Beauty & The Briefcase (Blu-Ray)

My dislike of romantic comedies has been well documented on this site time and time again. At times, I even try to enlist the help of my loving wife who doesn’t really care for them either but is willing to lend a hand. Unfortunately, my next three reviews will all involve the curse of the romantic comedy. So let’s take a look inside and see if we can last through this trilogy of terror.

Lane Daniels (played by Hilary Duff) is a fashion journalist in New York City in search of a guy. Scared yet? I mean it is Hilary Duff. I heard she once bit the head of an eyeliner pencil off and swallowed it whole. Lane’s best friend, Joanna (played by Amanda Walsh) tries to help but the main problem is that Lane has this insane checklist.

Does this checklist involve such points as a pale exterior and a chest that sparkles like diamonds? No (somewhere Robert Pattinson weeps), but it does involve such things as a thick accent and spontaneous traveling. Anyway, things start to change when Joanna gets a possible writing gig with Cosmo for Lane. Excited, Lane eyes her lip gloss suggestively and heads on down to the pitch session.

There Lane meets the editor, Kate White (played by Jaime Pressly who has bitten off plenty of things in her time). Lane doesn’t do so good with her pitch until they brush on her not so active love life. The two formulate a plan for Lane to infiltrate the business world and date as many suits as she can in an effort to find her magic man. I assume this can only mean Chris Angel and a lot of mindfreaking.

So, Lane decides to go down to an investment firm and try to get a job. Due to some embellishing and creative computer testing, she ends up getting the position. There she meets her boss, Tom (played by Michael McMillian) and a whole bunch of guys in suits (but no Chris Angel). In fact, she starts dating those men in an attempt to find that magic man and maybe learn some hand signals too.

But none of these guys are really the magic man even ones like Seth (played by Matt Dallas) who has an acute sense of fashion sense. (He dresses in festive colors and was last seen showing off his lack of a bellybutton) So while Lane tries to help Seth find out where he came from by playing tonsil hockey, she tries to write her article. But that all changes the day she finds Liam (played by Chris Carmack), a music producer and definitely not wearing a suit.

In this “horror”ible romantic comedy, we get Hilary Duff who is becoming pretty famous for her Disney appeal and philanthropy. The problem is, you get the idea that she isn’t really acting but playing up her Cinderella persona. The supporting cast of characters are a predictable bunch that do nothing but play the part of second fiddle. It’s a Duff vehicle and we are all out of beer.

However, there are a few nice touches here and there and while we still get a happy ending, it isn’t exactly the one we were expecting about halfway into the movie. So I will give it that. But despite some clever writing, it is still a sapfest and mostly an excuse to parade Hilary Duff around an office so she can turn it all cutsie with colorful visuals and beaded curtains. Oh yeah, and be sure to watch for the “Save the Planet” pandering. Because we all know that recyclable paper is the answer to saving money.

Video

The video is in 1.78:1 widescreen presentation in 1080p resolution. As expected, Hilary Duff is pretty easy on the eyes as are most of the actors are in this film. There is a good use of color and it is a nice looking film. It’s about as good as you would expect a film like this to look. I’m pretty Cosmo would approve but then again they are also the magazine who think saving the planet involves reusing those tree air-freshners.

Audio

For the audio portion, we get a 5.1 English DTS-HD track. The audio is limited to strictly dialogue and at least it is pretty clear. Even Liam with his thick accent is no difficult task to interpret. There are no sound effects to really speak of, so don’t expect your surrounds to get any work out. It’s basically an average HD audio presentation. Subtitles are included for English SDH and Spanish.

Final Thoughts

Round one of my tree of woe is over. I’ve dealt with the Lochness monster known as Hilary Duff and lived to tell the tale. It’s one that involves plenty of reasons to make fun of Cosmo as a credible magazine and even more reasons to make fun of the Disney princess as a credible actress. Despite a tidbit of clever writing, it can’t save this romantic torture. The disc’s audio and video helps but one really should avoid this one at all reasonable costs.