’s the thing about the future. If you look at it it changes, and every time you look at it it changes again…”


If Nicolas Cage had Chris Johnson’s ability to see into the future, he might have avoided his latest film, Next. At the very least he might have been tempted to monkey with it in order to get a better box office take than it ultimately received. The film was in and out of theatres faster than I could blink, let alone catch it. If Cage had foreseen the film’s demise, it would have been unfortunate for us who got to see this film on DVD for the first time.

Stop me if you’ve heard any of this before. Four teens set out on a road trip …

STOP.

OK. That’s just unfair. Let me go on a little longer.

They’re going to the “biggest party in the world” when their vehicle stalls and leaves them stranded out in the middle of nowhere…

STOP

Well. One of them is blind and they’re not all horny drug fiends.

OK. Go on.

They find an abandoned hotel and café where everyone has mysteriously disappeared…

STOP

I guess you get the idea.

2004 brought moviegoers two big-budget historical epics in Oliver Stone's Alexander and Wolfgang Petersen's Troy. One bombed. The other performed well, but was by no means heralded as a critical success. No, Troy was praised for slick production values and exciting battles, but derided for a lack of emotional depth.

Can it all be blamed on running-time constraints and compromises made for the ratings board? The answer is here, with the unrated Troy: Director's Cut, Petersen's second shot at eternal glory, this time with more than 30 minutes of additional footage.

(Since I was lucky enough to review the standard def copy of The Wedding Date, I'm going to be lazy and let you view my thoughts on this, with the audio and video updated to reflect this HD DVD copy).

I would hope that The Wedding Date, signals the end of the genre of films set around weddings. There’s nothing left to mine, the horse is very dead, and in this case, the film is rather predictable. Or to put in another way, my wife said “this film will probably be stupid, but I’ll like it”. And when I was watching parts of the film, the story was so easy to follow that I could go and make a batch of chili, come back, and still know what happened while I was away.