Posts by Brent Lorentson

“Juan of the dead we kill your loved ones”

This is one of those movies I had heard about but was beginning to wonder if I’d ever get a chance to watch.  The notion of Cuba releasing a zombie comedy just kind of shocked me.  To be honest I didn’t even know they had a production company down there.  So when I noticed this title had come in to be reviewed at the Upcomingdiscs headquarters, I jumped on this, willing to fight off hordes of zombies if need be.  Thankfully there were no masses of the undead to be dispatched, and this title was mine to review.

It seems the new recycled trend in horror is the exorcism/ possession genre.  For me personally this is the only horror genre that tends to get to me, since I was brought up Catholic and the thought of the devil possessing me was thought to be a very real possibility.  The strange thing is The Exorcist seems to be the only film that I would consider great and would even say it’s one of the greatest horror films of all time.  Many films have tried to deliver, but in the end the films seem to just fall flat, the closest being The Last Exorcism though that film also has its fair share of naysayers.

It would be fair to say Lewis Black is not for everyone.  When in the mood for comedy, few people would decide on watching an old man rant and rave on a stage to the point you expect him to simply keel over from a self induced heart attack.  You won’t find any puppets or redneck humor when watching one of Black’s routines.  In fact what you can expect is at some point to maybe get a little upset if not outright offended.  But that’s okay.  He knows his routine is not for everyone, so much so in fact he even opens this show with a note of warning about what to expect from his show.  And then the anger-fueled rants continue from there.

“It’s times like this you need to think like a stoner.”

It’s not every day you get the chance to say the quote above and apply it with conviction.  But when you watch High School or any other “stoner” movie, you simply have to view them through smoke-filled glasses or the viewing experience will be in vain.  Kind of like watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show, as a movie it’s bad, but when you see it with a live performing act it becomes a completely new experience. 

Watching this film is like unearthing a time capsule, not just to another time, but what seems like another world.  It’s crazy to see how much has changed since this film’s original theatrical release back in 1975.  One moment that stuck out in particular: when they are driving along the streets of Los Angeles you might notice a sign at a gas station posting gas at 56 cents a gallon.  This is a family that is already sick of life in the big city.  I can only imagine how they would react to big city life now; would they run further into the hills or simply accept the advances in modern technology?

After solar storms ravage the earth causing the soil to overheat and scorch our forests, the few who survive are left in a barren wasteland that stretches across the globe.  The concept is an impressive one to explain the desert world we are first introduced to in the opening moments of Hell, though what’s more impressive is how this low-budget, post-apocalyptic film managed this look with simple camera tricks.  With Roland Emmerich involved as executive producer, you may be expecting big-budget recreations of famous landmarks exploding and wiped away in a giant tidal wave.

It’s not often, if ever that you’ll find me looking forward to a Hallmark Channel movie.  I have nothing against a good romance or sappy family dramas; it’s just that guys for the most part are not the target demographic.  To get to the point, this film is the chick flick guys fear being made to watch after losing the battle at the Red Box when all the other appealing titles are out and the wife or girlfriend is in no mood for action.  But thankfully the film isn’t all bad, and in fact it’s actually decent with the exception of a few clichés along the way.

As the credits rolled for this film I struggled to remember the last time I’ve been so relieved that a movie had finally come to an end.  Christian Slater and Donald Sutherland are so much better than this. Can things really be so bad that they are slumming to do this “D” grade action nonsense?  I understand a gig is a gig, but these guys used to be at least marketable names to the box office.  They still have the talent and swagger to steal a scene, so why subject them to this?  Before I digress any further, allow me to take a breath…