Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by Archive Authors on March 19th, 2012
Oh, Peter Facinelli, how I hope that this movie that just landed in my lap does NOT feature you with glitter thrown all over your body. This movie is called Loosies, and no not as in loose like Kristen Stewart. I am hoping that the tag line, “Love is not a crime”, does not mean complete suckage, but from the description on the back... I am not hoping for much. I loathe chick flicks, and this reeks of one. But on we go with an open mind and an open beer (Okay, okay, so it's a root beer! Geez!)!
Holy wow! The music that rolls during the menu screen is absolutely awful. This can not be a good sign. Woosa! This is ok with me, Bobby (Peter Facinelli) and Lucy (Jamie Alexander) are in bed. She is passed out after a romp in the hay. Next, we see him walking around a red room. He gets dressed, writes his number on a bunch of pieces of paper and walks out. He's walking around town pick pocketing people. Oh that is a lovely job. Jax (Vincent Gallo) is doing some whacked form of martial arts?
Posted in: Disc Reviews by David Annandale on March 17th, 2012
In the 1930’s, the orphaned Hugo Cabret (Asa Butterfield) lives in the access tunnels of the Gare Montparnasse in Paris, winding the clocks, making sure that no one knows his guardian uncle has long-since gone AWOL, and filching bits and pieces of mechanisms that will allow him, he hopes, to repair the automaton he keeps in his living quarters. This is his last connection to his deceased father, and his dream is that the repaired machine will grant him a message from the beyond.
But there are obstacles to his quest. Foremost is the tyrannical station inspector (Sacha Baron Cohen), who likes nothing better than rounding up street urchins and packing them off to the orphanage. Hugo also runs afoul of the bitter, disappointed old man (Ben Kingsley) whose toy store has been the source of much of his material. This encounter proves fateful for them both. The old man is none other than Georges Méliès, whose films are the ground zero of all fantasy in cinema, but who has since been forgotten by the industry he helped create. Hugo and Méliès’ granddaughter Isabelle (Chloe Moretz) become allies, determined to give Méliès back the sense of joy and wonder he once gave to so many.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on March 16th, 2012
Carnage is the (un)true story of two couples who've agreed to meet in a Brooklyn apartment — drink together and have their lives filmed (by Roman Polanski) — to find out what happens when people stop being polite and start getting real. If you had told me that one day I would be relating a Roman Polanski film to the opening credits of MTV's The Real World, I would've told you...yeah, that sounds like something I would do.
Based on God of Carnage by French playwright Yasmina Reza (who also co-wrote the screenplay with Polanski), the film follows Penelope and Michael Longstreet (Jodie Foster and John C. Reilly), who have invited Nancy and Alan Cowan (Kate Winslet and Christoph Waltz) into their home after their sons are involved in a physical altercation. As the two pairs of parents try to agree on a proper course of action, the initially cordial meeting becomes less about their respective sons, and more about their own prejudices, character flaws and childish behavior.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on March 16th, 2012
"When this world was still young, long before man or beast roamed these lands, there was a war in the heavens. Immortals, once thought incapable of death, discovered they had the power to kill one another. Lost in the war was a weapon of unimaginable power: The Epirus Bow."
I know there are a lot of you out there who can’t wait for the huge 300 sequel: 300 The Battle Of Artemisia. You might even have your calendar circled for the Clash Of The Titans remake sequel Wrath Of The Titans, also on the horizon. In case you find that you just can’t wait, director Tarsem Singh has created a weigh-station, of sorts, with his action-packed Immortals. The film takes elements from both franchises and melds them together into something very much like those films, yet unique enough to warrant some of your attention. The result is a film that is absolutely uneven in places, but entertaining enough to be worth a look.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Michael Durr on March 16th, 2012
Sometimes you just know. As a movie reviewer, I always strive for an open mind. I work for the idea that even if the cover screams snorefest or if the movie has a star I can absolutely not stand, perhaps just perhaps there is a nugget of cinema goodness underneath. Then I received Tooth Fairy 2 on Blu-Ray. After I screamed at the heaven’s above and drank myself into a deep coma, I decided that an open mind was a terrible thing to waste.
We open up to the Boardwalk Bowl and apparently they run a weekly contest where some lucky guy or gal could bowl for the chance to win a new Camaro. Here at a bowling alley, I was expecting a Ford F150, but I digress. Larry Guthrie (played by Larry the Cable Guy) ogles the car but his girlfriend Brooke (played by Erin Beute) reminds him of her niece’s birthday party. BTW, for those scoring at home, Larry has played Larry quite a few times in his acting life.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by M. W. Phillips on March 14th, 2012
“You already started reading the evil words, didn't you? Then could you pass me my blood mop? I'm gonna need it later.”
Somehow I was never aware of Todd & The Book Of Pure Evil: The Complete First Season until I received the DVDs to review. Based on the 2003 short film of the same name, Todd & The Book Of Pure Evil debuted on Canada's Space Channel in September of 2010 and was picked up for broadcast in the United States by FearNet, which started showing the series in August of 2011.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by Brent Lorentson on March 14th, 2012
Through the course of time Hollywood has given us a fair share of great sports films. There are even a few baseball films out there I’m sure are on several people’s all time favorite lists. Personally I’m a fan of The Sandlot, and I recently discovered Eight Men Out. I wouldn’t say I’m a baseball fan, and to be honest I haven’t watched an entire game in years, but yet I do love a good baseball movie. I mention this only because after watching Screwball, I seriously will be content never to watch a sports comedy again after the bad taste this left in my mouth.
This mockumentary follows the rise and fall of the great waffle ball player Ted Whitfield. His rise was during the baseball strike in ’94 and as fans turned to waffle ball to fill their baseball void, Whitfield sets out to break the homerun record. Over the course of the film we see Whitfield get involved with enhancement drugs, heavy drinking, and even dabbling into porn. A high point of the film involves Whitfield passing on his cup to his loyal team member Willie Hamilton after winning a big game. Sadly the day after Whitfield smashes the homerun record he is arrested for a DUI on a riding mower, and things just crumble from there. Once a blood test is done and it is discovered Whitfield took enhancement drugs, he is banned from the league for life.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by William O'Donnell on March 13th, 2012
A tragic accident after an uncannily choreographed dance party in the country leaves a carload of teens dead, and their hometown vows to ban all public displays of dancing and loud music. Big City hunk Ren MacCormack arrives in town to challenge this outlawing of music and dance by...mostly dancing to music.
This is a modern update of the 1984 hit film of the same name that starred Kevin Bacon in the role of Ren. Young actor Kenny Wormald steps into these dancing shoes and does a decent job being a youth who charms us through his rebellion. His look is much more James Dean-ish than Bacon's version, but still an acceptable doppelganger of the original Ren.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on March 13th, 2012
I don't think I'm breaking any news when I say that director Paul W.S. Anderson's latest action spectacle, an update of Alexandre Dumas' classic The Three Musketeers, is junk. So far, the director has specialized in taking established properties — including the Resident Evil and Mortal Kombat videogames, as well as the Alien and Predator franchises — and re-working them to fit his own shallow, highly-stylized, quick-cutting sensibilities. The result is basically the cinematic equivalent of junk food: people know those Resident Evil movies are bad, but they just can't stop consuming them.
That's why I was mildly shocked when this latest adaptation turned out to be surprisingly and sneakily faithful...well, except for the part where Da Vinci's Flying War Machine becomes a significant plot point. (This was a guy, after all, who didn't include a single character from the Resident Evil game in the first movie!)
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by Archive Authors on March 13th, 2012
By Natasha Samreny
"I'm going now. I'm going to smash up the trains. Bye bye, Mummy."
