Anchor Bay

“God never would have intended this.”

Has anyone ever noticed the pairings that tend to occur in disaster films? A lone scientist with an expertise in a particular field of study partners with a lone government agent or soldier to prevent a cataclysmic event that will result in the destruction of mankind, whether the disaster is manmade or an act of fate. This was in the case in Godzilla (American version), Independence Day (there may be some controversy on whether this qualifies but you must admit that the main focus was on Smith and Goldblum), miniseries Asteroid, and now it would seem Seeds of Destruction.

If the average civilian had been through the same stresses that you have been through, undoubtedly they too would have developed the same nervous conditions.”

The first time I saw The Master, I really didn’t like it. It was a terrible feeling. I’m a huge Paul Thomas Anderson fan, and Boogie Nights is one of my 10 favorite films of all time. So I walked into that theater excited to see what was being called a landmark achievement: the “Scientology movie” that wasn’t really about Scientology (but actually kinda was) helmed by one of the most talented directors working today.

“You think football builds character? It does not; football reveals character.”

The open secret about sports movies is that they’re not really about sports. Most of the great ones use the games people play as a dynamic arena to tell universal stories about struggle, underdogs overcoming impossible odds, greatness and redemption. You don’t have to know a nose guard from a mouth guard to enjoy a football movie. By that same token, Undefeated may chronicle a grueling real-life high school football season, but I wasn’t surprised to see it play out like a lot of fictional sports flicks.

“What’s the matter? Don’t you like role-playing?”

I was on the verge of writing this film off as another zombie flick hoping to capture on the popularity brought about by the AMC series The Walking Dead, but then….BAM! It brought forth a plot twist that veered it away from all other zombie movies and grabbed my attention. It was no longer a zombie film; it was much more interesting.

The image of what a bully looks and sounds like has changed drastically in recent years. When you and I were growing up, a “bully” was probably someone who looked like this and demanded your lunch money. Mean Girls came out less than 10 years ago; but if Tina Fey were trying to get the exact same movie made today, she’d probably have to deal with notes from a nervous studio exec worried that the Burn Book would drive one of the characters to suicide.

Bully — director Lee Hirsch’s heartbreaking and intensely-personal project — has lofty aspirations. In presenting five affecting stories of abuse that don’t necessarily involve black eyes or bloody noses, the documentary seeks to eradicate bullying by inspiring and educating the current generation of elementary, middle and high school students.

I see an Oscar nominee, an Emmy nominee, an actor who has carried two successful TV shows, and the bad guy from the highest-grossing movie of all time. In other words, I see more talent than you would ordinarily expect from a straight-to-DVD drama. Then again, I also see Soulja Boy, but he’s not the problem. Instead, Officer Down squanders a few fine performances and a solid premise due to some seriously (and unnecessarily) muddled storytelling.

Det. David Callahan (Stephen Dorff) may as well have “Dirty” in front of his name, but it’s not because he tears through bureaucratic red tape in his pursuit of justice; it’s because “Cal” always looks like he desperately needs a shower. Callahan is a former crooked cop/drug addict/philanderer who changed his bad boy ways after narrowly surviving a gun shot wound during a drug bust gone wrong. Cal never knew the identity of the man who saved his life until the Good Samaritan comes forward one year later.

When I first received Love Me, I thought it was going to be just another angsty teen drama. (Something along the lines of Dawson’s Creek.) That notion was quickly disabused, however, when a young girl is stalked and attacked in the opening scene. From there, the film jumps ahead three months, with the town still reeling from her disappearance. While discussing how eerie the case is with her friends, Sylvia Potter (Lindsay Shaw, TV’s Pretty Little Liars) quite literally bumps into rich pretty boy Lucas Green (Jamie Johnston, TV’s Degrassi: The Next Generation) and falls for him instantly.

Fortunately for Sylvia, the feeling is mutual and, despite her friend’s many protests, Sylvia begins dating Lucas. As their relationship deepens, Sylvia discovers some unsettling things about Lucas, including the fact that he was dating the missing girl at the time of her disappearance and police consider him the prime suspect. As the pressure mounts and new evidence comes to light, Sylvia must decide what — and, more importantly, who — she believes.

“Our enemy here is Al-Qaeda. It’s no secret they are not afraid to die. Neither are we. Tonight we know why we are here. We know who we are. Tonight we fight for something truly greater than ourselves. Tonight we ride.”

“It’s a good day to be a SEAL, good day to be an American.” Yes, I am aware that I’ve already opened with a film quote, but truthfully this film has quite a few good ones. Seal Team Six is the telling of Operation Geronimo, the successful mission that lead to the assassination of Al-Qaeda leader and engineer of the September 11th attack, Osama Bin Laden. I’m sure there are many that are thinking “why would a made-for-television film be made when on January 11, Zero Dark Thirty will premiere worldwide?” They may view the making of this film as a waste of money. They would be absolutely wrong.

 "In 1920 they passed the prohibition act making the sale of alcohol illegal. Well... at least it was supposed to be."

I know what you’re thinking, and I was also incredibly disappointed to learn this film was not a biopic of Xena: Warrior Princess actress Lucy Lawless. (This hypothetical film would obviously star the ageless Kiwi, because the actress still looks incredible.) Fortunately, Lawless makes up for its startling lack of Lawless by being one of the better films I’ve seen this year.

To be a cannibal or not to be?  That seems to be the question we will all have to ask ourselves if we ever go on to live in a post-apocalyptic society.  Sure it’s in the name of survival, but can things really get so bad that one day I could be huddled up with a group of survivors and everyone wondering whose the next to keel over and if there are any special recipes someone would like to try out?  Remember it’s all in the name of survival, and in the words of Andrew Zimmern, “If it looks good, eat it!”

The Day isn’t just a movie about cannibals; in fact they are simply in the background for the story of five survivors trying to make it day to day in a cruel, unforgiving landscape.  It’s never made clear what has happened to the world our survivors live in, but it’s understood that a large portion of society is dead, and those that remain can do nothing more than prepare themselves for the inevitable.  These survivalist movies need to be bleak and depressing, because let’s face it, when the world has managed to reach the point of creating a near extinction of the human race, having hope is a bit naïve.  And that seems to be what the film makers understood when creating The Day.