Disc Reviews

Shout Factory this week releases a Jackie Chan double feature that I can actually stand behind and say, “Yes, buy this.”  Chan has been churning out movies since the early 60’s, and with a rumored retirement looming, soon we’ll only have his vast catalog of films to gush and cringe over.  Though I think it is safe to say his body could use a break; after all, how many broken bones has this man sacrificed all in the name of cinema?

Do you realize how much you’re affected by advertising? Branded attempts to answer this question while showing us where our world is headed if the trend continues. Mishka Galkin (Ed Stoppard, The Pianist) is Russia’s advertising whiz kid. When Mishka meets Abby (Leelee Sobieski, 88 Minutes, The Wicker Man), they immediately become friends, despite the fact that she is the niece of Bob Gibbons (Jeffrey Tambor, TVs Arrested Development, the Hellboy movies), Mishka’s boss.

Learning your ABCs and 123s are perhaps the most broad and basic themes an educational children's televion show could take.  Nickelodeon offers a roster of their most popular shows (at least, those designed for pre-schoolers) to cover said topics in two seperate DVD releases. Each DVD is virtually identical in structure. There only difference are to particular episodes chosen from each show.

Erle Stanley Gardner wrote crime fiction, and while many of his 100 or so works are unknown to most of us, he created a character who has become as identified with criminal lawyers as any other in fiction. It was in these crime novels that Perry Mason first faced a courtroom. He developed a style where he would investigate these terrible crimes his clients were on trial for. He would find the real killer, and in what has become a Hollywood cliché, reveal his findings in a crucial moment during the trial.

The first time I really observed George Lopez was during his sitcom on ABC, The George Lopez Show. After that first episode, I was hooked and watched every episode religiously up until the departure of Masiela Lusha (the new storylines and the introduction of Aimee Garcia as Lusha’s  replacement caused the show to lose much of its original  appeal). From there I transitioned to his standups specials and his big screen movie appearances. If he was in it, I was there.

“The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.”

We’re now 40 years removed from Bruce Lee’s shocking death, and the martial arts superstar has unequivocally achieved pop culture immortality. I Am Bruce Lee examines the icon’s cultural and cinematic impact, as well as the many ways he has influenced current sports and music stars. The film already bills itself as “the best Bruce Lee documentary ever,” so I’m not really sure what you need me (or any other critic) for. I decided to go ahead and watch it anyway.

"Space... The final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its continuing mission, to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no one has gone before."

It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. No, this is not a Charles Dickens review. It very accurately describes the second season of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Just as I was starting to believe that the vampire movie genre was bankrupt of originality, I am gifted with a film unlike any other vampire film I’ve ever seen. Don’t you just love when that happens? I’m not going to pretend that I didn’t have reservations about this movie going in, especially with it being a sequel to The Hamiltons, a film I had not seen nor heard of before this film made it onto my docket. However all of my reservations subsided within fifteen minutes of pressing the play button. With a title like “The Thompsons” I was expecting it to be nothing more than vamp ripoff of Rob Zombie’s The Devil’s Rejects, but this film has heart along with the appropriate amount of blood and gore to keep it from becoming too sappy.

What do you do when you have to choose between the law and what is morally right? Lieutenant Danny Sefton (Seth Gabel, TV’s Dirty Sexy Money and Fringe) faces that very problem in Allegiance. Having lost the respect of the men in his command by transferring to a recruiting position right before they are to deploy to Iraq, Sefton faces a crisis of conscience when one of those men — Specialist Chris Reyes (Shad “Bow Wow” Moss, Like Mike, Roll Bounce) — has his non-deployment waiver revoked.

Probably most known for his roasts on Comedy Central, Anthony Jeselnik offers an hour (included the many long pauses) of stand-up comedy that is 100% bad taste. Dark humour and a huge ego are Jeselnik's shtick so you have absolutely every reason to walk away from this...except you might actually catching yourself laughing.