Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on May 20th, 2013
The conclusion of the wildly popular Twilight saga last fall left a nation of haters high-fiving each other, but it also created a giant, heart-shaped vacuum in Hollywood. Where is the industry’s next big young adult-oriented, human-on-supernatural romance franchise going to come from? This past Valentine’s Day was as good a time as any to find out if Beautiful Creatures — based on Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl’s “Caster Chronicles” series — was up to the task.
Ethan Wate (Alden Ehrenreich) can’t wait to get out of Gatlin, South Carolina. Thanks to some nimble narration, Ethan explains why he feels trapped in his fictional dead-end town, where virtually every important piece of literature is on the banned list and people enthusiastically re-enact the Civil War as if they’re expecting a different result. Ethan’s spirits brighten when he meets moody outsider Lena Duchannes (Alice Englert), who is literally the girl of his dreams. You see, Ethan has been having the same dream every night about a mysterious dark-haired beauty; unfortunately, he always dies at the end. After a rocky start (is there any other kind?), the two grow closer and Ethan discovers that Lena is a witch.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on May 20th, 2013
The problem with casting Ben Kingsley in this film’s title role is that the Oscar-winning actor is anything but common. He’s been a commanding screen presence for four solid decades, starting with his award-winning work in 1982’s Gandhi and continuing through his surprising performance in Iron Man 3. When Kingsley first appears in A Common Man, he immediately stands out in the crowded streets of Colombo, Sri Lanka thanks to a sharp goatee and his signature shorn dome. Turns out Kingsley’s inherent star power is the least of this movie’s problems.
A Common Man is a remake of the 2008 Bollywood hit A Wednesday. The film opens with news reports of recent terrorist attacks in Sri Lanka followed by an effective, nearly dialogue-free sequence of a man (Kingsley) leaving packages at different points — a bus, a shopping mall trash can, etc. — throughout the city of Colombo. The man, who calls himself Vincent, makes his way to his makeshift headquarters on a rooftop and calls overmatched Deputy Inspector General of Police Morris Da Silva (Ben Cross) to inform him he has planted five bombs across the city. He demands the release of four deadly international terrorists and threatens to detonate the bombs if his conditions aren’t met.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on May 16th, 2013
“We are your Family. We come before anything, even your own family.”
Everything about Once Upon a Time in Brooklyn — the setting, the storyline, the cast, the title — brings to mind vastly superior crime dramas. To be fair, it’s incredibly difficult to say something in this genre that hasn’t already been said brilliantly by the likes of Francis Ford Coppola, Martin Scorsese or David Chase. So instead of trying to carve out its own turf, this low-budget effort seems to almost revel in how derivative it is. At the very least, the people who made this movie seem to love gangster flicks as much as we do.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on May 15th, 2013
Even among the crowded field idyllic meadow of big-screen romances, the “Nicholas Sparks movie” has become its own lucrative sub-genre. The only other contemporary authors I can remember achieving that sort of name brand recognition are Stephen King and John Grisham. (When people went to watch a Harry Potter film, they didn’t usually say, “Let’s go see the new J.K. Rowling movie.) It’s easy to spot a Nicholas Sparks movie: the lily white leads usually live in or around one of the Carolinas, where they inevitably get drenched by a romantic, cleansing rain before coming across a pivotal letter.
The fact that Safe Haven hits every single one of these checkpoints should, in theory, make it the ultimate Nicholas Sparks movie experience. Instead, the new film — the eighth big-screen adaptation of the author’s work — comes off as a pale imitator.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on May 13th, 2013
We all know what it feels like to nod off in the middle of a film. It starts with micro-naps that last a few seconds. They’re so short, we don’t even realize we’ve fallen asleep. But when we wake up, we feel totally lost because we’ve missed a line of dialogue or scene transition. I mention this for two reasons: 1.) the confused protagonist of Tomorrow You’re Gone floats through his life in a dream-like state and 2.) watching this incomprehensible mess of a movie constantly made me feel like I’d fallen asleep and missed something. That’s a problem because I was wide awake.
The plot of Tomorrow You’re Gone — based on the novel “Boot Tracks” by Matthew F. Jones, who also wrote the screenplay — is straightforward enough. We meet Charlie Rankin (Stephen Dorff) just as he’s about to be released from prison. He receives an encoded letter from Billy “The Buddha” Pettigrew (Willem Dafoe), Charlie’s former jail-house mentor. The hidden message orders Charlie to carry out a hit, and Charlie agrees because he feels indebted to The Buddha. On his way to do the job, Charlie meets Florence (Michelle Monaghan) a flirty oddball/former porn star, and the two form an uneasy bond. After the hit doesn’t go as planned, Charlie has to dodge an unhappy Buddha. (He also spends an inordinate amount of time dodging Florence’s sexual advances because...actually, it’s not really clear why he keeps rejecting this woman who is throwing herself at him. It flies in the face of everything we know about movie ex-cons.)
Posted in: The Reel World by J C on May 10th, 2013
I still remember reading “The Great Gatsby” in my high school English class and dissecting its many themes, including the corruption of the American Dream. “One day, someone should make this into a big-budget 3D movie,” said Absolutely No One. When this project was first announced, it seemed more like a commercial parody on Saturday Night Live than a real movie. I mean, what other high school English staple was Hollywood going to co-opt next? Maybe next summer will bring To Kill a Mockingbird: Die Mockingbird Die! (in IMAX 3D, of course). It’s not that I believe 3D should be confined to cartoons, cheesy horror flicks or anytime James Cameron decides he actually wants to make a movie. The absurdity of the 3D tag for The Great Gatsby had less to do with the film’s literary origins — the extra dimension was used to stellar effect in the adventurous Life of Pi — and more to do with feeling totally unnecessary when applied to such rich source material.
My fears that the book’s substance was going to get buried under a mountain of excessive style were heightened when I found out Baz Luhrmann — most famous for the audacious, gaudy “Red Curtain Trilogy” comprised of Strictly Ballroom, Romeo + Juliet and Moulin Rouge! — would be adapting the novel. But as the film’s release date grew closer, got pushed back, and then grew closer again, something strange happened. Something even more unlikely than Jay Gatsby cranking a Jay-Z track from his iconic yellow roadster; I actually started to warm up to the idea of The Great Gatsby 3D.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on May 6th, 2013
“This is America’s war as never seen before…”
When you consider the countless documentaries, miniseries and feature films dedicated to the Second World War, you’d think the defining conflict of the 20th century has been covered from every possible angle. And you’d be wrong! History has taken to the skies with WWII From Space, a two-hour special that originally aired on the cable network in December and promised to bring viewers an unprecedented, extraterrestrial perspective of the war.
Posted in: The Reel World by J C on May 3rd, 2013
It’s easy to forget how important it was for 2008’s Iron Man to be great. After all, the film was only asked to A.) properly introduce a B-list comic hero to the movie-going masses and B.) successfully kick off what turned out to be Phase One of Marvel’s March Toward Global Domination Cinematic Universe. “Good” would’ve been a letdown; Iron Man needed to be great. Fortunately, it delivered in spades; its critical and commercial success paved the way for an unprecedented run of films that culminated with The Avengers last summer. With a release date for the Avengers sequel already on the horizon, Tony Stark and Co. have once again been asked to set the tone.
“I’m different now. I’m…well, you know who I am.”
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on April 30th, 2013
Before Jay & Silent Bob, Harold & Kumar, and Seth Rogen, James Franco and their current band of merry stoners, there was Cheech & Chong. In terms of pot humor, they were the trailblazers who happily blazed on screen and on stage. The comedy duo’s popularity hit its apex with the release of 1978’s Up in Smoke, which became the year’s highest-grossing comedy. Still, Richard “Cheech” Marin and Tommy Chong’s roots were always in music.
They released nine albums in the ‘70s and ‘80s, winning the Grammy for Best Comedy Album in 1973’s “Los Cochinos.” Some of their most famous songs and routines — including “Dave’s Not Here”, “Earache My Eye”, and “Let’s Make a Dope Deal” — have been re-imagined in Cheech and Chong’s Animated Movie!, the new Blu-ray that was released suspiciously close to April 20. (Unfortunately, this year’s 4/20 didn’t fall on a Tuesday, which is the day most home video titles are released.)
Posted in: The Reel World by J C on April 26th, 2013
People have used a lot of different words to describe Michael Bay and his films: “loud”, “blockbusters”, “mindless”, “soulless”, “Hitler” and, of course, “awesome.” One of the words you don’t normally associate with Bay’s undeniably successful output is “clever.” I daresay Pain & Gain is the most interesting movie the action auteur has ever made; the film is both seriously silly and surprisingly smart in how it presents its stupid characters.
“Unfortunately, this is a true story.”
