Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 12th, 2008
“Klaatu Berada Nikto…”
As a fan of Sam Raimi’s Army of Darkness, I just had to do that. But Raimi’s masterpiece is not the subject of this article; rather a concerned alien visitor in the classic science fiction film The Day the Earth Stood Still, now available on 2-disc special edition DVD from Twentieth Century Fox. No doubt the spawn of a marketing machine looking to cash in on the remake starring Keanu Reeves, this release should still be a welcome addition to the shelf of any classic cinema fan.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 10th, 2008
The worst thing about The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe is that it followed the most successful fantasy film trilogy of all time. Just two years after Return of the King blew us away in theatres and swept the Oscars, and only one year after the flagship Extended Edition release set a new standard for DVD excellence, ‘Wardrobe promised the return of high fantasy to theatres near us. Unfortunately, it proved to be nowhere near adequate for any Lord of the Rings comparison. It was sweet, non-threatening and even a little campy, where Peter Jackson’s films had been majestic, serious and polished – one fluffy, the other dramatic.
When The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian hit theatres in late 2007, I hoped it would offer a more mature Narnia, but I wasn’t too optimistic (these are supposed to be child-friendly, after all). Imagine my pleasant surprise early on when Trumpkin uttered this to the four child heroes: ”You may find Narnia a more savage place than you remember.”
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 5th, 2008
High art it isn’t, but one thing’s for sure: Dynasty is ass-in-seat television. Launched in 1981, the John Forsythe-Linda Evans-Joan Collins starring vehicle crossed lines and took chances few of its contemporaries were willing to take. For several years Dynasty defied conservative conventions with sordid tales of extramarital affairs, catfights, and the hot-button issue of homosexual parenting. It’s this last issue that is featured so prominently in Dynasty – The Third Season, Volume Two.
Those of you who are uninitiated to the Dynasty saga have nothing to fear, as each script is weighted heavily with expository dialogue sure to catch you up in no time. (“If Blake loves you, Krystle, then why did he humiliate you by castigating you that day we fought in the lily pond” – Alexis Colby) Of course, the show’s quality suffers as a result, offering ridiculous conversations involving participants who should damn well know exactly what just happened to them, especially considering the weight of their experiences, without the need of another character explaining things. In fact, about 40-50% of every conversation is retread from a previous episode. Incidentally, the acting is terrible, but one must wonder if the actors could have done any better with the material they were given. While exposition can certainly be a necessity, especially in an hour-long ongoing series, the convention is best used in very small doses at the beginning of a story, not throughout every segment between the commercial breaks.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 3rd, 2008
One of the hardest parts of reviewing DVD’s for this site is getting dropped in to the middle of a show I neither followed nor cared to follow and being told to judge fairly and objectively. Getting one’s bearings can be the toughest part of such a task, but this I will attempt to do with Seventh Heaven – The Seventh Season. As if playing catch-up with only one season to go on isn’t enough, the series hurls character after character at the unsuspecting viewer at a furious pace. It’s the type of show one should really get in on at the ground floor to get the most out of it, and I am keeping this in mind as I say most of these characters are profoundly obnoxious.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on December 2nd, 2008
What kind of woman could possibly make the oh-so-tough Arthur Fonzarelli fall hopelessly in love? We find out in the three-part opener of Happy Days – The Complete Fourth Season in one of the great names of the small screen, Pinky Tuscadero. Pinky (a stunning Roz Kelly) shows spunk as a female version of Fonzy (Henry Winkler in his career-making role), and it’s surprising she wasn’t used more in the series run. Perhaps CBS felt fettering Fonzy with a regular gal-pal took away from his enigmatic qualities, which he would eventually lose anyway in the show’s eleven seasons.
Posted in: News and Opinions, Site News by Archive Authors on December 1st, 2008
Since starting UpcomingDiscs.com almost eight years ago, Rod and I have done our best to grow UpcomingDiscs into something that we are very proud of. In the last year or so, with many other ventures taking up our time, we have not giving UpcomingDiscs the time and effort that it deserves. Therefore, it is with mixed emotions that I announce that we have sold UpcomingDiscs.com.
While it was a hard decision to come to, we feel that we have sold the sites to someone who has the passion and drive to take these sites to the next level – Gino Sassani – who will take ownership of UpcomingDiscs.com effective immediately. We have complete faith in Gino and his ability to return UpcomingDiscs back to its glory days… and we ask that you stay along for the ride.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 6th, 2008
I like Mike Myers. I think he’s really talented, and I’ve enjoyed him in films like Wayne’s World, So I Married an Axe Murderer and Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery. That’s why I didn’t want to see The Love Guru. Seeing the trailers for this latest Myers project, I had the distinct feeling it was going to be a black mark on his filmography.
What an understatement — 20 minutes into The Love Guru, I wanted to punch Mike Myers in the face.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 22nd, 2008
When I was a kid, I loved Archie comics. Before every family road trip (at least once a year), my mom would head to the grocery store and buy up all of the latest issues of everything from Jughead to Little Archie. We amassed quite the collection, and I read those things over and over for years. Recently, in a moment of nostalgia, I bought a new issue. I was excited to see what my old pals the Riverdale gang were up to — boy, was I disappointed. I knew nearly all of the stories! They barely did anything to hide the fact that they were reruns, simply transplanting plots from summer to winter, or changing from basketball to volleyball. What a crock.
Speaking of reruns, you'll recognize Made of Honor as My Best Friend's Wedding with a dash of When Harry Met Sally. I know it's a well-established Hollywood tradition to rehash plots from past successes, but this chick flick was marketed as something fresh. Right. It's a good thing fans of rom-coms don't mind watching the same story over and over. And over.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on September 22nd, 2008
I've got this great idea for a new show: it's about a group of people stranded on a mysterious island after a plane crash. I'll call it Where Are We? It's gonna be the biggest ratings hit ever for whichever network is lucky enough to lavishly reward my creative genius.
On the other hand, it might seem like a complete ripoff of Lost, a rehash, old news that will never live up to the glory of the original. You know, like Cashmere Mafia, the Lucy Liu vehicle modeled gene-by-gene on HBO's mega-hit Sex and the City. It might only last seven episodes before it's axed. Now on DVD for the first time, Cashmere Mafia: The Complete Series is further proof that the entertainment industry is all out of fresh ideas.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on August 8th, 2008
Why god must you do this? Why does Hollywood in all its limited wisdom try to remake any and everything with the hopes that it will be good, when it just winds up becoming another EPIC FAIL? They’ve done it with The Grudge, they’ve done it with The Eye, and now I hear they might be remaking Oldboy and The Host. We’re coming up on sacred cow territory here, and quite frankly, I don’t know why these films have to be “Americanized” to appeal to the unwashed masses; I thought the whole point of them was to be appreciated on their own merits. But sure enough, the horror film genre is guilty of cannibalizing product like anyone else. See what I did there?
Moving on, The Eye is based on the 2002 Hong Kong film Gin gwai, but Tom Cruise’s CW Production studio bought the American rights, and Sebastian Gutierrez (Snakes on a Plane) adapted the screenplay for American audiences, in a film that David Moreau and Xavier Palud (Them) directed. Sydney Wells (Jessica Alba, The Love Guru) is a classically trained violinist who has been blind most of her life. Upon receiving a corneal transplant (the eyes people, work with me here), she starts to see visions that shock and terrify her. Her sister Helen (Parker Posey, Best In Show) doesn’t know what to do for her, and her doctor (Alessandro Nivola, Grace is Gone) thinks she’s crazy, even though she walks around with strange markings on her hands and arms. So she tries to find out where her donor eyes came from, and the person who had them before saw unimaginable horror, and those visions are transferred to Sydney.
