Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on October 7th, 2015
“Man, they killed my brother…you think I’m gonna let that slide?”
Even if you haven’t sat through a ton of revenge-minded pulp, you won't be surprised to hear the answer to the above question is a resounding, “No!” The good(ish) news is that Chain of Command manages to stand out from a pretty crowded straight-to-DVD action pack. The disastrous news is that this laughably bad, shoddily-made debacle is likely to stick in your memory for all the wrong reasons.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 6th, 2015
I don't enjoy writing negative reviews. It's a struggle when the film experience was joyless and then to have to go back and relive that. I also don't enjoy reading reviews by other critics that get everything completely wrong. It's even worse when almost all the critics get it wrong. Even worse than that is when I see critics dumping on a film that's actually good, but that's a story for a different day. How can I say Spy is so bad? Because I had to sit through the movie. I can get some enjoyment out of even the worst movies, and that's true here, but I would not recommend it to unsuspecting viewers.I do imagine a lot of people will enjoy the movie despite themselves if they are paying for babysitters, etc. Again, I do think every movie has some entertainment value. I will try to find it in the new movie Spy. The first good thing I can say is that Spy is a chick flick that lets chicks save the day. They don't look great doing it, but they save the day. That's one of the problems. Almost no one looks good in this film.
The film has a great cast. Melissa McCarthy is the big star, but she shares billing with Jason Statham, Jude Law, and Rose Byrne. You can also throw in sturdy supporting players like Allison Janney and Bobby Cannavale. There are plenty more, but those are the names. I will say that the person who comes off the best is Rose Byrne. She plays a super-bitch super-villain who you truly believe doesn't like anyone. She dispatches people with the unpleasant venom of someone who doesn't like the service she is receiving at a restaurant. Jason Statham has the thankless job of making fun of himself. He seems game, but he doesn't really pull it off. He gets some of the funniest material but almost flubs most of his lines with his mush-mouth delivery. Jude Law gets the part of the perfect James Bond-type spy, but you get the hint of embarrassment in his facial mannerisms like he's trying too hard to spoof the trope.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on October 5th, 2015
“My name is Clay Marshall, and I am one of the many survivors of the zombie apocalypse.”
Yes, you read that right. The word “many” in the above quote is not a misprint. A Plague So Pleasant seeks to explore the crushingly mundane aftermath of a worldwide plague. Unfortunately, the movie appears to be of two minds in terms of presenting its skewed view of the zombie apocalypse. The result is an intriguing, uneven film that doesn't fully come together.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on October 1st, 2015
"My name is Ichabod Crane. In 1781 I died on the battlefield, but I was saved by a mysterious spell cast upon me by my wife Katrina. Now I've been reawakened 250 years later in a land I no longer recognize. And fate has led me to Miss Abigail Mills., a young police lieutenant. Investigating baffling mysteries, our real mission is in danger, and the apocalypse may be upon us, our destinies entwined."
Fans of the tale The Legend Of Sleepy Hollow will recall that Ichabod came to encounter the headless horseman in one of the first American horror tales ever written. Irving was a contemporary of our founding fathers, including another Washington who happened to play a big part in a little skirmish with the Brits that came to be known as the American Revolution here and the Great Colonial Rebellion over there. Thanks to the new series Sleepy Hollow, we discover that the British weren't the only ones we were fighting. It's a story of independence we hadn't heard before. It's a fresh take on an old idea that dates back to Kolchak: The Night Stalker. The second season is out on Blu-ray now, and I recommend you check it out. Just don't mix it up with that American history text. We history teachers frown on that kind of thing, you know.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on October 1st, 2015
“Jane’s life was now the stuff of telenovelas.”
As someone who grew up in a Spanish-speaking household, I have a love-hate relationship with telenovelas. Most of the time, I can appreciate — and heartily laugh at — their inspired, over-the-top campiness. But sometimes I honestly feel a little embarrassed that this broad, ridiculous junk easily represents the most visible outlet for stories featuring Hispanic actors/characters. I’m also insulted by the implication that Hispanic audiences don’t want more nuanced TV options. The great thing about The CW’s Jane the Virgin is that it works both as an outrageous nighttime soap and a sharp, good-hearted satire.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on September 29th, 2015
"To understand what I'm about to tell you, you need to do something first. You need to believe in the impossible. Can you do that? Good. Because all of us, we have forgotten what miracles look like. Maybe because they haven't made much of an appearance lately. Our lives have become ordinary. But there is someone out there who is truly extraordinary."
It's become so much easier to believe in the impossible in recent years. The guys over at Marvel have created an amazing theatrical universe where we escape into the comic book world of heroes at least a couple times a week. DC hasn't managed to wow us in our theater seats so much recently. What they have been able to do is deliver hours of wonderful escapism television every week. That's where the DC miracles are happening, first on Arrow and now Gotham and... The Flash. This is the decade when comic book pages truly come to life before our very eyes.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on September 28th, 2015
“I just realized that having other people around is what makes life worth living.”
This lesson doesn’t come easily — or quickly — for Phil Miller, the Last Man on Earth. On the other hand, having other people around doesn’t do a heck of a lot for The Last Man on Earth, the dementedly inventive Fox comedy that becomes considerably less interesting the more people start to show up. That being said there’s plenty to like and admire here, starting with the show’s comedic, refreshingly non-bleak look at post-apocalyptic life.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on September 25th, 2015
Season 2 of The Red Road, SundanceTV’s tense drama about warring communities, opens with a foreboding shot of blood being spilled on the ground. It’s a conspicuously symbolic image when you consider that the show follows the lives of the (seemingly all-white) residents of fictional Walpole, N.J. and their strained relationship with the Lenape tribe that resides in the neighboring Ramapo Mountains. (You don’t even have to squint to see several centuries’ worth of wounded feelings in this scenario.) It’s also no major spoiler to say that opening shot isn’t the last instance of bloodshed in this batch of episodes.
In case you never hopped on The Red Road, here’s a quick catchup. Lenape ex-con Phillip Kopus (Jason Momoa) and Walpole police officer Harold Jensen (Martin Henderson) find their fates (and their families) inextricably linked. An accident involving Harold’s wife/Phillip’s high school sweetheart Jean (Julianne Nicholson) and a young Lenape boy left Harold indebted to Phillip. And the fact that the Jensens’ oldest daughter Rachel (Allie Gonino) and Phillip’s younger half-brother Junior (Kiowa Gordon) were in love only added to the tension. The end of season 1 once again left Phillip and Harold in each other’s debt after helping one another survive a violent shootout with a nasty group of gangsters.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on September 24th, 2015
"My name is Oliver Queen; after five years in hell, I have come home with only one goal, to save my city. Now others have joined my crusade. To them, I'm Oliver Queen. To the rest of Starling City, I'm someone else. I am something else."
That someone, that something more ...that something else is the DC Comics character Green Arrow. Not to be confused with the same-colored Hornet or Lantern. In season 2 Oliver Queen finally shed the name and reputation of the Hood or Vigilante. He vowed not to kill, and he no longer has the list to guide him. His job now is to go after any bad guys in Starling City. In season 3 that job will get a lot harder to do while still keeping his vow. You can say that things get a lot more personal and that season 3 of The Arrow is all about family. And, you can bet that not everyone is getting out alive. Those who remain will be forever changed. That much is certain.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on September 23rd, 2015
If ever a show were more aptly named, it would have to be HBO's The Jinx. It's a documentary on Robert Durst, who had been charged with three murders and never convicted. The title comes from his own description of why he never had any children. He believed he would be a jinx to any child as a father. It turns out that this HBO series would be a jinx for Durst himself, because he couldn't quite keep his mouth shut and ends up making potentially incriminating statements. The suspect was arrested just hours before the last episode of the show aired on HBO. We might have to get into the whole art-imitating-life-imitating-art conversation. One thing is certain. This show had an impact on the real world like few shows ever had. But that's not the only reason I'm going to tell you that you simply must see The Jinx out on Blu-ray from HBO.
It begins like something out of Dexter. In Galveston, Texas, a grisly discovery is made. There are body parts washing in from the bay in garbage bags. Eventually an entire body is discovered except for the head. The evidence leads to the victim's next-door neighbor Robert Durst, who had been staying there disguised as a woman. An arrest is quickly made, and it looks like a slam-dunk conviction. But this seemingly poor man posts a $250,000 bond the very next morning and takes flight.
