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Sony Pictures

Veggie Tales – Lord of the Beans

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 5th, 2005

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While VeggieTales: Lord of the Beans is not my thing, I can certainly see how it would connect with very small children. Parents may also throw Phil Vischer and company some appreciation for the positive messages his bunch tries to present in each VeggieTales special, but something about Vischer and crew’s latest doesn’t feel right. For one, it’s a parody — and a rather faithful one — to LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring. While it’s fine to parody, I think VeggieTales misses the point with their chosen subject matter.
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Marksman, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 4th, 2005

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Synopsis

Wesley Snipes (Major League) and straight to video really provide for several comedic moments. I don’t really know that much about Snipes, aside from some anonymous reports about just how nice he was on the set of the third Blade movie, along with the “cataract problem” he has. Nevertheless, his role in this film of the strong, silent type who is some Army special forces member provides him the chance to say a small amount of dialogue for what is presumably a lot of cash.

Th…
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Lords of Dogtown

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 22nd, 2005

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Synopsis

According to some reports, Fred Durst almost directed this thing, and if I ever wind up supporting anything Fred Durst does, I’ll kill myself. Having said that, Lords of Dogtown is a fond look back at the California skateboarding explosion in the late ‘70s. Since, like everything else, timing is everything, this film was largely neglected in a lot of circles, because it came out shortly after the outstanding documentary Dogtown and Z-Boys, which was written and directed by Stacy Peral…
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Bridge Too Far, A

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 18th, 2005

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Synopsis

Operation Market Garden is the most famous Allied defeat in the Second World War. An audacious plan scuppered by bad luck and worse decisions, it is recounted in this visually spectacular film. The goal is to seize a group of bridges across Holland, culminating in the brdge at Arnhem. Everything imaginable goes wrong. Richard Attenborough’s film stars just about every big name actor under the sun, and his re-enactment has so many extras and so much hardware that one feels he could have convi…
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And Now for Something Completely Hilarious! Collection

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 14th, 2005

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Synopsis

And Now for Something Completely Different (1971) was Monty Python’s first theatrical release, and consists of remounted, often more elaborately staged versions of many of their most beloved TV skits. You want your Dead Parrot, it’s here. So is the Lumberjack Song, How Not to Be Seen, and so on. As a one-stop intro to Python, it’s hard to beat.

Funny as the above film is, it is eclipsed in most people’s hearts by Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1974), easily the most…
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Mask of Zorro, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 9th, 2005

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The Mask of Zorro was the Pirates of the Caribbean of its day. A classic swashbuckling story packed with action and romance, yet still presented in a family-friendly style that hearkened back to the days of the old Saturday afternoon matinée. Indiana Jones was conceived in this style, as was Disney’s National Treasure, in a way. There is a ton of room in the marketplace for PG and PG-13 rated films like this, as it provides something that the whole family can not only attend at the theater, but t…
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Saving Face

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 24th, 2005

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I was dreading watching this DVD. Hmmm…indy film, Sundance film, a woman “coming out” to her family film. This had all the hallmarks of arty and annoying. Thankfully, Saving Face is not like that at all. Michelle Krusiac plays “Wil”, a surgeon, who falls hard for Vivian (Lynn Chen), a ballet dancer. Complications arise because Vivian is the daughter of Wil’s boss. Yes, there are some screwball comedy elements. But it’s all tastefully done. Joan Chen (what has she done since Twin Peaks) does a n…
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Bewitched

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 21st, 2005

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When comic book movies started becoming popular in the 90’s with Batman, The Punisher, Dick Tracy and the like, directors weren’t really sure how to handle the subject. The most popular methods involved making the film look like a comic, to help to tie the narratives together. Unfortunately, audiences soon discovered that the result of this mash-up of styles was a heavy-handed, overblown color explosion that just looked hokey (Batman Forever, anyone?) Finally, in recent years, it has been …
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Eternal

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 7th, 2005

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Synopsis

The wife of a policeman shows up at the mansion of one Elizabeth Caine (or is she Erzsebet Bathory) for a lesbian tryst, but has her neck punctured by her host. Ray, the cop, investigates his wife’s disappearance, and very quickly suspects Bathory, but has difficulty assembling proof. To make matters worse, bodies of young women start piling up, and the evidence points more and more damningly toward Ray. He is in a race to prove his innocence and stop Bathory before she kills again.

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Urban Legends: Bloody Mary

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 3rd, 2005

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Synopsis

In 1969, a group of jocks drug their dates at the homecoming dance in order to abduct them. One of them, Mary, stays sober, and is accidentally killed by her date. Thirty years later, history repeats itself when three young women are the victims of a similar revenge prank on the part of the jocks. One of the victims (Kate Mara) accidentally summons the vengeful ghost (by reciting “Bloody Mary”) and the culprits all start dying in various gruesome ways. It seems, however, that they all have s…
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Up and Down

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 26th, 2005

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Synopsis

A pair of human smugglers accidentally take off with the baby of one of the immigrants they dropped off inside the Czech republic. They bring the baby to a pawn shop, where it is subsequently sold to a woman who is so desperate to have a child that she tries to abduct someone else’s. Her husband is soccer hooligan trying to go straight. He might not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he recognizes trouble when he sees it. Meanwhile, the mother of the baby has sought help with a refugee…
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Boogeyman, The – The Original 1980 Version

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 19th, 2005

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Synopsis

A young boy murders his mother’s abusive lover while his little sister watches the act in a mirror. Years later, the siblings are grown up. The brother is mute, and the sister (Susanna Love) is haunted by nightmares of that night. Seeking to purge the past, she revisits her old home, and sees the lover in the mirror. In terror, she smashes the mirror, thus unleashing the evil contained therein. Wherever fragments of the mirror show up, terrible deaths occur.

Or at least as terrible…
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Good Times – The Complete Fifth Season

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on September 10th, 2005

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First there was no James. This year no Florida. Yes, the Sunshine State is alive and well even after a year full of hurricanes, but the lovable mother Evans is not a part of Good Times 5th season. I found these episodes to be the show’s least funny. There’s no doubt that the scripts are trying way too hard to cover the awkward situations. The addition of young Penny is really no compensation. It doesn’t help that after 5 years JJ’s shtick is beginning to show its wear. Still, there are some good moments here for the show’s legion of fans.
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Deal, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 7th, 2005

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What’s the dealio with The Deal? Well… Christian Slater’s in it. Selma Blair’s in it. What’s it about? The Deal is a thriller set in the world of insider trading and the oil market. Sounds like a bore? Well, the film is fairly knowledgable about its information. The screenplay has a lot of “insider” gobbledegook. The characters talk the talk, but can they walk the walk?

The Deal, on a thriller level, gets lost in its own plot. Tom Hanson (Christian Slater) slogs through a maz…
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Kingdom Hospital: The Beginning

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 4th, 2005

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Synopsis

Kingdome Hospital is built on the site of a former Civil War textile mill, where many children lost their lives in a tragic fire. The ground is therefore haunted, and strange things are happening in the hospital. We follow the lives of many characters here, including one particular patient, an artist who was hit by a truck (the incident is very faithful reproduction of what happened to Stephen King himself) and is haunted, in his comatose state, by visions of a supernatural anteater (I’m not…
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Hexed

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 3rd, 2005

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I can sum up this entire film in a single word; lame. There is nothing sadder than a comedy that is not funny, and this is certainly that. Bad acting, bad jokes and the feel of an 80’s comedy makes this film the very definition of lame. Imagine Blind Date without the humor. Now add blatant rip-offs from Basic Instinct and Fatal Attraction. Throw in some bad jokes and you’re ready to go.

The plot has something to do with a hotel bellhop who impersonates people for entertainment, and tells …
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Married With Children – The Complete Fourth Season

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 3rd, 2005

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Married With Children was something of an anomaly among the pantheon of breakthrough television shows throughout history. Shows such as Archie Bunker and Roseanne broke through the stereotypes of the television family, and showed life much more as it really is in most American households. What made Married With Children especially unique is that while those other shows often-times made very real comments about society through their laughter, this program mainly focused on the American mal…
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Major Dundee

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 19th, 2005

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Synopsis

Charlton Heston is the title character, a Union officer who determines on his own hook to track down a group of Apache raiders. He gathers together a ragtag group of raw recruits, criminals and Confederate prisoners, and heads off to Mexico. His second-in-command is Confederate officer Richard Harris, and the two men have a long history of mutual hatred and respect. Heston forges ahead despite all obstacles, and despite the costs both to his men and to the civilians they encounter.

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Kung Fu Hustle

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on August 12th, 2005

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Synopsis

In the 1930s, the dreaded Axe Gang is taking over all organized crime, terrorizing the city. One of the only places they don’t control is a slum complex ruled by a formidable landlady and her henpecked husband. Into this place come a couple of con artists, who pretend to be members of the Axe Gang. They set in motion an chain of events that leads to one apocalyptic battle after another, with ever more bizarre and powerful Grand Masters of Kung Fu turning to fight either for or against the Ax…
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Imaginary Heroes

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 12th, 2005

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This is one of those films that is depressing solely for the sake of being depressing. There was a string of these kinds of films in the 90’s, but they have gone out of style as of the past seven years or so. This particular film tells the story of what happens to a dysfunctional family when one of the members commits suicide. Apparently, each member of the family grieves in his or her own way, all of which are wildly dangerous. Sexual promiscuity, substance abuse, lawlessness and despair abound in this tale of miser…
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Stone Cold

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 30th, 2005

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Synopsis

Poor Tom Selleck. The guy has had to deal with the Magnum P.I. stigma for so long, whenever he tries to play darker characters in a film noir-style TV movie, people just don’t buy it, as what seems to be the case in Stone Cold.

But Selleck actually does a pretty decent job in the film, playing Jesse Stone, a chief of police in a small New England town who has to deal with a serial killing husband and wife combo. Jesse has moved from Los Angeles, where he lost his job and his…
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D.E.B.S.

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on July 9th, 2005

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Synopsis

I didn’t know what quite to expect from watching D.E.B.S. for the first time. So, it looks like a group of college girls who double as CIA assassins, right? OK, I can buy that, I mean, I’m a fan of Alias, so I can dig it. You’ve got Amy (Sara Foster, The Big Bounce), D.E.B. Academy’s top notch student with her pick of anywhere she wants to go; her friend, the tough and ambitious Max (Meagan Good, The Cookout), along with the younger Janet (Jill Ritchie, Herbie Fully L…
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School Daze

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on June 23rd, 2005

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Synopsis

The setting is a prestigious black college, and the set-up is along the lines of what you would expect in a college-set musical: conflicts between the black-uniformed frat brothers and the political activists (of which the leader is a young Laurence Fishburne), gender wars and misunderstandings right, left and centre, and plenty of music. It’s all very lively, but not nearly as funny as Lee clearly thinks it is (see notes on commentary below). The bigger question is whether the satire and po…
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Hard Eight

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on June 20th, 2005

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Synopsis

Sydney is a poker-faced professional gambler with a soft heart for a hard luck story. He plays guardian angel to unlucky John and a hooker, Clementine, whom he grows to love like family. When John and Clementine’s honeymoon night leads to a disastrous hostage situation, Sydney takes care of it, as usual. But when slick casino pro Jimmy threatens to reveal a secret from Sydney’s past that could destroy his relationship with the newlyweds, Sydney decides to hedge his bets and not leave anything to ch…
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Hitch

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on June 19th, 2005

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I was not too eager to see Hitch in the theater, thinking that DVD was just fine for a film such as this; it is after all only a romantic comedy. I was one of the few who thought this way, as Hitch killed at the box office, brining in over $175 million in its theatrical run. After seeing the film on DVD, I can see why it did so well at the box office – it is the ultimate date movie. You get a charismatic Will Smith, a funny Kevin James, and a gorgeous Eva Mendes – the perfect blend for any sure fire enjoyment by all.
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