Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on January 26th, 2010
"Hello. I want to play a game."
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on January 22nd, 2010
One of the lesser-known, but more visible, provisions of the Obama administration's stimulus bill is the provision that there must be at least one Sandra Bullock movie in the theatres at all times, regardless of quality. So now, as Bullock collects awards for her turn in the enormously profitable The Blind Side, here is the summer's offering making its home video debut. Our heroine this time around is a deeply eccentric crossword creator whose social skills are somewhere south of Pee-Wee Herman's. Her parents set her up on a blind date with TV news cameraman Bradley Cooper. She is immediately smitten. He is immediately terrified. He heads out on the road, working with reporter Thomas Haden Church. Faster than you can say “restraining order,” Bullock takes off after him. Cue the merry cross-country picaresque chase.
Never let it be said that Sandra Bullock is anything less than gifted when it comes to physical comedy. Her amorous lunge for Cooper, brought up short by a seat belt, is one for the books, echoing the dog-on-a-chain gag from Looney Tunes. She is also very good at inhabiting characters, and she does so very well here. Too well, in fact, as she very convincingly creates a protagonist you wouldn't be able to stand being around for five minutes, let alone the 99 of the movie. Yes, the film is aware of its creepy premise, and yes, it allows a tiny (very tiny) measure of realism to squeeze into the fantasy of its finale, but for the most part, this is a flat, unengaging and unsympathetic would-be romantic comedy.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on January 11th, 2010
"Every day I get letters. I think I get more letters than Santa Claus, Zac Efron, and Dr. Phil combined. I'm kinda the shit. Sometimes the letters are from people who say they are praying for me. They tell me everything will be OK if I just accept Jesus Christ into my heart. I say the words, but nothing ever happens. Nobody comes back. Nobody gets off the cross."
There hasn't been this much hype for a mainstream horror film in quite a long time that I can recollect. Certainly, quite a few have created more buzz after their release and subsequent box office power. But this one was supposed to be the real deal. It didn't hurt that the titular body in question would belong to Megan Fox. With the huge dominance of the Transformers films at movie theaters across the globe, Fox has had a lot of ... eh ... exposure over the last couple of years. She's made a ton of those “sexiest” polls, and combined with this somewhat provocative title, I'm sure there were expectations of, at least, reasonably large draw. Unfortunately, it just never happened. The film barely made back its modest $16 million budget.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on January 7th, 2010
High school was a nightmare for me, I try to forget most of it. For me, there was no 10 year high school reunion and I was glad I never went. Speaking of ten & high school, this is the 10th year anniversary of 10 Things I Hate About You, a Gil Junger comedy that helped launch quite a few careers. As such, they made the leap to Blu-Ray with a well-done anniversary edition. But how does the movie hold up?
Cameron James (played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is new to Padua High School. He is assigned another student, Michael Eckman (played by David Krumholtz) to show him around. Michael introduces him to the various groups of kids and they start to develop a friendship. Cameron then spots a girl, Bianca Stratford (played by Larisa Oleynik) and his life would never be the same.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 30th, 2009
It seems to be commonly believed that Robin Williams’ acting career took an abrupt change from outlandish, eccentric comedic choices (Aladdin) to more dark, complex and satirical roles in the early ‘00s (Death to Smoochy). But Williams has always played both ends of the spectrum and roughly everything in between. He channeled a father willing to do whatever it takes to reconnect with his children in the 1993 classic Mrs. Doubtfire, a role that nabbed him a Golden Globe Award for Best Actor in a Comedy. In writer and director Bobcat Goldthwait’s latest film, Williams once again plays a single dad, but this time he’s struggling to raise his crude, sex-obsessed teenage son.
Lance Clayton (Williams) is a high school poetry teacher whose class receives little interest from the student body and even less faith from the administration. He’s involved in a secret relationship with the perky, much-younger art teacher, Claire (Alexie Gilmore), and is constantly reminded of his own insecurities as a boyfriend — and rejected author — when Claire starts getting close to hot-shot English teacher Mike (Henry Simmons).
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on December 29th, 2009
By day, this reviewer is not just a writer but a glorified cubicle jockey. For lack of a detailed job description, I am a computer software administrator. So as many cubicle jockeys, I've watched Office Space. To be honest, I'm not in love with it. I did find it mildly funny and there were a few “I've been in that situation before” moments. But interestingly enough, I was pretty excited to see Extract (Mike Judge had directed both). Perhaps it was my infatuation with Mila Kunis or seeing how Jason Bateman has progressed in comedic films or maybe I just wanted to see Ben Affleck in a full grown beard.
Joel (played by Jason Bateman) built the Reynolds extract factory from the ground up. His is still in charge of the factory but does yearn to sell the factory to somebody like General Mills and retire. However, he has other issues more pressing at the moment. His wife, Suzie (played by Kristen Wiig) works at home and once she puts on the sweat pants (8pm), Jason has no chance of getting any from his wife.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on December 15th, 2009
"For years, we've been putting a secret into the heart of every member of the Saberling Family. Be it the cryogenic refrigerator or the microwave heated coffee maker. A Secret which is at the core of any successful family: Communication."
When director Hoyt Yeatman's son Hoyt, Junior, got a pet guinea pig, he began to put soldier-like gear on the unfortunate animal and imagine stories that the rodent was part of a secret spy ring. He would imagine all kinds of missions for the little guy. Thus was born the idea for G Force. Yeatman took the idea to Jerry Bruckheimer, who in turn shopped the idea to Disney. Before you know it, Bruckheimer had put his extensive resources into making the next cute talking animal film for the Mouse House.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on December 15th, 2009
Janky is a term that means shady or dishonest. An adjective that is anything but tasteful. Throw that in with the noun promoters and what you have is possibly the biggest revelation since somebody discovered Jon & Kate would have marital issues with eight children & a camera crew running around. Oh really? So, when I received Janky Promoters in the mail with Ice Cube and Mike Epps smiling ear to ear, all I could think was “Janky Promoters indeed.”
Russell Redds (played by Ice Cube) is an entertainment promoter. He has a fiancée named Loli (played by Jowharah Jones) who he plans to take to Aruba. He also has a kid named Seymour (played by Little JJ) who has aspirations of being a young rapper. It sounds like the perfect family but yet there are more than a few kinks in this scenario.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 24th, 2009
“You got everything money can buy, except what it can’t. It’s pride. Pride is what got you here. Losing is what brung you back. But, people like you, they need to be tested. They need a challenge.”
There have been a ton of boxing films. They’ve been popular going back to the Silent Era. Most of them have many of the same themes. But there was always something about Rocky that stood out above all of the rest. That “something” can’t really be described or defined. As the Supreme Court once said about the definition of obscenity: “I can’t define it, but I know it when I see it.” That’s all you can say about Rocky. Some might call it heart. That’s about as good a word for it as anything else. Rocky himself would call it “stuff in the basement”. It almost demeans it to put a word on it at all. Whatever you call it, you don’t necessarily see it in Rocky … you feel it.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on November 24th, 2009
Do you know what’s worse than watching a bad movie? It has to be watching three bad movies. Worse than that is watching three bad movies where it’s obvious to everyone involved in the films that they know they’re bad movies. It doesn’t take long until you begin to think that you’re the one everyone is really laughing about. You can picture a couple members of the cast sitting with the director all laughing their rear ends off at the poor rube who actually spends good money, and more importantly, their time, watching the piece of crap you just dropped into their DVD or Blu-ray player. It’ll take forever to get that stink out of my home theater.
Lately there has been a push to avoid crowds. There’s the whole H1N1 scare out there. Even the Vice-President says he wouldn’t be caught out in a crowd for nothing right now. Way to give us confidence there, Joe. If you too are afraid of crowds, going to a Kevin Smith film is the surest way to avoid them. I have been told by a few, and I do mean very few, Kevin Smith fans I’ve talked to that it’s not at all that the films suck. The problem, so they say, is that I just don’t get it. The idea is that Smith is some kind of artistic genius and a pedestrian reviewer like myself just doesn’t have the sophistication to understand his superior humor. I know that people like Smith likely believe it’s true. But, if I’m the one who just doesn’t get it, I’m not alone. The only folks who are alone are the unfortunate saps that went to see these films at the box office. The numbers don’t lie. These films fared horribly, and that’s being generous. The second Smithite argument is that, while the box office results were indeed pitiful, the films themselves were very low budget, so they did make more than they cost. Another bogus argument. No budget films have taken the world by storm. Look at the recent success of Paranormal Activity. That film cost less than any of these movies, a modest $15,000, and has raked in nearly a $150 million in box. Clerks pulled in just over $3 million. Chasing Amy just about $12 million. Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back broke the bank at just about $30 million. None of the films broke the top 100 for the year in which they were released. Yeah, I don’t get it. Apparently, a lot of people don’t get it.