The Reel World

Going into this film, I considered the Bourne movies to be an extremely rare breed among film franchises: each sequel was better than the movie it followed. The fantastic Bourne Ultimatum even wrapped up the Matt Damon trilogy with an ending that dovetailed perfectly with the first shot of the series. So when I heard they wanted to make another Bourne film (uh-oh) without director Paul Greengrass (uh-oh!) or star Matt Damon (UH-OH!!!), I was, to put it mildly, skeptical. After all, how can you make a Bourne movie without Jason Bourne?
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“This is going to be hard for you to believe. Whatever you think you remember, it’s not real. This person you think you are now, it’s all a lie.”

Philip Dick’s original stories We Can Remember It For You Wholesale and Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep made the pulp-age science fiction writer a household name in the 1980’s. The later title became Ridley Scott’s breakout cult classic Bladerunner, while the former title became the troubled Total Recall. I say troubled because the film went through 40 actual script rewrites, three lead actors, and several directors before it finally made it to the big screen in 1990
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With August just around the corner and the summer movie season coming to a close, this is usually the time when studios dump off the rest of their bigger-budget films before they head into the fall and begin prepping for the award season.  Occasionally we’ve been given a few gems, but for the most part there is nothing really to get too excited over.  It’s also not to favorable when a movie attempts to be released the week following an enormous blockbuster like Dark Knight Rises, but it seems The Watch has stepped up to see what monetary crumbs it can muster up from the moviegoers this weekend.
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“You think this can last? There’s a storm coming, Mr. Wayne. You and your friends better batten down the hatches, because when it hits, you’re all gonna wonder how you ever thought you could live so large and leave so little for the rest of us.”

In the spirit of full disclosure, let me state that my favorite comic book hero is Batman. As a child, even before the Sixties TV show premiered, I loved the tale of Batman. It is a story of a child who overcomes the fear and destruction of his childhood and becomes stronger because of it.
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“I love a terrible turn of events.”

Ever wonder how the continents formed and the land masses on planet earth got their present shapes? The short answer appears to be nuts. Literally, nuts. For a decade our children have been getting their geologic time lessons from the folks at Dreamworks animated feature shop. Yes, the same folks who brought us the Shrek series. Ice Age came out in 2002 and took the box office like a blizzard piling up a drift of cash that amounted to almost $180 million before it was over.
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“There’s rumor of a new species in New York.”

It would be easy to say that The Amazing Spider-Man is a remake of the first Sam Raimi Spider-Man film. It certainly looks that way. After just a single decade Sony Pictures has decided to go back to the origins of the popular comic character and pretty much start over. This film takes us back to the proverbial origin story. Once again we get to see young Peter Parker, this time played by Andrew Garfield, get bitten by that nasty spider and find himself with wonderful powers, and of, course great responsibilities.
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What if your favorite childhood toy were to not only come to life but also be your best friend for life?  This is the scenario writer/director Seth Macfarlane (creator of Family Guy and American Dad) set out to explore in his first live action venture behind the lens in this summer’s comedy Ted.  With the freedom of an R rating I was curious to see what Macfarlane would bring us and what I came away with was something of a surprise.
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“The ancients spoke of it. It is the heart of this fierce land. It is carried in the wind. Born of our legends, and when we are put to the test, it is the one thing that we must always be.”

Readers of this site already know that I have a particular fondness for most of the films that have come from Pixar. The studio pretty much invented the computer-animated feature film, and they’ve been setting the bar higher with each new release. I’ve always thought it was rather fitting that the studio ended up as part of Disney. After all, it was the Mouse House that invented the animated feature to begin with.
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“History prefers legends to men. It prefers nobility to brutality, soaring speeches to quiet deeds. History remembers the battle, and forgets the blood. However history remembers me if it remembers anything at all, it shall only remember a fraction of the truth for whatever else I am: a husband, a lawyer, a president; I shall always think of myself first and foremost as a hunter.”

It’s been almost four score and seven years ago, it seems, since there’s been a really good vampire movie.
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Ever since his departure from Saturday Night Live, Adam Sandler has become one of the most successful comedians of all time.  Granted not all of his movies have been great; in fact, some are better left forgotten, but he has a loyal fan base that will keep returning to the theater to see the funny man with hopes of the next big hit.  Sure, he had success with Grown Ups, but when looking over his films from the past decade I can’t help but wonder what happened. 
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Even those of us who enjoy movie musicals concede there’s a certain degree of eye-rolling that comes with the territory. Some of the greatest musicals of all time — from classics like Singin’ in the Rain and West Side Story to more modern hits like Chicago — are not immune to audible groans from jaded audiences whenever dialogue is interrupted by a showtune or a preposterously choreographed dance sequence.
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“First, I will take your life, my lord, then I will take your throne.”

Is it wrong for me to watch Snow White and the Huntsman and root for the evil queen? How about disagreeing with the magic mirror on the wall about Snow White (Kristen Stewart) being the fairest of them all, when Queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron) is absolutely ravishing? I’m sorry, Twihards, but Stewart isn’t even in the ballpark compared to Theron’s stunning beauty, not to mention acting chops. How do I reconcile these feelings with the fact that I thoroughly enjoyed this gothed-up version of the beloved and culturally ubiquitous Snow White fairy tale?
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“I promise you the secrets of the universe, nothing more…”

It’s been an astonishing 15 years since Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones first teamed up as Agents J and K respectively for the intergalactic police force Men In Black. The film was like a breath of fresh air. It combined top flight science fiction fantasy with whimsical humor. It was a hit at the box office, and like most wonderfully original hits it was quickly followed by a sequel that had almost none of the cleverness and freshness of the original film.
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“Aside from the sketchy van situation, if you promise that the tour is safe, I think it could be kinda cool.”

Chernobyl Diaries… so many bad choices to make and so little time. Imagine we are clueless Americans abroad in the Ukraine, so instead of visiting the major metropolitan areas, why not go on a tour of the Pripyat, the ghost town evacuated due to the Chernobyl nuclear power plant meltdown in 1987? Nothing says vacation more than exploring the scene of the worst nuclear disaster in history.
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“My dad said they’d come, said it my whole life. He said one day we’ll find them or they’d find us. Know what else he said? He said, ‘Hope I’m not around when that day comes.’”

Director Peter Berg kneels at the altar of Michael Bay and lovingly creates a clone of his most bombastic, military-fetish, slo-mo obsessed, whiplash-cut-driven movies with Battleship, based on the Hasbro (the same company behind the Transformers movies and yes, it definitely shows) board game of the same name.
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There’s obviously nothing funny about the atrocities committed by some of history’s most notorious tyrants. So why have these men proven to be such a surprisingly fertile source of comedy? Whether it’s (Puppet) Kim Jong-il crooning forlornly about being lonely (actually “ronery”) in Team America: World Police or Adolf Hitler being saluted by a chorus line of high-stepping stormtroopers in The Producers, there’s certainly a precedent for mocking these reviled figures. With The Dictator, Sacha Baron Cohen appears to be taking his patented inappropriateness to a new level.
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“They say blood is thicker than water…my name is Barnabas Collins.”

In the late 1960’s and early 1970’s Dark Shadows dominated the mid-day television landscape. I remember wanting to rush home from school each day to catch the horror soap opera. The daytime series had a little bit of something for everyone. There were the typical soap opera conventions for the mellow-dramatic housewives and other serious themes for the adults.
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“People might just need a little old fashioned.”

It goes back to the 1960’s and 1970’s, considered by many to be the Second Golden Age of Comics. That’s when Stan Lee and Jack Kirby joined forces to make Marvel the dominating face in comic books. They did it by making their heroes people we could identify with. These superheroes were often flawed and in conflict with themselves and each other. But they still always got the bad guy and saved the day. I was one of those kids.
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“What cannot be disputed is your imagination is the inspiration of a horrendous crime.”

The Raven may not be a turkey, but it doesn’t really  soar either. Director James McTeigue (V for Vendetta) attempts to fashion a historical fiction around the mysterious final five days of Edgar Allen Poe’s life. A notorious drunk and opium addict, Poe (John Cusack) careens through 19^th century Baltimore dead broke, bitter from years of writers block, and harassed by the locals for being a blustering has-been. Due to a distinct lack of social sympathy, he can’t even borrow money for a single drink
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More than any other genre — except maybe “M. Night Shyamalan movies” — romantic comedies really take a beating. We’ve all heard the complaints: “They’re safe.” “They’re predictable.” “The apartments are unrealistically amazing.” “They all star Jennifer Aniston or Katherine Heigl.” Of course, these complaints also double as the reasons why lots of people love them. (Ok, maybe not so much the part about Aniston and Heigl.) Either way, I think we can all agree that rom-coms as a whole could benefit from some sort of fresh twist or wrinkle. Think Like a Man, despite the efforts of a likable cast, is not here to provide that freshness.
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“You’ve got to control your fear.”

It appears that Greek mythology has become the fodder for a ton of movies of late. From young adult films to the hardcore action movies, audiences are getting their fill of the familiar gods and beasts from mythology lore. Some are calling it a trend or hot phase, like vampires and robots. Whatever it is, it isn’t a phase, and it isn’t merely passing through.
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