Drama

I have no idea what critics thought of this film. I don't know how it did at the box office. I can't even recall knowing anything about it, except for seeing its title on the showtimes board at the theatre. It doesn't matter. I'm telling you now, Reign Over Me is a wonderful film.

I'm in one of those situations when I've discovered a really special movie, and want to recommend it to everyone I know without telling them anything about it. I'm not sure whether I can get away with that here, but I'll try. Let's talk about the DVD. Does it give Reign Over Me a fair shake? Read on to find out.

Do you believe that a numbers wizard can predict the most random of human actions with mathematical equations so accurately as to know where and when such a person will be? If so, then I suggest you put down that letter you are writing to Santa, finish eating that egg a bunny left for you, go to your pillow and pull together all of the loot you got from the tooth fairy, and plunk it down on season three of Numb3ers. No, that’s not a typo, apparently they believe that letters aren’t good enough to stand on their own so they inserted a 3 where the e should be. Aren’t they so clever? Not. In the fairy tale world of Numb3ers, all you need is an almost obsessive knowledge of math and the crooks don’t stand a chance. It’s almost unfair, isn’t it. Those poor criminals go about their carefully plotted crimes, unaware that everything they do is controlled by math. They live their lives oblivious to the fact they are at the mercy of a diabolical equation which forces their every move. In fact, I suspect some clever attorney somewhere is already preparing the “math made me do it” defense at this very moment. Soon our justice system will be forced to account for this undeniable force on our very destinies. I would go on but I can’t… must… fight… numbers

If you told me about a film by the screenwriter of Forrest Gump, The Insider and Munich, and the director who brought us L.A. Confidential, I'd say bring it on. If you went on that it was set in the high stakes world of professional poker, I'd be excited. But then you'd say it's a romance starring Eric Bana (Troy) and Drew Barrymore (Never Been Kissed). I'd begin to doubt. Then I'd think back to The Insider, and tell myself a great script is the only way to make a great film.

Then I'd watch Lucky You and realize even a great screenwriter can turn out a clunker. But maybe there'd be hope for the DVD?

2004 brought moviegoers two big-budget historical epics in Oliver Stone's Alexander and Wolfgang Petersen's Troy. One bombed. The other performed well, but was by no means heralded as a critical success. No, Troy was praised for slick production values and exciting battles, but derided for a lack of emotional depth.

Can it all be blamed on running-time constraints and compromises made for the ratings board? The answer is here, with the unrated Troy: Director's Cut, Petersen's second shot at eternal glory, this time with more than 30 minutes of additional footage.

What would happen if a studio was so confident in a show that it offered the DVD’s at a reduced price and slapped on a money back guarantee? Universal has done just that with Friday Night Lights. There is a rebate program where you can turn your discs back in for a full refund if you’re not completely satisfied with the show. Couple that with the fact I picked up this entire season for only 20 bucks, and I’d say somebody is either really stupid, or they’ve got a hell of a television series. Friday Night Lights is the latter.

If it’s 1977, this must be softcore, and so it is. Vanessa is a another lush sexual travelogue, dug up from the archives and given a rather spiffy release from Severin. Yet another product cast in the Emmanuelle mould, Vanessa has its titular heroine leave her convent home (gee, what sort of nonsense do you think we find out happened there?) after she comes into a large inheritance. Flying to Hong Kong, she finds out that this inheritance consists of a chain of high-end brothels. Cue the exotic locations and varied sexual encounters. There’s nothing hugely striking or original about any of this, but as an example its type, it’s quite handsomely mounted, makes some eyebrow-raising use of classical music, and has a couple of scenes that (almost) reach a (kind of) frenzy (all proportions maintained).

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Detective “Iron” Mike Stone (Karl Malden) is a seasoned veteran of the San Francisco Police Department. He’s an old fashioned no nonsense detective whose life has taken some bitter turns of late. Much to his aggravation he gets partnered with Keller (Michael Douglas), a green detective who hasn’t lost his belief that he can make a difference. Together they just might be able to teach each other something. Before long the two develop a teacher/mentor relationship that works well enough to solve the cases and get the bad guys.

My mother was a big fan of The Untouchables. I think she really just had a crush on Robert Stack. Years later when Stack was hosting Unsolved Mysteries, I could swear that I heard her murmur a few Ness lines under her breath. I was entirely too young to remember even the syndicated run that my mother was watching in the late 1960’s. Under more normal circumstances that would not matter as I could introduce myself to this world with the DVD release. That was before 1987, and the release of Brian De Palma’s classic film. Honestly, I simply can’t watch these episodes without thinking of that movie. For an entire generation that film has defined these characters and that time. It’s unfortunate, really, because this 1960 series had a lot going for it, particularly when you look at what else was on television at that time. Never before had such brutal violence in such a starkly real world graced the black and white sets of America. When I read articles about the controversy surrounding these depictions, I am forced to smile a little. By today’s standards these shows are quite tame. Still, the flurry of protests the show spawned were quite real. Italians were also vocal in their belief that the show went too far in portraying nearly every bad guy as being of Italian descent. I have to admit some of these accents make Father Sarducci sound good. Complaints went as far as the US Attorney General. My, have things changed. I am also of Italian heritage and gladly sit down to an hour of Tony Soprano eating it up about as fast as a bowl of tortellini and gravy. While there are still those of us who feel racially exploited, most of us embrace the mob mythology of The Godfather and Goodfellas. We can accept the difference between reality and fantasy. And so I watch these episodes as if I were some remote viewer, not only from a different time but a different place.

As any respectable history professor will tell you, if you want to learn about our past you should watch Hollywood historical fiction. That explains why MGM’s College Essentials: History 101 features Platoon – Special Edition, Windtalkers and Dances With Wolves. All three are clearly excellent examples of thoroughly accurate representations of historical conflicts, right?

Alright, so maybe educational impact isn’t the intention here. This is just MGM’s way of unloading some sub-par discs on unsuspecting buyers. What’s wrong with getting three movies for the price of one, you ask? Nothing. Unless one disc is out-dated and the other two should be incinerated by a giant laser.