Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on October 16th, 2015
“People have short attention spans. And there’s always another murder.”
Barely a year after Gone Girl became a mid-range blockbuster, we're already getting our second big-screen adaptation of a Gillian Flynn novel. To be fair, both Gone Girl and Dark Places went into production around the same time in the fall of 2013. But that just means someone anticipated that a single shot of Flynn's twisted brand of Midwest murder/mystery mayhem wouldn't be enough to satisfy movie audiences.
Posted in: No Huddle Reviews by J C on October 14th, 2015
“We'll get hit again...and it's going to be a bigger monster.”
The character who utters these words in San Andreas is referring to an impending earthquake that could literally rip California apart. But he could just as easily be talking about the summer movie season, when audiences who have just been rocked by a catastrophic quake have to deal with something called “Indominus Rex” a mere two weeks later. San Andreas almost certainly won't end up as the biggest bully on the Hollywood block, but it's a big, dumb, fun disaster flick the whole family can enjoy.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on October 8th, 2015
“They’re hee-eere”
That instantly-iconic horror movie line — delivered in a cheery, chilling, sing-songy voice by the late Heather O’Rourke — signaled the arrival of malevolent spirits in 1982’s Poltergeist. In 2015, “they’re hee-eere” could just as easily refer to the latest glut of horror remakes. (Thankfully, there’s still at least one *sacred* cow.) That list now includes a new version of Poltergeist, which features some solid thrills and (for better and for worse) sticks pretty closely to the original.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on October 7th, 2015
The last decade hasn’t been too kind to Al Pacino. The man is only one of our greatest living actors, but he’s mostly been stuck appearing in forgettable tripe (88 Minutes) or out-and-out atrocities (Jack and Jill) for the last 10 years. So it’s easy to overlook the fact that Pacino is quietly doing really good work again. I say “quietly” because the actor has recently eschewed the “hoo-ah!” tics that turned him into a caricature. This affecting, engaged, and more subdued version of Pacino can be seen in Danny Collins, and he is also front-and-center in Manglehorn, a whimsical, uneven drama that is grounded by its star’s strong work.
Pacino plays A.J. Manglehorn, a shabby, solitary locksmith whose biggest personal connection is with his beloved cat Fanny. As we watch Manglehorn shuffle through each day — which includes hopping in his rickety van to help clients who have locked themselves out of various places — his life starts to come into focus.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Archive Authors on October 6th, 2015
I don't enjoy writing negative reviews. It's a struggle when the film experience was joyless and then to have to go back and relive that. I also don't enjoy reading reviews by other critics that get everything completely wrong. It's even worse when almost all the critics get it wrong. Even worse than that is when I see critics dumping on a film that's actually good, but that's a story for a different day. How can I say Spy is so bad? Because I had to sit through the movie. I can get some enjoyment out of even the worst movies, and that's true here, but I would not recommend it to unsuspecting viewers.I do imagine a lot of people will enjoy the movie despite themselves if they are paying for babysitters, etc. Again, I do think every movie has some entertainment value. I will try to find it in the new movie Spy. The first good thing I can say is that Spy is a chick flick that lets chicks save the day. They don't look great doing it, but they save the day. That's one of the problems. Almost no one looks good in this film.
The film has a great cast. Melissa McCarthy is the big star, but she shares billing with Jason Statham, Jude Law, and Rose Byrne. You can also throw in sturdy supporting players like Allison Janney and Bobby Cannavale. There are plenty more, but those are the names. I will say that the person who comes off the best is Rose Byrne. She plays a super-bitch super-villain who you truly believe doesn't like anyone. She dispatches people with the unpleasant venom of someone who doesn't like the service she is receiving at a restaurant. Jason Statham has the thankless job of making fun of himself. He seems game, but he doesn't really pull it off. He gets some of the funniest material but almost flubs most of his lines with his mush-mouth delivery. Jude Law gets the part of the perfect James Bond-type spy, but you get the hint of embarrassment in his facial mannerisms like he's trying too hard to spoof the trope.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on September 21st, 2015
“Have courage and be kind.”
Those words — repeated many times in this newest version of Cinderella — serve as both the title character’s mantra and the film’s unofficial tagline. The message is elegant in its simplicity in a way that mirrors this refreshingly old-fashioned adaptation, which resists the prevailing urge to modernize and/or revise a classic story.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Jeremy Butler on September 14th, 2015
“All these years you’ve lived, but you’ve never had a life.”
Every woman’s fantasy: to remain young and beautiful forever. That is the fantasy, if I am not mistaken, correct? Well, women will be treated to the cost of said fantasy in The Age of Adaline, which shows the other side of the coin of the coveted fantasy. In my experience there are two fantasies that are popular among young ladies. The one mentioned above, and the opportunity to love, marry, and grow old with someone who loves them unconditionally. The Age of Adaline shows the latter is not possible with the former.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on September 10th, 2015
American Heist is an independent action flick that eventually nods to Michael Mann's Heat and Sidney Lumet's Dog Day Afternoon. (Along with Ben Affleck's The Town, if you're interested in a 21st century doppelganger.) However, the movie's action-packed finale can't completely disguise the fact that this is actually a dour family tragedy masquerading as a heist film. But if imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, at least the makers of American Heist know who to rip off flatter.
James Kelly (Hayden Christensen) is an ex-con trying to go legit; his big dream is to open his own auto repair shop. Those dreams get turned upside down when his older brother Frankie (Adrien Brody) is released from prison after 10 years. Frankie took the lion's share of the rap for a crime the brothers committed together. Now Frankie is looking to James — an Iraq war veteran with a useful knowledge of explosives — to help him repay a debt to a pair of shady characters named Sugar and Ray (Akon, Tory Kittles), after they helped protect Frankie in prison. James gets an extra jolt of motivation when his former flame Emily (Jordana Brewster) re-enters the picture long enough to be threatened by Sugar and Ray. It all leads to the titular bank Heist, which is meant to give the brothers a fresh start. I don't think it's a spoiler to say that no one gets away clean.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by Gino Sassani on September 5th, 2015
"1836, Republic of Texas. The Mexican territory is home to thousands of US settlers. Tensions rise as Comanche and Kawakawa fight to keep their lands. Outlaws roam free, and slaves are caught in the crossfire. Mexican General Santa Anna battles to reclaim the land. US President Andrew Jackson is hesitant to intervene, and Texas has no choice but to declare itself an independent nation... The Alamo in ashes, pioneers, Tejanos, Indians and soldiers have no choice: fight or die."
Houston, we have a problem. No, I'm not talking about an ill-fated and ill-numbered Apollo craft hobbled between the Earth and the Moon.
But that was the call that went out to General Sam Houston in 1836 as General Santa Anna massacred the residents of The Alamo and continued his bloody march through the newly-formed Republic of Texas. Only one man could lead an army against him, and he appeared inclined to do nothing at all. But it was all part of a skillful strategy that would turn the course of a war and North American history itself. He's the man the city was named for. This is how he lived up to that name. The story starts here.
Posted in: Disc Reviews by J C on September 4th, 2015
If nothing else, The Curse of Downers Grove lives up (or rather down) to its morose title. It’s too bad because this (non-)thriller actually has a promising premise: every year, a supposed curse in the titular suburban Illinois town kills a senior at the local high school. The movie could’ve gone for darkly comic thrills or tried to construct a mystery around who the latest victim might be, to name just a couple of examples. Instead, this shoddy, inert flick squanders a variety of opportunities on the way to its preposterous conclusion.
The action here picks up with one week to go in the school year. Chrissie Swanson (Bella Heathcote) is a sharp, skeptical senior who doesn’t fully believe in the curse, despite witnessing the previous year’s victim plunge to his death. Did the curse kill him and the other teens or was it bad luck and good ol’ fashioned stupidity? I’m sure the fact that the high school was built on sacred Native American ground has nothing to do with anything.
