Horror

I didn’t know what to make of this Pig/1334 double bill when I took it on as my latest assignment. All I had to go on were the aggressively grotesque images on the Blu-ray case. I wasn’t yet familiar with the work of Dutch filmmaker Nico B. or former Christian Death frontman Rozz Williams. I did a bit of research, mostly because I wanted to make sure I wasn’t being handed a real-life version of the videotape from The Ring.  (Surely, there would be a less drastic way of informing me my services were no longer required on this site.) What I uncovered instead was an intriguing and haunting back story.

Here’s the thing. Fans of the franchise should be pleased with the latest entry. The series has been a solid October tradition for some time now. When you consider the low cost of creating one of these films with the proven box office numbers, this was all really a no-brainer, to say the least. You’re going to get more of what you are expecting, and the film throws in enough new angles and tricks to keep the idea as fresh as possible. However, there is a flip-side to all of this. I don’t think it’s very likely that you can enjoy this film quite so fully if you have not seen any of the previous films.

Anytime a horror film is released with a religious element, I can’t help but be a little interested.  The film that first won me over for this sub-genre was, of course, The Exorcist, and ever since seeing that film I keep hoping that one day a film will hold up to it in quality, but it seems I’ll be waiting a while.  That’s not to say there haven’t been some good films to come out along the way.  The Possession is one of those valiant attempts that brings something fresh to the genre but never quite reaches its full potential.

As The Walking Dead continues to smash ratings records (while compulsively changing showrunners, no less) and Summit Entertainment — the studio behind The Twilight Saga — prepares to throw its considerable marketing muscle behind February’s zombie rom-com Warm Bodies, it’s fair to say the shambling undead are having a major pop culture moment. Yes, zombies are hot right now, but a curious subgenre has already endured for many decades: I’m talking about the zombie Nazi movie.

To be a cannibal or not to be?  That seems to be the question we will all have to ask ourselves if we ever go on to live in a post-apocalyptic society.  Sure it’s in the name of survival, but can things really get so bad that one day I could be huddled up with a group of survivors and everyone wondering whose the next to keel over and if there are any special recipes someone would like to try out?  Remember it’s all in the name of survival,

"Fairlake, West Virginia, established in 1814. The entire population disappeared in 1817. To this day nobody knows what happened to them."

I know what you're thinking. When I look at a direct-to-video horror series and see a number 5 next to the name, it's usually time to roll my eyes and reluctantly place the disc in my Blu-ray player so that I can warn you guys just how bad it really is. But we're not talking about just any horror title. We're talking about the Wrong Turn franchise, which has actually gotten better since it went into sequel-hell.

"Long story short, I want to reshape my navel, and allowance won't cover it."

Long story short is precisely the words I would use to describe Excision. You see, it started out as a short subject film and writer/director Richard Bates, Jr. decided to make it his first feature film. That was his first mistake. While I have never seen the short film that inspired this feature, I get the strong feeling that this was better served in that format.

"I'm so proud of my boys. They never forget their Momma."

What did you do for your mother the last Mother's Day? Did you buy her some flowers and candy? Perhaps you took her out for a little adventure. You might have even cooked her a special meal. If you're like Ike (Coffin) and his brothers, you treat your mom to a show. You torture, rape, and kill a few women who happen to find themselves in the woods. Good times, right?

“What cannot be disputed is your imagination is the inspiration of a horrendous crime.”

The Raven may not be a turkey, but it doesn’t really soar either. Director James McTeigue (V for Vendetta) attempts to fashion a historical fiction around the mysterious final five days of Edgar Allen Poe’s life. A notorious drunk and opium addict, Poe (John Cusack) careens through 19th century Baltimore dead broke, bitter from years of writer’s block, and harassed by the locals for being a blustering has-been. Due to a distinct lack of social sympathy, he can’t even borrow money for a single drink

"Sometimes dead is better."

From the rather twisted mind of Stephen King, Pet Sematary is actually one of my favorites of his horror novels. It’s scary to think the story was never meant to be published and only offered up to finish a contract with his earlier publisher. As has been the Stephen King plague at nearly every turn, something ends up lost in the translation. In the novel, the deeper subtexts that King is so adept at take several hundred pages to set up and ultimately pay off. Unfortunately a mere couple of hours of celluloid never …seem to scratch the graveyard surface soil