Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on October 6th, 2006
I admit it. I thought our heroes at Stargate Command had finally had it for sure. Were the replicators back? How about the dreaded G’Ould? Perhaps another serious malfunction of the Gate caused by Carter’s meddling was about to tear a hole in the time/space continuum. What was I so sure might spell doom for Earth’s last line of defense? We’ve already escaped fiendish bombs and other devious devices. Plagues and epidemics? No problem. Just business as usual at the SGC. No. These things are just minor worries compar...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 27th, 2006
Synopsis
Adam Sandler plays Michael Newman, stressed-out workaholic who, overwhelmed by his job though he is, is allowing it to interfere with his family life. At the end of his tether one night, he sets out to buy a universal remote, but Christopher Walken (apparently playing Christopher Lloyd) sells him a truly universal remote.
All sorts of gags involving giving the real world the rewind, pause, fast-forward and slow-motion treatment ensue, and a number are funny. But as sure as night f...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 12th, 2006
Mix two parts hip-hop artists, two parts Oscar-winning actors, one part TV actor, and one part bad actor, and what do you get? The stars of Edison Force, that’s what. Now just because I specify one as a bad actor doesn’t let the others off the hook. Of course, Kevin Spacey and Morgan Freeman are going to be tolerable. They’re phenomenal at their craft. Even the TV actor (Dylan McDermott) does a worthy job of bringing menace to his role as primary leg-breaker. But when it comes to poor performances, Cary ...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 8th, 2006
Poseidon doesn’t waste any time getting to the action so I won’t waste any time with an introduction to this review. Yes, it’s a remake of the 1972 film, The Poseidon Adventure. Yes, it is chock full of convenient cardboard characters (a former Navy man, a fireman, a nurse, etc...). But we don’t watch movies like Poseidon for character exposition, do we?
Poseidon is a rip-roaring 90 minutes of intensity and even delivers some gory goods. Yes, I said gory. I know Poseidon...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 5th, 2006
Synopsis
Anna Faris takes a job as a social worker, moving into a house with the evil presences we know and love from The Grudge. Meanwhile, next door, Craig Bierko is about to deal with The War of the Worlds. And off we go, as the movie riffs one parody of recent films after another.
At the helm is David Zucker, part of the team responsible for the Airplane! and Naked Gun films, and much the same kind of sensibility pervades this film. There’s plenty of fun, but...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 3rd, 2006
The Bone Collector tells the story of a man named Lincoln Rhyme (Denzel Washington) who has been confined to his Manhattan bed after being injured on his job by a falling beam. Lincoln has since become a Quadriplegic who simply wants to kill himself, and his nurse (Queen Latifah) is planning on assisting him in his suicide. As he is planning this, Lincoln learns of a serial killer who has been abducting random people, throwing them in a taxi and proceeding to torture them in extremely gruesome manners. Lincoln...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 23rd, 2006
Synopsis
In the mid 90's, poachers are decimating the antelope population in the pristine lands of Kekexili. The locals have organized themselves to fight back, and now one of their patrolmen has been murdered by the poachers. Ga Yu, a journalist from Beijing, arrives to cover the story. Initially rejected by the leader of the mountain patrol, Ga Yu is taken in by the group when he suggests his coverage might help turn the area into a wilderness preserve. A long, grueling, dangerous manhunt ensues.>
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 10th, 2006
Tell me if you've heard this one before... a high school girl is not allowed to join a certain club because it is boys only, so she dresses up like a (transvestite) boy to sneak into the club and prove that she has girl power!
Seriously, how many times can Hollywood make the exact same movie, before somebody sues somebody for copyright infringement? I understand the argument that each new generation of teens will pay big bucks to see the same crappy movie that has been made every couple of years for generations, but come on.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 8th, 2006
Synopsis
A group of masked criminals, led by Clive Owen, take over a Manhattan bank and hold everyone there hostage. Denzel Washington arrives on the scene as police negotiator, and he rapidly finds that his opponent is extremely clever, and appears to know every move the police will make even before they do. Complicating matters further is the arrival of Jodie Foster, an ice-cold fix-it woman hired by bank-owner Christopher Plummer to protect his interests: there is a safety deposit box he desperate...
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 4th, 2006
Synopsis
Robin Williams is struggling to keep his job, and struggling to keep his sanity in the face of his teenage children (particularly daughter Joanna “JoJo” Levesque). This all becomes more difficult when his boss forces him to cancel a trip to Hawaii and head off to Colorado instead. Williams rents an RV, packs his family in, and hits the road for misadventures and hijinx.
And everything plays out much as one would expect it to. The film looks slick enough, but it might just as well h...
