Action

Raquel Welch Collection, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on February 20th, 2004

Synopsis

A more unapologetic objectification of the female form would be hard to find than thiscollection. The camera all but drools over the form of Raquel Welch. For some, that’s reasonenough to check out these films. Fortunately, they are each worth seeing for other reasons too.(And in one case, worth seeing for all the WRONG reasons.)

A remake of 1940’s One Million B.C., Hammer Studios’ One Million YearsB.C. (1967) gave the world what is arguably the most iconic b…
Read More

Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on February 17th, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Adventurer Allan Quatermain (Richard Chamberlain) learns that his brother has disappearedin the wilderness of eastern Africa, apparently after having found a city of gold. Abandoningplans for a honeymoon trip to the US (much to the displeasure of shrill fiancée Sharon Stone),Quatermain sets off to find this city. Many perils are encountered along the way, and whenQuatermain and his doughty band find the city, they discover that it is in the tyrannical grip ofevil high pries…
Read More

Mutiny on the Bounty

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on February 9th, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

In 1787, the HMS Bounty sets sail for Tahiti. The journey is long and dangerous, but thecommander, Captain Bligh (Charles Laughton) is an extremely skilled seaman. He is also abrutal, corrupt sadist. Resentment builds amongst the crew, until finally mutiny erupts, led byfirst officer Fletcher Christian (Clark Gable).

Never mind that most of the leads are Americans playing Brits. This is one of the great seaadventures. Its release on DVD is most welcome, what with th…
Read More

Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on January 31st, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Once Upon a Time in Mexico (OUTM) is the third film in the conceptual trilogy of El Mariachi, Desperado, and OUTM. Its not a direct sequel, but you’ll recognize a lot of characters and imagery from the prior movies.

Plot: Without posting any spoilers, this is the story of CIA agent “Sands” (Depp) attempting to manipulate a military coup planned by a Mexican drug lord (Dafoe). El Mariachi (Banderas) gets caught up in the middle of after being hired by Sands, but as it turns out he’s…
Read More

Silencers, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on January 29th, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

A sinister organization called “Big O” (get it?) is plotting something to do with nuclearmissiles. The only man for the job, apparently, is Matt Helm (Dean Martin at his most greasilyrepulsive). Stella Stevens plays a woman who may be in league with the Big O, or she may begenuinely stupid, and Matt drags her along on his quest for the bad guys. The plot makes verylittle sense, the action scenes are dull, and nobody involved with this project seems to have caredvery much. M…
Read More

Wildcat Women

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on January 16th, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

The film is also known as Black Lolita because it’s protagonist (Yolanda Love) isnamed Lolita, and not because she’s underage. On the contrary, this Lolita is a karate-choppinghellion, like a downscale version of Cleopatra Jones. After her uncle is murdered by the mob, ourheroine determines to take revenge. She hooks up with centerfolds Serena and Susan Ayers andpresto: a more explicit version of Charlie’s Angels. Approached in the right frame ofmind (i.e. you…
Read More

Fist of the Red Dragon

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on January 8th, 2004

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Set during the Opium Wars in the 19th Century, Fist of the Red Dragon tells the tailof two masters of marital arts. One of them leads the battle against the opium trade. The other(played by lead Donnie Yen) is a brash, cocky young man who falls under the spell of the evilprince who rules the territory. Yen must undergo some painful experiences before he realizeswho his real enemy is.

When the fight scenes happen, they are reliably entertaining, with much by w…
Read More

Gang Tapes

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 23rd, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

I have never really seen a movie like Gang Tapes, a sort-of urban mockumentary told in the first-person through a digital camcorder. The Blair Witch Project is all that really comes close, and even that is not exactly the same thing. The film begins with home video footage of a family on vacation in Hollywood, but once they are carjacked, the family video camera falls into the hands of a 14 year old kid in urban Los Angeles. With this camera, he chronicles his adventures with the other boys and young me…
Read More

Tapped Out

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 22nd, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Tapped Out is an independent film starring Georgio. It is also produced, written and directed by Georgio. The film is adapted from a story by Georgio. Oh, and the music supervisor is this guy named Georgio; maybe you’ve heard of him?

Honestly, it doesn’t really mater if you have heard of him or not (though you probably haven’t), my point has already been made. In previous reviews, I have stated my distrust of independent films that put too much power in the hands of one man, especially when that one …
Read More

Shadow Fury

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 20th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

I often wonder what would make a good actor star in a bad film. Of course, the true answer almost always involves money, but I still hold out the hope that there is a greater purpose behind these little thespian mysteries. Did the actor know ahead of time that it was going to be a bad film? Was it a risk that just didn’t pay off? Did he owe someone a favor? Just what exactly would cause an actor to put his career at risk for a paycheck?

Shadow Fury boasts Karate Kid’s Pat Morita on it’s front-…
Read More

Adventures of Captain Marvel, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 20th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

In a lost valley of Siam (which looks strangely like Southern California), an archaeologicalteam breaks open the ancient tomb of the Scorpion. Young Billy Batson doesn’t like thedesecration and turns away. Because he does not join in, the ancient wizard Shazam appearsbefore him and blesses him with incredible powers. Now, whenever Billy says “Shazam!” he isbecomes the Superman-clone Captain Marvel. Meanwhile, a hooded villain (the Scorpion, ofcourse), has designs on …
Read More

Black Dragon

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 18th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

In 1930s Hong Kong, down-on-his-luck Jackie Chan buys a rose from flower seller, whopromises the rose will bring him luck. No sooner has she said this than our hero winds up smackdab in the middle of a gang war, and the next thing he knows, he’s become the new boss. Inbetween difficulties with a rival gang, Chan rewards the woman to whom he attributes his changein fortune by setting her up in a grand hotel so she can impress her daughter, who is arriving fromShanghai…
Read More

My Lucky Stars

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 18th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Jackie Chan and partner Yuen Biao are in Tokyo, tracking down a bent Hong Kong cop. Thisvillain has teamed up with a Yakuza boss and his army of Ninjas, and Biao is captured. Indesperation, Chan gets hold of his superior officer and asks him to assemble his childhoodfriends. As these losers are all petty criminals, Chan reasons that they’ll be able to get close to theYakuza without being suspected.

If the above logic sounds a little shaky, it is. The storylin…
Read More

So Close

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 15th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Shu Qi and Zhao Wei are sisters who, after the murder of their parents, have become a top-of-the-line assassination-for-hire team, combining martial arts and weapons expertise with acomputer program that allows them to tap into any closed-circuit camera anywhere on Earth.Karen Wok is the tough-as-nails detective who is on their trail. All three women run afoul of acorrupt businessman who wants them dead.

The Charlie’s Angels can only wish they were thi…
Read More

Eastern Condors

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 15th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

The year is 1976, and the Vietnam war has just ended. In a Dirty Dozen-style plotdevelopment, ten military prisoners are recruited to be flown into Vietnam to blow up a depotof missiles abandoned by the US army. Heading up the motley crew is the unjustly convictedSammo Hung. In-country, then hook up with female Cambodian guerillas. No one, other thanthe colonel leading the mission, knows precisely what their orders are.

What follows is a stirring serie…
Read More

Heart of Dragon

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 14th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Jackie Chan is a police officer. His girlfriend wants him to commit, but he wants to becomea sailor. The real complication in his life is his brother, Sammo Hung, who, though almost 30,has the mind of a small child. Chan must put his dreams on hold in order to look after hisbrother, and his resentment grows. His loyalty is put to the test, however, when Hunginadvertently runs afoul of the both the mob and the police.

If you’re hoping for another Jackie Chan a…
Read More

Grabbed By The Ghoulies (Xbox)

Posted in Game Reviews by Archive Authors on December 12th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

While out on a romantic walk with your girlfriend, she’s grabbed by a group of ghoulies. Now you’ve got to rescue her, not the most original storyline out there but it works for the type of game that this is. On your search-and-rescue mission, you take the role of a young boy named Cooper who needs to go to Ghoulhaven Hall, a haunted house to rescue the fair damsel. Pretty simple stuff.

Graphics

The game uses cel-shading graphics which create a comic type feel for it which works well for …
Read More

In the Line of Duty 4

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 11th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Detectives Cynthia Khan and Donnie Yen are trying to break up a drug ring. The actionbegins in Seattle, where a bust goes wrong and Yen’s partner is killed by a CIA agent. Witness tothis is a dock worker, who becomes a prime suspect in the killing, and flees to Hong Kong. Khanand Yen follow, not yet realizing that they have a traitor in their midst.

I have no idea if the plot actually makes any sense, and frankly, I don’t care. It serves itspurpose, which is …
Read More

Pirates of the Caribbean – The Curse of the Black Pearl

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 11th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Based on a ride at Disneyland, you probably would not have expected much except for the fact that you have Johnny Depp and Geoffrey Rush cast as the leads. The Black Pearl is a mysterious pirate ship half old-wives-tale half ghost story. Geoffery Rush plays Captain Barbossa the captain of the Black Pearl he sails the seas in search of every last piece of cursed Aztec gold to try and free himself and his mates. Johnny Depp plays the roguish Captain Jack Sparrow (the acting for this part was based on Keith Richards) on…
Read More

Belly of the Beast

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 9th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

Former secret ops man Steven Seagal’s daughter is kidnapped while on holiday in Thailand.Sagal, looking for all the world like a constipated Buddha, comes to Thailand to rescue her. Theauthorities believe a terrorist group called the Abu Karaf are responsible (people claiming to bethem have sent in a tape of their demands), but Seagal is not so sure. A lot of people will bebeaten up and shot before he unearths the truth.

The plot is both meandering and hard t…
Read More

Medallion, The

Posted in Disc Reviews by David Annandale on December 9th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Synopsis

The plot, such as it is, involves a mysterious medallion that, wielded by its child guardian,can convey supernatural power and eternal life. Julian Sands, phoning in a Creepy English BadGuy performance, wants the child and the medallion. He goes after the child first in Hong Kong,and then in Dublin (where, strangely, we do not encounter a single Irish person). Opposing himare Interpol agents Jackie Chan, Claire Forlani, and a bumbling Lee Evans. Chan is killedmidway …
Read More

League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Widescreen Edition)

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 26th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (LXG) might best be described as a Movie of Bizarre Moments. Attempting to blend Gothic Batman imagery with an Indiana Jones cast, director Stephen Norrington shows his relative newness to directing. The film is at times awkward and unbalanced, but overall entertaining and visually impressive enough to justify watching.

The Plot: The story of LXG is an interesting one. A band of miscellaneous folk hero’s and mythological urban characters are brought together to f…
Read More

Lara Croft Tomb Raider – The Cradle of Life

Posted in Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 25th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

The Tomb Raider film franchise was based on the popular adventure video game. This second Tomb Raider film, however, owes more to Indiana Jones and James Bond than anything else. Cradle of Life does an excellent job of moving along an adventure story. With exotic locations in Africa and China, Lara Croft has plenty of opportunities to show case her Bond-like bag of gadgets. Critics didn’t like this film much, but then again most film critics don’t seem to appreciate a film as a thrill ride.
Read More

Crimson Skies: High Road to Revenge (Xbox)

Posted in Game Reviews by Archive Authors on November 23rd, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

Crimson Skies had a previous incarnation as a cult favorite PC game of the same name and was in development for a port to the X-Box that was being rushed for release 1 year ago. Thank goodness that they waited because you know what they say…”Good things come to those who wait.” And man, was this game worth the wait! The original version was a toned down, arcade style shooter that would have no lasting appeal. This final version is anything but toned down.

Graphics

Crimson Skies is simply st…
Read More

Bad Boys II

Posted in Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on November 19th, 2003

Buy at Amazon.com

If you like a high-energy action/comedy, you have met your match with Bad Boys II. Michael Bay has once again created a wonderful cinematic experience with this film. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence have never been funnier; they have the best on-screen chemistry I have seen in a while. This sequel has more action then its predecessor, and is much more graphic… in a good way. Bad Boys was a great film that started Bay’s career, and Bad Boys II continues his legacy of high-energy action flicks.

”The…
Read More

«< 22 23 24 25 26 >»